Of course, that all happened over Monday and Tuesday, so I doubt there are any changes on SmackDown, but I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't a little bit excited and hopeful for the near future. Finger crossed.

Or maybe it doesn't fucking matter, since WWE will do what WWE wants to do. Is it cynical to think that WWE may throw the divas a bone for a couple weeks (or at least until WrestleMania) before relegating them back to second-class superstars? AJ even tweeted to Stephanie that divas are underpaid and deserve more screen time, and Stephanie tweeted back a mildly passive-aggressive reply, so I'm not exactly optimistic for the divas' long-term prospects. One can hope, though.

Oh, and Rey Mysterio is officially off the roster. I'm a little surprised the OO Forums haven't mentioned either of these things yet, especially since usually I'm the last one to find out... well, anything. Or, maybe they did, and I overlooked it because I'm stupid.

...Yeah, that's the more likely scenario.

Anyway, I figured for the two of you who read my recaps but not Twitter trends or other wrestling websites, I'd pass that news along. If the divas get more screen time, I'll be happy. I'm also happy drinking 99 Bananas, which I didn't realize was a thing until I went to the liquor store a few days ago. It's been a strange, educational week.

All right, enough about booze and women. Let's get to SmackDown.

Segment 1: Daniel Bryan hits the ring to start the show, and he's got a mic. And, uh, he goes heel by shouting “No! No! No!”? Oh wait, he's giving us a little reverse-psychology, and he says that he used to say “No,” because he thought that no one was on his side. He knows he's wrong now, since he got to WrestleMania last year and won the title with the fans' support. He lost the title afterward of course, though he got his second chance to get everything back at Fast Lane. DB admits he failed in his attempt, and now that he's not going to main-event WrestleMania, does that mean the Yes Movement is dead? No! No! No!

...Meh. The fans are totally onboard with this, but it's just not resonating with me. DB brings it back though by saying he does have plans for WrestleMania 31, but Bad News Barrett interrupts him before we can hear what those plans are. Barrett says that DB won't get any WrestleMania this year, since losers like him don't deserve the spotlight, and neither does Dean Ambrose; Ambrose may have the physical belt, but BNB is still the Intercontinental Champion. So if DB doesn't exit his ring—a statement that seems out of nowhere since BNB came down for basically no reason—then BNB is going to beat the crap out of him.

Ambrose then hits the ring while carrying the title, and he and BNB start punching each other without provocation. The fight spills outside the ring, but the belt was tossed inside it; DB picks it up to the crowd's cheering, even as Barrett throws Ambrose head-first into the barricade. Barrett recovers and gets in the ring, then insists that DB give him his title. DB burns a little time but gives it up peacefully... which gave Ambrose time to get in the ring and sucker-punch Barrett, who drops it again. DB hits him with a roundhouse kick, and Barrett powders out. Ambrose holds the belt, and DB leads the fans in a Yes chant.

And, uh, that's it. I mean, I guess this is setting up some sort of tag match tonight, but it seemed awfully random.

After ads, Ambrose remains in the ring (with the IC belt), as he's in the opening match.

Segment 2 [Singles Match]: Dean Ambrose defeats The Miz by pin. Standard feeling-out to start. As they do so, the commentators tell us that Mizdow is missing since he's shooting a commercial or something, the implication being that we'll see what that commercial is tonight. We'll see.

Miz goes dirty to get an advantage over Ambrose, with sharp stomps and illegal face locks. It doesn't do much for him, as Ambrose uses punchy-punchy offense and a couple shoulder charges to keep Miz contained. Ambrose even hits his running bulldog to keep Miz down.

That's when Barrett comes down to the ring and grabs his title belt. Ambrose chases him and takes it back for a moment, but when he goes back to the ring, Miz catches him and tries the Skull Crushing Finale. Ambrose slips out and hits Dirty Deeds, then makes the pin, but Barrett takes ownership of his belt and makes off with it. Ambrose seems irritated, but not overly so.

Segment 3: After ads, Renee Young catches up to Barrett in the back. Barrett dismisses her question before she can get it out, and instead states that he's totally going to keep the belt in his sight forever, and Ambrose can't hold a candle to him in the ring.

Segment 4 [Singles Match]: Natalya (w/ Tyson Kidd & Cesaro) defeats Naomi (w/ the Usos) by pin. Standard feeling-out and an even exchange of moves to start. It's a little on the slow side as the ladies basically go spot-to-spot rather than making it smooth, but it gives them a chance to show off their athleticism. Naomi gets the early momentum with a scissored neck hold out of nowhere, which Natalya powers out of. From there, they hit each other with dual cross bodies, to which the crowd doesn't overly care, but it looked pretty sick... it's a spot that always causes me to grimmace.

Both ladies rise, and then Naomi gives Natalya a stiff kick to her knee. Natalya retreats to the corner, and Tyson Kidd hops up to distract Naomi. The four guys all kick and punch each other for a moment, with the Usos winning the exchange, and Natalya sells her leg while using the ropes to hold herself up. The ref checks on her in case she's hurt, thus making Naomi drop her guard... then Natalya hits a discuss clothesline out of nowhere since she was totally playing possum. It's a finisher apparently, and she makes the pin.

Segment 5: As we come back from ads, Rusev and Lana are in the ring. They blather that they won't take Cena's challenge from Monday for a rematch because champions don't have to listen to anyone. Oh, and Vladimir Putin wrote Rusev an e-mail, and we get to see its contents on the Titantron, because Putin loves Rusev, and Rusev loves Putin.

Rusev says a nice burn that he “will have a good match at WrestleMania against an opponent that's actually worth my time.” Heh.

Uh, and then Jack Swagger appears? He hits some cheap pops, hits the ring, then beats the crap out of Rusev. It's a total beatdown, in and around the ring, until Swagger makes a mistake in leaning through the ropes to try a punch to Rusev. Rusev slips it, hits a clubbing blow of his own, then hits a big side kick. Swagger oversells, and Rusev slides in the ring to apply the Accolade. Rusev breaks it, his Russian flag appears, and then Rusev reapplies it just to be a jerk. Two refs arrive to pull him off, and he and Lana celebrate their weird moral victory in the ring.

Pre-Segment 6: Barrett is in the ring with Daniel Bryan for a match. Barrett refuses to hand the title to the timekeeper, and just keeps it under the corner turnbuckle instead.

Oh, and R-Truth is on commentary for this match.

Segment 6 [Singles Match]: Daniel Bryan defeats Bad News Barrett by pin. Barrett with the early offense with punchy-kicky roughneck stuff. That lasts about twenty seconds, but then DB takes over with some punchy-kicky strikes. He does a partial surfboard as well, but when Barrett retreats from that, he kicks DB's knee out when DB goes to follow. Barrett hits a couple moves, including a snap suplex, then hits the Winds of Change off a counter. Barrett fails the pin attempt, but dumps DB out of the ring to take a breather. Barrett even hops a couple times while holding the IC title aloft as we go to ads.

Back, and Barrett has DB in the ropes and is beating on him. DB manages to power out of a sleeper and get a mini rally with Yes Kicks that actually work. Meanwhile, Truth does read Twitter, and he says that we should start tweeting “Give Truth a Chance,” as he's riding the divas' coattails. Shortly after, DB makes a mistake as he whiffs on the running knee to the corner. Interestingly, just at the moment of his impact, the camera switches to that lo-res turnbuckle camera we first saw at Fast Lane. I guess that's just a thing now.

Anyway, after the whiff, the title falls off the apron, so Barrett spends time worrying about it instead of pushing his momentum. DB kicks him in the face as he tries to enter the ring, then follows up with the Flying Goat through the ropes. DB flings Barrett back in the ring and goes to the top rope, but Barrett quickly crotches him on it. Barrett then pulls DB down and teases the Wasteland, but DB locks in the Yes Lock. While Barrett fights it, Truth makes a show of stealing the IC title belt and hides it under his shirt. Barrett manages to get to the ropes and breaks the hold.

Meanwhile, Barrett hits a side kick and throws DB shoulder-first into the ring post, then signals for the Bullhammer Elbow. However, DB bursts out of the corner with a running knee, which we see with a different lo-res turnbuckle cam, so not only is it a thing, it's a thing from at least two of the corners. Huh.

Anyway, DB hits the knee clean, makes the pin, and even Truth gets on board with the Yes Fingers. After DB retreats back to the locker room, Barrett looks for and can't find his title. He first blames Michael Cole for stealing it, then decides that Truth is the prime suspect. Truth even lifts up his shirt (since he moved it to under the table), and Barrett just accepts it. He plants ass on the commentating table and looks like he witnessed his cat just get run over by a garbage truck.

Segment 7: Byron Saxton interviewed Roman Reigns earlier in an office, and we see that now. Reigns is full of confidence that he's totally going to beat Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania, and dismisses Paul Heyman's blathering on Monday. Reigns hates being told he “can't beat Brock Lesnar,” since he hates the word “can't” in basically any context.

Reigns knows it'll be a challenge though, and he's going to be studying tapes and training hard to do it, but he knows it won't be just athleticism to beat him. Thing is, Reigns has never main-evented WrestleMania, and while he usually wants to do things on his own, he'll “need to tap into his resources like his friends and family” to ask them for advice. Does eveyone smell what he's cooking with that line?

Anyway, he goes on to counter what he said in out-of-character interviews as he says that he knows this is a once in a lifetime opportunity, that he's totally humble about it, and realizes that the “rug can be pulled” any moment. His words are falling flat and don't sound natural, though. Reigns concludes by repeating once more that he will so totally beat Lesnar at WrestleMania, and he doesn't care if we don't “believe that,” since he knows it, and will prove it.

Segment 8: Truth runs into Ambrose in the back, and they have an (intentionally) awkward conversation since Truth is carrying around the IC belt. Ambrose says the wants the belt back... and Truth just gives it to him with a smile. Heh.

Pre-Segment 9: Curtis Axel approaches the ring for a match and once again pimps himself as never having been eliminated from the Royal Rumble, which means he's still in it. He's even set the record for longest time spent in the Royal Rumble match, complete with a count-up timer on the Titantron, advertising that he's been in the match for 32 days! ...which he reads as “32 hours,” much to the delight of the fans and Jerry Lawler.

He screams “AxelMania” a bunch of times before getting started, and his flub had the ripple effect of making Cole declare that “Fandango is going one-on-one against Fandango” tonight, which Saxton had some fun with too.

Segment 9 [Singles Match]: Fandango (w/ Rosa Mendes) squashes Curtis Axel by pin. Nope.

Segment 10: We smash cut from the match to the back, where Mizdow is doing his commercial on a green screen. Miz arrives to talk shit to Mizdow and insults his acting style. Miz insists to the director that he could act circles around Mizdow and should take his place. The director gives him the script, which Miz tosses over his shoulder, and insists that the only script he needs is his face. The director is fine with it, but we don't know what the product is yet (just a “pill that will set you straight”), so we have a classic bit of comedy setup here.

Miz insists, in fact, that he doesn't even care about what the product is. He dismisses Mizdow from the frame, then takes his place. Mizdow sadly shakes his head as we end the angle.

Segment 11: Montage of Sting's history.

Segment 12 [Singles Match]: Goldust squashes Adam Rose (w/ Rose Buds) by pin. Nope.

After the match, Goldust starts to leave, but one of the Rose Buds attacks him. He demasks, and it's Stardust, who just beats the shit out of Goldust.

Segment 13: Bray Wyatt appears on the Titantron to talk shit directly to the Undertaker, taking some insult at not being replied to yet. Bray once again insists that if Taker doesn't come to him, he'll find Taker.

Segment 14 [Six-Man Tag Match]: Ryback, Dolph Ziggler, & Erick Rowan defeat Seth Rollins, Big Show, & Kane (w/ J&J Security) by pin. Kane and Rowan to start as they exchange power moves. That includes a fallaway slam from Rowan to Kane, which was a pretty impressive move. Rowan follows up with a spinning elbow off the middle rope, then holds Kane as he tags in Ziggler. Ziggler hits a few moves too, including a dropkick, but Kane drives Dolph to the heels' corner. Rollins tags himself in and delivers a few shots to Dolph, but Dolph reverses momentum and hits a neckbreaker and an elbow drop. Ziggler whiffs on the Famous-Er from there, and Rollins tags in Show. Show takes full control of Dolph from there, flinging him around like a toy as we go to ads.

Back, and it's Kane who has Dolph in control. Dolph has a mini-rally that goes nowhere, and then Rollins tags in to continue the heel beatdown. Another tag to Show, who hits a middle rope splash and pins. Ziggler kicks out and even hits the Famous-Er as a follow-up. Show tags to Kane, who punches Rowan off the apron, but Ziggler hits his jumping spike DDT to put Kane down.

Double tags to Ryback and Rollins, and Rollins goes house of fire. J&J run distraction, causing a Pier... Eight Brawl? Even though it's five-on-three? I dunno.

Anyway, the result of the sequence is Rollins trying a top rope something, Ryback catching him in a Shell Shock position, Kane coming out of nowhere to make the save and tease a chokeslam, then Ziggler arriving to hit the Zig Zag on Kane. Rollins tosses Dolph, then side kicks Ryback in the face. However, Rowan tosses Jamie Noble in the ring, which distracts both Rollins and the ref. Ziggler hits Rollins with a side kick, Ryback follows up with a Shell Shock, and that's that. Good match.

Final Thoughts: I honestly don't have much to say here that I didn't already. Decent episode, nothing special, and it can be freely skipped without missing anything, but the matches were decent and fun.

Episode Grade: C+