Fortunately, it turns out that's NOT what they are actually doing.
 
Tonight, I was able to have two devices streaming Payback at the same time, no troubles. This is important to me, because WWE stupidly blocks any Android device (like my tablet, or a "smart stick" I got for my TV) from streaming the Network to a TV via HDMI. And even after my two years of bitching about this, they don't change it; and make no mistake, this is a CONSCIOUS DECISION at their end, as they are serving the Network from the same infrastucture that serves MLB.tv, and MLB.tv lets me HDMI my ass off.
 
So that means my main source of WWE Network is a PC in my bedroom, with the ability to also watch on my phone or tablet. Since I don't hold parties in my bedroom, that means WWE Network already prevents me from having friends over to watch PPV. If they actually blocked double log-ins, that would prevent me from having the Network running simultaneously on my tablet AND in my bedroom, so that I can eat dinner during the preshow or meander about and fetch refreshments without missing anything.

This, my friends, would be even bigger bullshit that WWE blocking HDMI-out. But my experience tonight suggests that the Network is still allowing multiple log-ins, at least if they are from the same IP address. To me, this is fair. WWE is well within their rights to snuff out password sharing, but that's way different than trying to restrict the ways a single person (or even a single household) should be lawfully allowed to access the Network.
 
Now, unlock HDMI-out on Android, you twatwaffles!
 
I digress. Here's what happened at the just-completed Payback 2016 pay-per-view:

• On the Preshow. Standard hype and fluff, with Renee Young quarterbacking the Expert Panel. But then, we got not one, but TWO matches, which bodes well for the PPV, proper. Moving a planned PPV match to the preshow leaves 6 matches (plus the McMahon Family Feud segment) to fill 3 hours... that doesn't work if they're not planning on a few 20+ minute contests.
  
  First match was Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin, originally slated for the actual PPV. Corbin dominated the 8 minute affair, but when he got cocky and started toying with Ziggler, Dolph was able to get a roll-up for a flash pin. Nothing earth-shattering, but Ziggler did a really nice job making Corbin look good. That's not nothing, as any time Corbin avoids inducing yawns, it's a victory.
  
  Then, the planned preshow match saw Kalisto defend his US Title against Ryback. Ryback gets MAJOR OO Brownie Points for a customized weightlifting belt that reads "The Preshow-Stopper" (HBK was the "Showstopper," and Ryback has been vocal about not appreciating demotion to the preshow, despite being in a title match at both WM32 and tonight). This one brushed up against 12 minutes, and featured a very RAW-like lay-out: a fast start for Kalisto, leading up to a wacky dive to the floor, an ad break while both guys were down, and then we return to see a few minutes of heel beatdown by Ryback, before Kalisto fired up (Ryback set up for a superplex, but Kalisto fought out and turned it into an awesome modified tornado DDT). Believable near falls after a flip powerbomb, after the low-rana headspike, and after Kalisto fipped out of Shellshock into a small package. Ryback countered an attempted top rope rana into a super gorilla press slam for a brief comeback... but then Ryback went up top and whiffed on a big splash. Salida del Sol, and Kalisto retains. Really good match, actually, though the US Title seems kind of lost and neglected around  the waist of a tag team wrestler.
  
  
• Cold Open. And now the PPV, proper, kicks off, live in Chicago, IL, where you can usually count on a fun and red hot crowd. Already, they were on their game for the preshow matches, and they take it up a notch when we eschew any prefatory hype, and jump straight to the New Day making a grand entrance to deafening "NEW. DAYROCKS." chants
  
  The New Day remind us that this is the final match of a tournament that has been sponsored by Booty-O's. It seems they're going to personally scout the new #1 Contenders by watching this match from ringside. They also manage to work in a reference to Beyonce's "Lemonade," with Eggsavier Woods personally offering his services, if Beyonce feels like getting even with her cheatin' man is the best way to repair their marriage, if you catch his drift.
  
  But once they wrap up, we do get the standard PPV opening video package and hype, which gives us all a few minutes to prepare our final snacks and beverages.
  
  
• Enzo/Cass vs. the Vaudevillains is thrown out by the ref, due to serious legit injury to Enzo Amore. Enzo & Big Cass get a monster pop for their entrance, and even the New Day jump up from their beanbag chairs to dance along with the music. Badda Boom, SAWFT, How You Doin'?, and so forth. In less than one month, these two have patter approaching the sing-along status of the New Age Outlaws.
  
  As the Vaudevillains make their entrance, Cole & The Gang walk us through the brackets, and how both these teams had to score major upsets (over the Dudleys and Usos, respectively) to reach the finals. Also, Cole makes sure we know that we've got both a German Announce Table and a Spanish Announce Table at ringside.
  
  Bell rings, and the Vaudevillains get the better of Enzo to start. About 90 seconds in, a tag to Cass puts an end to that happy crappy. Cass gets a major flurry, and with things seemingly in control, he turns things back over to Enzo.
  
  And then, things get scary... Enzo tried to counter a whip by doing a baseball slide to ringside, but got caught off by a half step, and he clotheslined himself against the middle rope, and then seemed to go limp and hit his head hard on the apron as his momentum carried him to the floor.
  
  It looked wrong in real time, and the ref seemed unconcerned after his first check... it was only when Simon Gotch tried to pick him up, and Enzo was out cold that the ref and Cass came over and realized that things were bad.
  
  The ref made the dreaded "X" and Cass looked really worried as trainers and medics came out. They called for a stretcher, and it became obvious that Enzo would not be leaving the ring under his own power. Slow motion replays illustrated just how sick the bump was.
  
  After a few minutes, the ref made the official call to throw out the match... but obviously, at this point, none of that matters, and we're all just hoping Enzo is OK.
  
  Cole gave us a little "the show must go on" speech, and we reset things with the lengthy Zayn/Owens video package to set up our next match.
  
  
• Kevin Owens defeats Sami Zayn. Zayn starts the match, already at 100% full speed. A flurry of fists, a suicide dive, whipping Owens into the ringside barricade, and his first near fall less than a minute in.
  
  But righteous indignation burns hot and fast, and it runs out quickly. When the match spilled outside a second time, Zayn took time to set up for a spot with the ring steps, but that gave Owens time to gather his wits and turn the tables.
  
  Per his usual M.O., Owens teased doing something awesome of his own, using the steps for a high risk spot, but instead, as the crowd started buzzing, he just kicked Zayn in the face, simple and zero-risk.
  
  Thus begins a methodical heel beatdown, with Owens using his size and power to grind away at Zayn. Of course, Zayn got plenty of hope spots (in the form of a stray inside-out clothesline, or a corner mount-and-punch), but Owens maintained the advantage for several minutes, including a brief stop-off in Chinlock City.
  
  About 6 minutes in, Zayn seemed to start a for-real fire-up, stringing together a bunch of moves and getting a believable near fall after a Blue Thunder Bomb. When Owens kicked out, Zayn sold the frustration, and against Owens had time to recover.
  
  Zayn finally tries to follow up, but Owens catches him with a fisherman's neckbreaker for a near fall. Owens up top, and nails the Frog Splash for an ultra-convincing near fall. Cannonball lands. Second Cannonball lands. Owens calls for the Pop Up Powerbomb, but Zayn counters in mid-air into a dropkick.
  
  Dragon suplex by Zayn, but Owens dodges the follow-up and hits a stiff lariat. Both men down. Ref applies a double count. Both men up at 7, as the first "THIS IS AWE SOME" chants of the night are heard.
  
  The two men trade punches, and things break in Zayn's favor... Sami goes for his run-up-the-ropes tornado DDT, but Owens catches him in mid-air and turns it into a backbreaker. Owens tries to continue the assault on Zayn's spine, with a powerbomb on the apron, but Zayn counters with a backdrop.
  
  With Owens slumped on the floor, near a ringpost, Zayn sees his opening, and hits his trademark cut-the-corner DDT. He rolls Owens into the ring, and gets him lined up for the Helluva Kick... but Owens comes out of the corner with a boot to the face and a quick shoot into the ropes. Pop Up Powerbomb, and that's all she wrote.
  
  Damned fine 15 minute match, where they seemingly got the "formula" out of the way in the first 5 minutes, and from that point on, it was all fast paced End Game. Only complaint would be that the clean win by Owens seems to preclude additional rematches.
  
  BUT WAIT~! After the match, Owens dickishly throws Zayn's carcass out of the ring, and then insists that Byron Saxton get into the ring to interview him. Owens is so over-the-top in declaring himself the indisputable winner of the Owens/Zayn feud that it almost invites additional chapters.
  
  But then, Owens says his next mission is regaining his IC Title. When Saxton tells him that the IC Title match is next, and asks for Owens' prediction, Owens says he doesn't care who wins, and then invites himself to sit in on guest commentary.
  
  DOUBLE DUTY FOR OWENS~! I love it.
  
  
• Miz pins Cesaro to retain the IC Title, but only thanks to massive chaos. Credit where it's due: Cesaro invested in v2.0 of his breakaway suit for his Bond-style entrance, and it actually looks a lot more like a real suit, rather than a prop.
  
  Bell rings, and Cesaro just puts on an absolute CLINIC of mat/chain wrestling, and also freakish athleticism and strength. However, when he sets up for his patented deadlift snatch-superplex (where Cesaro is on the second rope, but his opponent is outside, on the apron), Maryse hooks Miz's leg to block it.
  
  Miz uses that distraction to go after Cesaro's SURGICALLY REPAIRED~! shoulder, and begin his heel beatdown. Owens, on commentary, begrudgingly gives Miz credit for going after Cesaro's injury, but is otherwise burying Miz as being an unworthy champion. No honor among thieves, I guess. But mostly, Owens just takes every opportunity to eviscerate Cole, with is delightful.
  
  Miz's beatdown builds up to a resthold/alleged submission (a front facelock). Miz manages to avoid letting Cesaro get to the ropes for a break, so instead, Cesaro uses one last outburst to power out of the hold and start his comeback.
  
  The Forearm Express leaves the station, and Miz runs out of gas, so Cesaro actually does 3 or 4 extra criss-crosses on his own, just for shits and giggles. The deadlift superplex hits on the second try, getting Cesaro his first convincing near fall.
  
  A springboard, twisting forearm hits, and Cesaro calls for the Giant Swing. Miz blocks it, and tries to position himself for the SKF. Cesaro counters into the Elevation Uppercut. Miz dodges a corner charge, and Cesaro's injured shoulder rams into the steel ring post.
  
  The Skull Crushing Finale hits! But Cesaro kicks out at 2. Both men are hurting, and the ref applies a double count.... and all of a sudden the crowd erupts, and we don't know why.
  
  Oh, THAT's why! Sami Zayn has sprinted out, and cameras finally catch up just as Zayn dives over the announce table to tackle Owens. Zayn and Owens brawl all over ringside, and in the meantime, Cesaro cinches the Swing, and gets 20 full rotations, as the crowd is losing its mind. Sensory Overload!
  
  Cesaro cinches in the Sharpshooter, but that's when Owens tries to cut through the ring to escape Zayn. Zayn follows, and the ref is distracted, trying to get those two out of the ring. Miz is tapping out to the Sharpshooter, but the ref isn't paying attention.
  
  Cesaro releases the hold, and manfully evicts Owens and Zayn from the ring... but while his back is turned, Miz catches him with a cheap roll-up. Add in a handful of tights, and Miz steals the win.
  
  Very nice 15 minute match, with Miz effectively targeting Cesaro's injury for a credible mid-match beatdown, setting up an excellent final segment that seems to marry the Cesaro/Miz and Owens/Zayn feuds into one intertwined IC Title 4-way. And that, my friends, is Good Times.
  
  After the match, Cesaro got some revenge by attacking Miz until Maryse was able to pull him to safety. Owens got the better of Zayn and then laid out Cesaro, too. In his haste to get out of Dodge, Miz left the IC belt behind, and Owens posed with it to close the segment.
  
  
• Dean Ambrose defeats Chris Jericho. During ring entrances, Cole gives us a VERY heartening update on Enzo, who is at the hospital, but who was moving his extremities and talking to doctors/medics backstage before being taking the ambulance ride. Sighs of relief all around, because that really was pretty scary.
  
  We get underway with Ambrose taking the fight to Jericho. Jericho decides to bail out, and then attempts to implement the tried and true cat and mouse role reversal spot... but Ambrose has it scouted, and ducks under Jericho's initial attack to score a crossbody.
  
  Jericho dives outside again, and briefly gains the advantage. Ambrose puts an end to that with the outside-the-ring modified version of his rebound clothesline. With Jericho on his back, Ambrose even does Y2J's mocking "Yeah, Baby!" double bicep pose. Ambrose takes the fight back into the ring, but he gets greedy by attempting Dirty Deeds way too soon. Jericho fights him off; Ambrose falls back into the ropes and tries the Rebound Clothesline again. Jericho is expecting it, and flattens Ambrose with a big boot.
  
  Ambrose peppers in a few hope spots here and there, but it's all Jericho for the next several minutes. It all builds up to Jericho going for his running bulldog... but Ambrose shoves him off, and Jericho winds up crashing into the turnbuckle. Tornado DDT, and Ambrose is back into the match.
  
  First near fall for Ambrose comes off a swinging neckbreaker. Ambrose with a running bulldog of his own, for another two count. Ambrose up top, going for his standing elbow... but Jericho side steps it, drops Ambrose with a clothesline, and hooks in the Walls of Jericho.
  
  Ambrose is able to get a rope break in fairly short order, but Jericho opts to argue with the ref about it. Ooops. Ambrose side steps Jericho's follow-up charge, and Jericho tumbles to the floor.
  
  Ambrose hits a suicide dive, and then clears the German Announce Table. Recalling last Monday, Ambrose sets up for Dirty Deeds on the table, but Jericho counters, and goes for the Walls on top of the table. When Ambrose puts up a fight, Jericho changes gears, and slingshots Ambrose over into the Timekeeper Cubicle.
  
  Jericho gets in the ring, and is willing to take the count-out win. But Ambrose isn't gonna let him have it. At the count of 9, Ambrose dives into the ring. Jericho charges at him, but Ambrose lands a rebound clothesline. Ambrose up top, and the standing elbow hits. Jericho just barely kicks out at 2 and 9/10ths.
  
  Ambrose has taken quite a beating, so he's slow to follow up. When he does, he opts to set Jericho on the top rope for a superplex. Jericho fights out with headbutts, and Ambrose falls back. Jericho comes off with a double-axe, but Ambrose blocks and goes for Dirty Deeds. Jericho counters the counter, and picks an ankle and hooks up the Walls, again.
  
  This time, Ambrose can't get the easy rope break, so he flips his way into a pinning combo. Jericho kicks out, beats Ambrose to his feet, and hits an enzuigiri for a near fall. Butterfly backbreaker, but Ambrose kicks out at 2.
  
  Jericho starts verbally taunting Ambrose, instead of physically following up. Some light paintbrush slaps only serve to piss off Ambrose. Jericho appears to snuff out an Ambrose rally with a single hard back elbow, but Jericho attempts a Lionsault after that. Ambrose gets the knees up.
  
  With both men on the mat, Ambrose hooked Jericho's arms, and started pulling him up to his feet. Jericho kept fighting it, so Ambrose unleashed a flurry of knee lifts, until Jericho went limp. Dirty Deeds hits, and Ambrose is your winner.
  
  A little over 20 minutes of action. Good stuff. Ambrose with the clean win completely wipes away the memory of WM32. Well, it helps that Lesnar/Ambrose was a disappointing letdown of a match, but still: the past month has been a superb reboot for Ambrose.
  
  After the match, Ambrose didn't really celebrate. Instead, he got to watch, bemused, as Jericho pitched one of his patented hissy fits, which is usually par for the course when he's going away for another hiatus from WWE.
  
  
• Charlotte retains the Women's Title via "Chicago Screwjob" over Natalya, thanks to Charles "Little Naitch" Robinson colluding with Ric Flair. Full boxing-style ring intros for this one, and I should note that it's Joey Jo Jo Shabadoo Jr. who's doing them. She's been splitting ring announcing duties all night with Eden Stiles. In other words, no Lilian Garcia, which is, ummmmm, troubling, since WWE's Vestigial Assbone Kevin Dunn had a very public argument with Lilian at RAW tapings last week, and Lilian kind of stood up to him and made him look like an ass. Even though Dunn needs no help looking like a jackwagon, he's also Vince's #1 Suckup, and could easily use his inexplicable influence to have Lilian ousted.
  
  Nice pop for Bret "the Hitman" Hart, making his first WWE appearance since successful surgery for colon cancer. Striving to impress her uncle, Nattie comes out of the gate with a flash takedown and Sharpshooter attetmpt. Charlotte fights out of it, but she's immediately on the defensive to start. The very first time Charlotte seems to gain the upperhand, she makes the mistake of gloating, and gets a SECOND flash Sharpshooter for her troubles.
  
  Charlotte fights it off, and bails out of the ring to regroup. Nattie follows, but it turns into the cat and mouse role reversal, as Charlotte immediately takes control upon re-entering the ring.
  
  Charlotte keeps the pedal down. Over the course of several minutes, Nattie gets one neat spot where she throws a beautiful German and follows up with her Walk Over low dropkick... but Charlotte snuffs that out, and starts trying to soften up Nattie's knee, in preparation for the Figure Eight.
  
  The pendulum finally swings back to Nattie when Charlotte heads to the top rope, with designs on a moonsault... but Nattie catches her, and shoves Charlotte off the ropes. Charlotte falls all the way from the top, to the floor, landing hard. Nattie follows, and hits a head scissors takedown, before throwing Charlotte back into the ring.
  
  Nattie lines up the discus clothesline. Charlotte counters with a big boot. Charlotte tries, prematurely, for the Figure Eight, but Nattie fights out, and beats Charlotte to her feet. Discus clothesline hits on Attempt #2. Nattie once again goes for the Sharpshooter, but Charlotte fights out, and hits Natural Selection.
  
  Convincing near fall, but Nattie kicks out at 2. Charlotte sells the frustration, but eventually sets up for the moonsault. This time, it hits. But once again, Nattie kicks out at the last second. Charlotte's frustration is off the charts, now, but she is able to cinch in the Figure Four.
  
  But Nattie uses leverage to prevent Charlotte from turning it into the full Figure Eight, and eventually reverses the hold. The damage has been done, however, and Nattie's left knee is wrecked.
  
  Charlotte takes note of this, and decides to add insult to injury... Charlotte locks in the Sharpshooter, and....
  
  THE HELL???!!!!!????
  
  The ref calls for the bell, even though it's only been 2 seconds since Charlotte locked it in, and Nattie obviously has not tapped. Hey, wait, I get it. The ref is "Little Naitch" Charles Robinson, well known to be Ric Flair's buddy/mascot, and this is a complete callback to the Montreal Screwjob, where Bret never tapped, but the ref called for the bell the moment Shawn Michaels cinched a Sharpshooter.
  
  Amusing, and I absolutely love that WWE came up with a way to use Bret and Ric that NOBODY saw coming, but it still made perfect sense. Sure, Charlotte and Nattie STILL haven't had a worthy follow-up to their epic match at the first NXT Takeover, but this was rock solid, and the finish was fun.
  
  For added fun, after the match Ric got in the ring and joined Charlotte for some utterly undeserved celebration... and of course, this rubbed Bret Hart the wrong way. This led to some jawing back and forth, and by the time all was said and done, Bret had Flair in the Sharpshooter, while Nattie had Charlotte in the Sharpshooter. Neat.
  
  
• Vince McMahon's Decision Regarding Who Controls RAW is that He Doesn't Actually Decide; both Steph and Shane will continue to fight for his amusement. First to hit the ring is Vince McMahon. Per his new usual, he gets a less than rousing response, and tries to goose the crowd into giving him more, before giving up. Then, when he starts talking, he's drowned out by a "SEE EM PUNK" chant, because as good a crowd as Chicago has been, sometimes it's just fun to stick it to Vince.
  
  Once he waits that one out, Vince launches into what feels like a 90 minute monologue. In reality, it's only 4-5 minutes, but the fact that he only had about 90 seconds of material really alters your perception. The live crowd amuses themselves by WHAT?'ing him, but that doesn't really help those of us at home, how just have to sit through it all. The short version is that Vicne has overseen all kinds of different "eras" of WWE, and we're clearly on the cusp of something new, so it's time to reassess who should be in charge.
   
  Well, not really: either way, it's gonna be Another McMahon. Steph or Shane.
  
  Stephanie comes out first, and one ups her dad in terms of delivering a shockingly sparse mount of actual content in an even more shockingly lengthy period of time. It starts off well enough, because Steph has awesome heel charisma, but the fact is that she wasn't really talking TO us, she was talking AT us, with an obviously over-scripted and over-long spiel. Result: the sheer force of her heel charisma was insufficient to carry things, and the crowd was chanting "BOOOOOOORING" for the last third of her speech. The short version is that since the Authority came to power in 2012, all kinds of good things happened, like the all-time attendence record at WM32, the Diva Revolution, debuts by the Shield/Owens/Styles, and the WWE Network, so really, have the Authority been all bad?
  
  Shane's music mercifully cuts her off, and in stark contrast to his dad and sister, he gets massive cheers and a "SHANE O MAC" chant. Also "YOU STILL GOT IT." Shane takes some of Steph's comments, and turns them on their ear. The best ones were saying Steph had nothing to do with the WWE Network, because that was all Vince's idea, and those 1.8 million subscribers have access to 30 years of WWE history and maybe that trumps anyone subscribing to see what Steph and Hunter are doing with the current product... also, in regards to Steph saying Shane "walked out on WWE" 7 years ago when the "going got tough," Shane simply implies that he had certain ideas for where the company should go, and SOMEbody politically undermined him so that his ideas were marginalized. Shane didn't leave WWE: Steph and HHH iced him out (which is actually not an entirely unfair representation of things).
  
  Regardless, Shane keeps the fans riveted and on his side for his entire speech, which is mostly him imploring Vince to just take notice of what has happened in 4 short weeks. Steph ran down a huge resume of things, but that took her 3 years. Shane's already making a difference in 4 weeks. A straw poll of the audience (a replay of Monday's RAW) sees universal approval of Shane, and lusty boos for Steph.
   
  Vince has finally had enough, and tells them both to shut up. For the first time, somebody remembers WM32, where Shane lost, as Vince tells Shane that he shouldn't even be here, if not for Vince being weak and making a mistake on the night after WM32. But since Shane IS here, and since he's done a not-terrible job, Vince's decision is this....
   
  He wants blood. His words. "Blood." He wants Steph and Shane to battle for his own amusement. I guess he only has enough love for one child, and he will only love the one that "wins."
   
  As of tomorrow night, Shane and Stephanie are BOTH in control of RAW, and Vince has no idea how they will co-exist or make that work, but he's gonna sit back and LOVE watching it play out, since it should be Good TV.
   
  Play Vince's music, so he can leave, even though he actually did NOT make the decision he promised to make. Oy. He just kicked the can down the road, and the battle for power continues. It wouldn't be such a frustrating non-result, if not for the fact that the first 2/3rds of this promo were incredibly patience trying.
  
  I kind of wish they'd just lived up to the rumors of a Brand Re-Split, so that Shane could have one, and Steph the other. Keeping them on the same show, battling and bickering, just means we fans should get used to RAW punting one entire 20 minute segment every week for talky talky yapping (or a series of backstage yapping segments that add up to 20 minutes), because WWE over-estimates how entertaining McMahon vs. McMahon promos are. D'oh.
  
  Prove me wrong, WWE, prove me wrong.
  
  
• Roman Reigns retains the WWE Title via pinfall, but only after AJ Styles actually beat him TWICE (once via count-out and once via disqualification; in both cases, the match was ordered to continue). According to Cole, it's almost exactly 2 years to the day since Styles won the "IGWP" Title. I don't expect Saxton to immediately notice the error, but JBL must have exercised a TON of restraint to not immediately pounce on it and correct him.
  
  Full boxing style ring intros -- this time by Eden, so she's actually the new Lilian, while that makes Jo Jo the new Eden -- and although Reigns had a decent night on Thursday in terms of getting some cheers (he faced Miz, so it wasn't all that hard to do), he is a virtually unanimous heel here tonight. If it's anything less than 90/10 against Reigns, I'll eat a bug. And since those 10% are all little kids and misguided girls, their high pitched shrieks stand no chance against the full bodied roars of disapproval.
  
  Out of the gate, the psychology and body language is "Reigns is bigger and stronger, but Styles is quicker and smarter." As an added wrinkle, AJ is using his speed towards a very specific goal: any time he gets an opening, he just snaps off a quick kick to Roman's legs. If Roman's knees or hamstring give out, he's chopped down to size and loses the vast majority of his size/power advantage.
  
  When Reigns string together his first trio of moves in a row, AJ dives out of the ring and openly goads Reigns into following him, only to spring an equally blatant execution of the cat-and-mouse spot. Reigns is 6'6" and 280, but Styles is making him look like a mental midget.
  
  That said, all this adds up to Reigns getting good and angried up. He just flat no sells and attempted German, by going deadweight and throwing a few back elbows. An inside-out clothesline, and Reigns is in command with bullying power offense.
  
  First near fall of the match comes on a sit-out powerbomb by Reigns. Once again, Reigns looks like an idiot, however, as he comes off that first near fall, and calls for the Superman Punch. Really, Roman? Really? REEEEAAALLLLY?
  
  Obviously, AJ catches him with a kick to put an end to that happy crappy. Nice little flurry by Styles, ending with a near fall after his fireman carry neckbreaker. Styles duplicates Reigns' silly mistake by going for a Calf Crusher, even though the match is still only 7 minutes old.
  
  But I guess we're not supposed to notice the bogus False Time Dilation, and we should be taking these big moves seriously.... because Reigns actually sells it like this is a legit threat to end the match. He has to fight the good fight to get the rope break. At least (unlike the attempted Superman Punch) there was the in-match storyline of Styles attacking Reigns' leg. But still...
  
  Reigns gets the rope break, and then rolls out of the ring, thinking he's safe. But Styles gets a running start and hits a big ass plancha, which actually drives Reigns backwards and through the (English) Announce Table. Nice.
  
  Reigns is a hoss, and Styles has trouble haulting his ass back into the ring. In fact, when he finally gets Reigns ALMOST to the ring, AJ notices the ref's count is already at 8. THere is no way he'll be able to get Reigns into the ring by 10, so he's got a choice: keep struggling and get a double count-out, or dive in, and take a count-out win.
  
  Styles chooses the latter, but clearly isn't happy about it, as he wins the match, but doesn't win the title. The crowd isn't happy, either, but their disappointment is nullfied when Shane McMahon's music hits.
  
  Shane says "Screw this noise," and declares that this match must continue.
  
  It does, and AJ immediately jumpstarts things by going after Reigns and setting him up for the Springboard Forearm. Reigns evades it, but Styles quickly regains the advantage and goes up top for a 450 Splash. Reigns gets the knees up to block.
  
  Reigns looks like he's gonna line up the Superman Punch again and get the cheap win on the restart... but AJ side steps. AJ heads back to the top rope, and when he comes off, Reigns just blatantly punches him in the scrotum.
  
  The ref calls for the bell. Shane only said No Countout. So for the second time, AJ Styles appears to win the match, but not the title, this time, via DQ. But by now, the fans are catching on, and sure enough, Stephanie McMahon's music hits. Steph declares that, once again, this is an unsatisfactory outcome, and this match must continue. No Disqualifications, now.
  
  This kicks off a fairly insane closing segment, as Styles is still in bad shape after the sac punch. So Reigns just completely dominates him, and after a quick moment of misdirection with brawling out into the crowd (taking advantage of BOTH the No-Count-Out and No-DQ stips), he hits the Superman Punch. Reigns steps back, and calls for the spear....
  
  But wouldn't you know it? Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson show up, and yank Styles out of the ring. Man, that No DQ stip came in handy, didn't it?
  
  Gallows and Anderson throw in a bonus beatdown on Reigns, ending with their double team Boot o' Doom. They exit the ring and begin cheerleading for Styles to regain his senses and capitalize... and he does, in a big way!
  
  AJ surveys the scene, heads out to the apron, and sets up for the Phenomenal Forearm.... and he lands it! Styles with the cover, hooking the near leg! One... two.... Reigns gets the far leg draped over the bottom rope at the very last second. Whoa, even *I* bit on that one.
  
  Gallows and Anderson sense that they might have to get involved again.... but before they can, the Usos hit the ring and counteract them. Their big ass brawl at ringside results in a scrum at the foot of the aisle. Styles heads to the top rope of the "northwest" corner (top left of the screen), but gets caught. Reigns shoves him off, and Styles falls directly onto the four-man scrum.
  
  Reigns sees this, and is embiggened. Deep down, he wants us to like him. So he finally pumps himself up, and gets a running start, and hits a crazy no-hands plancha onto the pile. Notably: at the last second, Styles got OFF the pile, to safety.
  
  As a result, as Reigns extricated himself from said pile, AJ was already out in the crowd, and lined up to hit a Phenomenal Forearm, using the barricade. This time, he has zero trouble hoisting Reign's carcass into the ring.
  
  After another flurry of kicks, Reigns is on his back, and Styles heads outside, realizing he needs to up his game. Foreget the forearm.... Styles hits a perfect Springboard 450 Splash! But unbelievably, Reigns kicks out at the last second.
  
  AJ goes for the Styles Clash, but obviously, the dog won't hunt, monsignor. Reigns is just too big and heavy for Styles to get close to landing it. Reigns dumps AJ to the apron, and tries a Superman Punch, but AJ clotheslines his neck over the top rope.
  
  Reigns stumbles backware, and Styles sees his chance. He springboards and goes for the forearm, but Reigns ducks.... Styles adjusts, lands on his feet, and his momentum takes him into the ropes. He rebounds off the ropes, and....
  
  SPEAR~! Reigns drags himself into the cover. One. Two. Three. Boo.
  
  Boo. But also: what a Crazy Go Nuts match. The horseshit time dilation at the start was just confounding and threatened to take you out of the match, just because of how distractingly obvious it was. But then, you sort of "got it" as the match morphed into a de facto Best of Three Falls Match.
  
  And the best part is, AJ STYLES JUST BEAT ROMAN REIGNS 2 FALLS TO 1. Granted, the only fall that mattered was won by Reigns, but with the DQ and COR falls in his favor, Styles unexpectedly comes out of this match smelling like a dozen roses, and in GREAT shape for a nutty stipulation match at the upcoming Extreme Rules PPV.
  
  Granted, they kind of treaded water in terms of faction formation and and changes in heel/face alignment, but holy christ, how much more aggressive over-booking can you reasonable squeeze into a single match.
  
  That was a gloriously insane 25 minute Sports Entertainment Spectacle, and the fact that there was actually one near fall where I really believed Styles was about to win (the Reigns foot-on-the-rope one) speaks volumes about how they laid it out. I'm a guy who understands how good Styles is, but I also think he is a Black Hole of Gravitas due to his promo style (OK, I admit it: mostly because "soft spoken redneck" is hard for northern ears to take seriously, and anytime AJ does try to act pissed off, it's more cute than credible)... but in this case, the writers are putting him in a top spot, and the agents/producers are putting together the match layouts that completely highlight his strengths to a degree that you forget about those weaknesses. Outstanding.
  
  Reigns gets to celebrate his win, but he's clearly shooting a Skunk Eye at Styles, due to the fact that this was anything but the easy/decisive win that Roman was expecting. However, this is NOT the final visual of the night....
  
  Instead, we cut backstage, where Vince, Shane, and Steph are all watching a monitor. They all agree that was one hell of a main event, and Vince congratulates them both on making sure the fans got their money's worth. But now that Roman's won, what next? Steph thinks Styles has probably earned a rematch, and meanders into a mention that Extreme Rules is in 3 weeks. Shane pounces immediately, and says that's EXACTLY what he was thinking. Not just a rematch, but an Extreme Rules Match. No DQ, no count-out, anything goes.
  
  Vince signs off on this, and Steph sarcastically "agrees" with Shane, even though he basically just jumped in and stole her thunder. A testy little staredown between Shane and Steph is our ACTUAL final visual as we fade to black.
  

And so ends the show. I have a hard time mustering up any significant complaints, other than the McMahon Segment, which seriously over-promised but under-delivered. Vince and Steph really milked the he-goat, and at the end of it all, Shane and Steph are still jockeying for control. In other words, it took 20 minutes to basically put us right back where we starts.
 
Oh, and also: that whole thing with Enzo sucks, but that's not exactly something where there's blame to assign. It was a freak accident. On the upside, as of this writing, Enzo is out of the hospital. He does have a confirmed concussion (as I expected, the initial whiplash against the middle rope was just enough to throw Enzo off, and it was the subsequent braining, where his head hit the apron, that did the damage), but is already out of the hospital, with tests revealing no structural damage. Can I once again get a communal sigh of relief? I knew I could.
 
The main event had an auspicious start, but by the end, it massively over-delivered, and made AJ look like a million bucks without hamstringing Reigns.
 
For my money, Kevin Owens pulling double duty is never not gonna be awesome. Using him as the lynchpin to tie together two feuds, for a 4-way IC Title feud is just simple, old school wrestling storytelling, in the style of Heyman's ECW. Segments that blend together seamlessly like that are a thing of beauty, and WWE has turned it into a rarity since the implementation of the Hollywood Writer Monkey System.
 
Ambrose/Jericho was just plain good, and a necessary reboot for Ambrose after he got wasted at WM32; this feud was always the plan once Jericho came back (the two even planted the seeds way back in Jericho's October cameo), but they got sidetracked when injuries shook up the WM card. Now, they still got to where they wanted to go, and it was a lot of good stuff crammed into the past 4 weeks to make it happen.
 
And Charlotte/Nattie was fun, and a fresh and unexpected take on the Montreal Screwjob. For tonight, that's plenty, but as much as the "Styles beat Reigns 2 falls to 1" and the "Owens/Zayn crossover into Cesaro/Miz" things, THIS demands some serious explanation/follow-up tomorrow on RAW. Li'l Naitch can't just keep his job after that, can he? Given Flair's drunken escapades last week, could this be a deal where Ric fades away, and Robinson takes over as Charlottes designated cheater? Or am I just thinking too hard, and they just brush everything over the rug with a rematch (which Charlotte wins)? We'll see.
 
OO is very happy with tonight's Payback. I've already given a ton of free passes to the whole "Who's in control of RAW" deal, so I'm not gonna turn into a stickler now (even if tonight's segment was lame).... overall, that means an easy A-minus final grade for Payback 2016.
 
See you in 24 hours, kids!