Segment 1: Announcers plug the main event Fatal Four-Way to determine a new #1 Contender to Edge (uh, hey, didn't that used to be a five-man Championship Scramble?), all as Chris Jericho hits the ring for a promo. Jericho says the brand may have changed, but nothing else has: the fans are still hypocritical parasites, and he's still the best wrestler in the world and it's travesty he has to prove it again in the Fatal Four-Way rather than just being given a title shot.
 
This brings out the champ, Edge, who apparently thinks the gold bauble around his waist makes HIM the best wrestler in the world, so he has a few choice words for Jericho. HEEL DISSENSION~! But Edge and Jericho's verbal jousting doesn't last for long, as they are interrupted by a man who they can BOTH agree to hate.
 
CM Punk enters and says you two can talk all day long, but as long as he has the MitB briefcase, he's always just a referee and a three-count away from becoming champ himself. Jericho announces he's had enough of being disrespected and just leaves the ring to a shower of boos. Punk turns his attention soley to Edge, and says he has a message from GM Teddy Long: Edge will compete tonight in a non-title match... AGAINST CM PUNK! And Punk's warning him ahead of time: when he pins Edge later tonight, he's cashing in his title shot, hitting another Go To Sleep, and pinning Edge again to win the strap. Bank on it!
 
I guess these things can happen to Edge now that he's not boning the General Manager, eh? Good segment, though the live crowd was a bit less enthralled: they gave Jericho good heat, but the only babyface they chanted for the whole time Punk was talking was Cena. D'oh.
 
Segment 2: John Morrison beat Shelton Benjamin. Isn't it the AYNTK tradition to not recap squashes? Well, much to my surprise and disappointment, that's precisely what this was. Shelton took Taker to the limit a month ago, andnow can't last 3 minutes against Johnny Freaking Nitro? That's what happens when WWE gets it in their heads that Morrison simpy HAS to be a singles babyface, even though no evidence points to this being a good idea. But onward with the MegaPush, anyway!
 
Segment 3: Lo-Content Backstage Bits. Some MVP fluffery about his sudden popularity with post-menapausal harpies courtesy of appearing on The View... some Jericho bitching at Teddy Long about disrespect, only to be interrupted by The [redacted] Khali, who further disrespects Jericho... some talk of SD draft picks, but the second "Mike Knox" is presented in a way that suggestsI have to take him seriously, I zone out.
 
Segment 4: Jeff Hardy beats Chris Jericho, Rey Mysterio, and Kane in a #1 Contender's Fatal Four-Way. Kane dominated the opening minutes, but then wound up being the first eliminated when the other guys started "working together" in a manner of speaking... by this, I mean Jeff Hardy did all the heavy lifting and hit all the big moves to KO Kane, but then Jericho (just to be a dick) yanked Hardy off Kane and tossed him out of the ring, then hit a superfluous LionSault and scored the pinfall himself. Then, about 90 seconds later, Jericho got DQ'ed for using a chair against Mysterio. Whoops.
 
Hardy vs. Rey was a good fast paced closing segment, with the fans pretty solidly siding with Hardy. Lots of back-and-forth and countermoves, leading up to an extended rally for Rey. He was on the brink of victory, hitting the (619), but when he followed up with the Springboard Thesz Press, Hardy just rolled through, locked Rey to the mat, and got the left-field pinfall. New #1 Contender. Very good 20-minute match, spanning three commercial breaks.
 
Pre-Segment 5: More Backstage Bits, this time mostly focused on Jericho accusing Teddy Long of hiring incompetent people here on SD; as if to prove that, Maria bimbo's her way into the room, Teddy claims to have some bidness with her, and Jericho just throws his hands up in frustration and leaves... then  more draft talk, this time asking me to take Cryme Tyme seriously...
 
Segment 5: Cryme Tyme hosts a Dance Contest. Cryme Tyme talks about bringing some Flava to Fridays, and to prove it, their first act is going to be getting two divas to dance for us. First is Eve, who I honestly don't remember who she is or what purpose she has ever served on WWE programming. But apparently she's a babyface, because after she dances quite badly, the crowd cheers. Then comes Layla, late of snogging William Regal on RAW, who actually looks quite nice and dances about as sexily as will be permitted on a PG-rated show. I can't believe how far "Girl Carlito" has come; at least, in terms of hotness. Crowd gives Layla no love, and Eve is declared the winner. I still don't see the point of (a) hiring/highlighting women whose only skill is looking pretty and (b) trying to showcase them in Skank-Offs like this one if you're HONESTLY trying to be a TV-PG show. PG-rated titilation DOES NOT WORK, idiots. So stop trying to do it. And then, once you get used to not doing it, you'll suddenly find you have TONS more uses for the women who can get in the ring and wrestle or get on a mic and project personality and stuff like that. After two weeks of Gail Kim and Maryse being pretty awesme, a fully-clothed Girl Carlito gyrating doesn't quite cut the mustard, dammit.
 
Segment 6: MVP defeats Dolph Ziggler in a US Title Match. MVP was accompanied by a, umm, "curvacious" (euphemism alert!) black lady from "The View," who therefore gets the name "The Not-Famous Oprah." Not-Famous Oprah did have a pretty awesome Flair-caliber ring robe, but brought nothing else to the match; not even the 35-49 year-old female dipshit demographic that WWE misguided decided to go for by even trying this cross-over with The View. Meantime, while every chance is taken to try to convince us that Not-Famous Oprah's presence is meaningful, MVP gives Dolph about 2 minutes of heel beatdown, then rallies to win fairly easily in under 5 minutes. Whoopie.

Pre-Segment 7: Jericho is AGAIN bitching to Teddy Long about this, that, and the other... and AGAIN is interrupted. This time, by Johnny Nitro (who, ever the Beloved Babyface, answered Jericho's "What are you lookin' at, jerko?" with "A LOSER!"; zing?; let's just say Miz he is not). Jericho and Morrison have a little pull apart brawl, and so I guess while Jericho is NOT #1-Contending for titles, he's apparently going to join Mick Foley on the "Top Two List of My Favorite Wrestlers Who Unfathomably Want To Do Selfless Acts In Order To Get Johnny Nitro Over."
 
Segment 7: CM Punk pins Edge in a non-title match. They wasted no time hitting cruising-gear, as there were already multiple top-rope spots and brawling outside on the floor before the first ad break. Back from that, they settled in a bit, staying in the ring and going more back-and-forthy, while the announcers sold HARD (perhaps even OVERsold) the idea that even though this was a non-title match, it was also essentially two matches in one, and if Punk scored the non-title win, it was academic that he's follow up by winning the belt in a MitB InstaMatch. As they ramped up to End Game, there were 2 GTS's and 2 Spears countered effectively. Finish came when Edge was trying to suplex Punk into the ring, but Punk floated over and countered into his third try at the GTS. This one hit: he scores the win. Good 12 minute match.
 
After the Match: Punk makes sweet, sweet eye-love at the MitB Briefcase, wasting valuable time. By the time he finally goes over and grabs the case and starts gesturing (Broadly) that he might be thinking about cashing it in, however, an uninvited guest has appeared in the ring out of nowhere: UMAGA~! [Or OOmaga? Or, if you're William Regal, Yumainga?] Umaga immediately destroys Punk before any MitB Withdrawls can be made, then Umaga disappears. Edge awakes from Going To Sleep to see Punk KO'ed and his MitB Briefcase laying nearby, uncashed-in. Edge decides "What the hell?" and is going to further beat on Punk, using his own case, except that's when Jeff Hardy hits the ring for the save. Jeff hits a Twist of Fate and a Swanton to end the show, proving that defeating Edge is well within his capabilities.
 
OVERALL: Really solid show. Toss out the misguided attempted-crossover with MVP and Not-Oprah and undo the Fast-Forward on Johnny Nitro's face turn/push, and really, it's an AWESOME show with two outstanding matches, some great Roster Re-establishment in the form of Jericho and Punk's mic work and Jeff's #1 Contender win, and even a little "stunt booking surprise" in the form of Umaga's high impact return. SD's now set up to feature Edge/Jeff, Punk/Umaga, and Jericho/Morrison at the next PPV, and  not a one of those should suck if they do them up right.