And now, the Survivor Series, which promises to be pretty outstanding, if for no other reason than because WWE made it free to any fan with access to the WWE Network, and knows they have to deliver the goods in front of their biggest PPV audience in history.
 
I'm pretty sure they won't shit the bed.
 
Pretty sure. Prove me right, WWE!
 
On that optimisitic note, here's what happened at the just-completed Survivor Series 2014 free-per-view:

• ON THE PRESHOW. Another month, another preshow that amounted to 10 minutes of content served up in a 60 minute bag.
  
  Fandango's reboot was the lone real noteworthy item. He's ditched his theme music, and adopted a less flamboyant demeanor. His new valet is Rosa, and she handled 90% of the dancing, while Fandango focused on kicking Justin Gabriel's ass in a 3 minute squash. It'll be interesting to see how this plays out; on one hand, Fandango's ditched his most marketable hook, but on the other, he wasn't exactly going anywhere with said hook.
  
  An unannounced match also took place when Cesaro came out to voice his support for Team Authority. Jack Swagger (who had originally offered to join Team Cena) came out, and after a pro-Cena monologue by Zeb Colter, the two hooked up. Swagger won a forgettable five minute match, so I guess by proxy, that's a victory for Team Cena. Or something.
  
  Wade Barrett's appearance did not include any mention of his planned return to the ring. Instead, he just hyped the main event and played "Cover Your Ass" by delivering Bad News for both Team Cena and Team Authority.
  
  Paul Heyman was also on hand, but only participated as a member of the Expert Panel, and not as the advocate for Brock Lesnar.
  
  The rest was just talking heads and worthless filler (Miz and AJ did little backstage promos that underscored existing elements, but added nothing), which might have value if you're somebody who still needs to be sold on the show. But as somebody who's already signed up and ready for the show, I can't help but feel like I just bought a ticket for a movie and then had to sit through 50 minutes of trailers for the same damned movie.
  
  The final image of the preshow was Vince McMahon arriving in a limo to witness the game changing PPV in person.
  
  
• OPENING HYPE/THEME/ETC. And we're live in St. Louis, MO. Cole & The Gang welcome us to the show, but then have to shut the hell up, because Vince McMahon also wants to address us...
  
  
• JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR. Vince says people toss the word "epic" around a lot, these days. But make no mistake, that label absolutely DOES apply here tonight.
  
  Then he says he wants to talk to his daughter and son-in-law, so he calls Triple H and Stephanie to the ring. They're all smiles, and act all chummy and friendly with Vince, even though he's the one who put their jobs on the line. In fact, they go over the top calling for the fans to cheer for Vince.
  
  Vince sees through it and says "enough of this crap" and calls for John Cena to join them in the ring. Cena obliges.
  
  And OK, so I'm not a stickler about video quality or anything, but this whole "Free November" thing is apparently straining WWE's video stream. I've already had a half-dozen stutters (about 5-8 seconds each), and stretches where the quality is less-than-HD. If this doesn't get better, I'm gonna be awfully salty. A half-dozen hiccups in 10 minutes is NOT an acceptable level of stuttering.
  
  Cena gets to the ring, and Vince addresses both sides. He wants to make sure everybody understands what's on the line. If the Authority lose, they're out of power. And if Cena loses, all his teammates are fired.
  
  Everybody gets it. So HHH takes a mic and starts railing Cena about how he's gonna cost four good men their jobs, and how can he live with himself, knowing that he (Cena) is safe, not putting anything at risk. Cena just stands there and soaks it in, looking vaguely conflicted, but far from broken up about it.
  
  Then Steph horns in and says that even if the unthinkable happens, sure the Authority may not be on TV every week, running RAW. But they'll still be up at Titan Towers, pulling the strings from afar, so Cena's gambit is even dumber as a result.
  
  Vince coughs meaningfully, and says, "Uh, no." It turns out that he's written up tonight's contract to specifically forbid HHH and Stephanie from ever making decisions that affect the lives and careers of our Superstars. They can keep desk jobs, and do accounting and marketing, but they are truly out of power.
  
  In fact, he's put a special clause into the contract that there's only one way they can EVER come back into that power: one man has the ability to give them the power back. Stephanie assumes it's Vince, and kisses up to him some more. But it's not Vince.
  
  The only man capable of bringing the Authority back to power is.... John Cena.
  
  HHH and Steph are clearly upset, but Vince spins it like he has so much faith in them that this declaration probably won't even come into play, and walks away after the vote of (faux) confidence.
  
  But Cena decides to pile on with a shouty salt-in-the-wound promo in which he promises that that Authority. Will. Lose.
  
  
• DAMIEN SANDOW AND MIZ ARE THE NEW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS AFTER A FOUR-WAY MATCH AGAINST THE DUST BROTHERS, THE USOS, AND LOS MATADORES. Stardust (sporting another new look, including a lot of red) starts against one of the Matadores. Stardust gets the better of it, but Miz blind tags himself in, and pretty much starts getting his ass kicked, because that's the kind of doofus he is. Sandow gets huge cheers and chants when he starts mirroring all Miz's bumps.
  
  As soon as Miz gains control, he does his now-standard Dick Move of teasing that he's gonna tag Sandow in (YAY!) only to not do so (BOO!). Another quick exchange, and an Uso blind tags himself into the match, so Miz exits.
  
  Uso vs. Matadore ends when Stardust blind tags himself in, then lowbridges the Matadore, and enters the ring to attack the Uso. Stardust and Goldust cut the ring in half, and start executing frequent tags to dominate said Uso.
  
  The fans, rather than rally behind the Uso, start chanting again for Sandow. So Stardust borrows Miz's Dick Move, and teases that he'll tag Sandow... but when he gets in trouble, he tags Miz in, instead. Uso tags in a Matadore, so it's two fresh men.
  
  Miz actually stays on offense for a bit, requiring an Uso to come in and make the save for the Matadore. Miz finally decides to tag Sandow in... and as Sandow sets up for a charge, he backs towards the Dust Brothers' corner, and Goldust blind tags himself in. BOO!
  
  More frequent tags by the champs, as they isolate on the Matadore for a bit. Again, the fans respond to this by chanting for Mizdow.
  
  When the Matadore finally gets separation, he is proximate to the Usos' corner, and has to tag Jimmy. Goldust comes in on the corresponding move. The Usos light things up, and when a Pier Seven Brawl breaks out (Mizdow again failed to participate because he was too busy mirroring Miz's bump), they clear the ring.
  
  Highspots ahoy, as the Usos hit Stereo Planchas onto Goldust and Miz. Then Stardust responds by hitting the Falling Star onto the Usos. Then one Matadore takes out Mizdow and Stardust.
  
  The other Matadore heads up to the top rope planning to jump onto the scrum, but Goldust catches him. They jockey for position, while another Matadore and Stardust join in for a quadruple-stack Tower of Doom. Wow. Goldust takes the worst of it.
  
  The legal Uso piles on by hitting a Superfly Splash onto Goldust, but as he's leaping off the top rope, Miz blind tags himself in... Miz chucks Uso out of the ring, but before he can make the cover, Sandow finally takes the initiative and blind tags HIMself in.
  
  Miz looks on in annoyance as Sandow covers Goldust, and the ref counts three. New champs after a very entertaining 20 minute match.
  
  Or maybe it was 15 minutes, but it just seemed like 20 because of all the goddamned lagging/stuttering slowing things down... seriously, WWE, this  is not good. And running a few  diagnositics, I can confirm that my router/wi-fi is running flawlessly, and I'm getting full  bandwidth from Time Warner, too. I mean, I curse all you freeloaders, but seriously, how do you not plan for this, WWE?
  
  Meantime, the new champs are having fun celebrating. By which I mean: Miz grabs both titles and celebrates. Any time he holds them up, the crowd boos massively. But when Mizdow mirrors the gesture (with no belts), the crowd cheers massively. Good times.
  
  
• BACKSTAGE. Adam Rose and the Bunny are playing with WWE action figures. Then Slator Gator interrupt. There's some trash talking, and in the end, Adam Rose issues a challenge, and it is accepted... later tonight, it's Rose and the Bunny vs. Slater Gator.
  
  
• TEAM GOOD GIRLS (NAOMI, NATALYA, EMMA, AND ALICIA) BEAT TEAM BAD GIRLS (PAIGE, LAYLA, SUMMER, AND CAMERON) VIA CLEAN SWEEP IN AN ELIMINATION MATCH. Nattie's accompanied by Tyson Kidd, who immediately gets a "Nattie's Husband" chant. Heels dominate early, picking mostly on Emma. This lasts a good 3-4 minutes, and so the fans entertain themselves by once again chanting "We Want Mizdow!" Heh.
  
  Finally, a big tag to Naomi, who hits her finisher on Cameron after about 30 seconds, but the heels storm the ring to make the save. Pier Eight brawl, ends with Cameron finally getting pinned by Naomi after a quick roll-up. 4-on-3, Team Nattie.
  
  A few tags on both sides, and Alicia Fox winds up in the ring, taking out all three opposing women with a crossbody, and striking fear into them. Summer tags out first chance she gets, and Layla tries her luck. She gets pinned after a backbreaker. 4-on-2, Team Nattie.
  
  Summer Rae in again, and pretty much gets her ass kicked until Paige manages a sneak attack behind the ref's back. The advantage is short-lived, when Summer decides to pose/taunt, rather than continue attacking.
  
  This upsets Paige, who calls Summer an "idiot," and chucks her back into the ring while she's still woozy. Emma polishes her off with the EmmaLock. 4-on-1, Team Nattie.
  
  Paige is left alone, and the fans actually rally behind her, chanting "Let's Go Paige." Paige tries to walk out, but Emma cuts her off (and actually gets booed for it).
  
  Paige fights the good fight, landing a wicked stiff kick on Nattie, and countering a moonsault by Naomi, but in the end, it's for naught. Naomi gets to do the honors, scoring her second elimination to finalize the clean sweep.
  
  The women celebrate by dancing to Naomi's music, because pretty ladies bouncing and grinding on one another will never not be outstanding.. Oh, and Tyson Kidd joins in, because he's an assface. Probably about 12 minutes or so, and a bit slow to start, but definitely solid by the end... I wish they'd inverted the timetable, and given more time to Paige/Nattie/Naomi at the end, and less to the slower opening segment. But whatever, I'll take it.
  
  
• BRAY WYATT WINS THE MATCH, VIA DISQUALIFICATION, BUT DEAN AMBROSE CLEARLY WINS THE WAR. As soon as the bell rings, these two cannot restrain themselves... the fly at each other, fists a-flyin'. Ambrose seems to be winning the fight, but Wyatt's bag of tricks keeps things pretty even (these include using the ref's 5-count in a corner to his advantage, and luring Ambrose outside the ring for some cat-and-mouse-role-reversal action). But the vibe definitely seems to be that Ambrose is winning the "honest" part of the fight.
  
  That finally changes when Ambrose decides to hit a plancha, but Wyatt catches him in mid-air with an uppercut. Then, he introduces Ambrose to the steel ringsteps, and returns things to the center of the ring for his first sustained offensive.
  
  First near fall of the match is by Bray, after a running senton.
  
  Wyatt's offensive continues for a bit until Ambrose gets dumped outside, and Bray tries to catch him with a running clothesline... but Ambrose runs at Wyatt with a clothesline of his own, and they take each other out. The ref applies a double count, but both men finally get back into the ring at 9.
  
  Ambrose wins the ensuing exchange, getting his first near fall off a bulldog, and then mocking Bray's upside-down-turnbuckle-hang. Nice double-reversey spot sees Wyatt try a Sister Abigail, only to have it countered. The Ambrose flurry continues, until he goes up to the top rope...
  
  Wyatt catches him, and they trade fists. Bray seems to set up for a superplex, but Ambrose punches out. Ambrose tries a flying double-axe, but Wyatt blocks it, and Ambrose falls back into the rope... he tries his Rebound Clothesline, only to walk into a Rock Bottom by Wyatt.
  
  Flurry by Wyatt ends when he whiffs on a second rope senton. Another grapple, and this time Ambrose gets his rebound clothesline. Follows up with a top rope elbow for a two count.
  
  Ambrose seems to be going for another running bulldog, but Bray just clotheslines him out of his fricking boots. Vicious. But Ambrose tumbles outside to avoid a cover.
  
  Bad idea, since Wyatt just follows, and slams Ambrose onto the steel steps. Tosses Ambrose back into the ring, but only gets a two count when he goes for the cover. Suddenly, Bray looks conflicted.
  
  He goes outside and grabs a mic. "Why are you doing this? It didn't have to be like this. Me and you, we're different. We're special. So I'm sorry, but I have to do this. Truly, I am sorry, but you chose this path." Uh oh.
  
  He drops Ambrose with a right hand, then goes outside to fetch a few steel chairs, and throw them into the ring.
  
  But when Wyatt dives in to grab one of the chairs, the ref has kicked all but one out of the ring. And Ambrose has grabbed the other. Uh oh, again.
  
  The ref tries to talk sense to Ambrose, saying if Ambrose uses the chair, it's an instant DQ. Wyatt seems less concerned, almost like he'll score a moral victory if Ambrose stoops to the same depths that he (Wyatt) was going to stoop.
  
  Ambrose does not care about such nonsense. He just wants to kick Wyatt's ass. So he swings the chair.
  
  The bell rings, and Wyatt's your winner via DQ after 15 minutes.
  
  But we're not done here, yet. Ambrose keeps on kicking Wyatt's ass, and then goes outside for a table. He lays Wyatt out on the table, and drops a top rope elbow on him.
  
  Then, he goes outside for another table, and about a dozen more chairs. Oh, and a ladder. Did someone say "TLC is next month's PPV?" No? Well, I just did.
  
  FYI, it's one of the super-tall Crazy Jeff Hardy ladders. But apparently, Ambrose isn't actually planning on using it... he piles all the tables and chairs onto Bray's carcass, and then climbs on top of the ladder.
  
  At which point, his music plays, and he acts like he got the moral victory. D'oh. I guess that really was just a blatant tease for TLC, then, not building up to a signature spot to make-up for the cheap DQ ending.
  
  I guess I'll live. That match was hard hitting and intense up till the cheap finish, and if the upshot is that they'll do it again in 3 weeks, with props, I suspect no one will complain. Well, not me, anyway.
  
  
• BACKSTAGE. HHH has assembled the entire extended Team Authority, and he delivers a huge pep talk, where the thesis is those who'll benefit when they win won't be the Authority. It'll be them. Steph tries to chime in, but sort of has a nervous breakdown, and starts half-crying about how they can't lose. HHH pulls her back, and continues his more confident pep talk, but ends it with a threat: if they DON'T take care of business tonight, they might not be fired, but he'll find some way to make them wish they were. But then he gets them all back on the same page, and they all chant "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" to close the segment.
  
  Also, the camera pulls back too far, and reveals that Rusev is wearing flip flops. And suddenly, I find it a lot harder to take him seriously.
  
  
• THE BUNNY & ADAM ROSE DEFEAT SLATER GATOR. During ring entrances, the Bunny wants to do the trust fall, but Rose stops him, declaring Gimmick Infringement, and does it himself.
  
  The Bunny insists on starting, and Rose appears to let him. But he's just doing his own version of Miz's Dick Move, as he blind tags himself into the match as soon as the Bunny turns its back.
  
  Rose's attempt at being the alpha male backfires, and he winds up getting his ass kicked, post haste. So about 2 minutes in, he's forced to tag the Bunny back into the match.
  
  The Bunny is a house o' fire, and cleans house on Slater and O'Neil. Rose immediately starts calling to be tagged back in, but the Bunny instead hits a Missile Dropkick and scores the pin, itself.
  
  Then, when the music hits, the Bunny does the Trust Fall, and leaves with the entire Menagerie of Hipster Wangnozzles. Rose is left alone in the ring, looking rather pissy.
  
  
• POINTLESS INTERLUDE. Cole & The Gang are all standing, with house mics. Cole says he's so happy to welcome Roman Reigns back to WWE... the crowd goes nuts, until Roman shows up on the TitanTron. Boo! St. Louis no likely "via satellite."
  
  Reigns says his recovery is going well... and in fact, he says his time table is this: "In a month, John Cena's team might be out. Or the Authority might be out. But I'll be back." So TLC or shortly thereafter, I guess. But man, Reigns really should probably talk less. He seems like a guy reading lines, not a guy being a guy.
  
  
• BACKSTAGE. Ziggler, Ryback, Show, and Rowan are talking about their futures. Well, Ziggler, Ryback, and Show are. Rowan's sitting in his own corner, doing a Rubik's Cube. In walks Cena, who wants to do his own pep talk about how he knows they're putting everything on the line for him.
  
  But they cut him off, and all say that they're not doing this for him. They're doing it because it's the right thing to do. Cena loves it, and says that means there's just one thing to do...
  
  At which point Rowan stands up and says, "Win." Yep, just what they all had in mind.
  
  
• NIKKI BELLA BEATS AJ LEE TO WIN THE WOMENS TITLE. Full boxing-style ring intros, but then the match lasts 18 seconds. Brie distracts AJ by standing on the apron with the title belt, and as soon as AJ strays too close, Brie pulls her in and gives her a big smooch.
  
  When AJ finally extricates herself, she turns around and walks into a forearm shiver from Nikki. Then, a Rack Attack, and it's all over.
  
  And Brie is all smiles. So is Brie evil? Probably not. This is actually Day 29 of 30 (tomorrow is her last night as Nikki's slave), so I suspect the "big" reveal will be that Brie finally decided the best way to get revenge on Nikki is to beat her for the women's title, so she willingly helped Nikki tonight, only to reveal her real agenda next week.
  
  And somehow, I bet WWE acts surprised when fans boo the shit out of this, because they like AJ better than E Network Belladrama. Oy.
  
  
• IT'S OFFICIAL. Cole & the Gange have a special announcement: Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt in a TLC Match is happening in 3 weeks at TLC. WHAT A SURPRISE~! But I guess it's a good promotional ploy... actually hyping the next PPV (which isn't free) while you have an audience full of freeloaders is your best bet to turn some of them into paying customers.
  
  
• TEAM CENA (CENA/ZIGGLER/RYBACK/SHOW/ROWAN) VANQUISH TEAM AUTHORITY (ROLLINS/KANE/RUSEV/HARPER/HENRY) WHEN ZIGGLER IS THE SOLE SURVIVOR, AFTER STING DEBUTS. So here we go... and the deck seems stacked against Team Cena. Not only did Triple H and Steph get their own entrance so they could join their team, but per usual, Seth Rollins is backed by the New Stooges. So really, that's an 8-man team (and a 10-person team if Steph and/or Lana get involved at all).
  
  By the time everybody's present and accounted for, and the bell rings, it's 10:20pm (eastern), so the show's not nearly as light as you may have guessed given the as-announced 5-match card. They won't need more than 30-minutes out of these guys. [Of note: Harper got to keep the entrance theme, and Rowan got a new one. It's kind of a throwback to the Funky Death Marches of the late 90s, but with hints of banjo.]
  
  Big Show opts to start, so Mark Henry wants to start. For a final boost of confidence, Henry goes brow-to-brow with HHH for a pep talk. And then Henry turns around and storms Big Show.
  
  And walks into a WMD. Knockout. Henry is eliminated. 5-to-4, advantage Team Cena.
  
  "Captain" Rollins decides to step up and reinvigorate the troops, but it doesn't go well. Show levels him with a single giant chop, and Rollins backs into his corner, and tags Kane in.
  
  Show drags Kane to their corner, and in comes Captain Cena. He gets the better of Kane for a bit, until Kane manages to get separation and tags in Harper.
  
  Cena immediately tags in Rowan, wanting to see brother vs. brother. Rollins does NOT want to see that, however, and blind tags himself in. Dumb idea. Rowan decimates Rollins for a bit, and then decides to let Ryback have some fun, too.
  
  Harper blind tags in, but his sneak attack backfires. Ryback continues strong, so Harper tags in Kane. Ryback keeps rolling. Kane has no choice but to tag in Rusev.
  
  And Rusev has not yet been pinned or made to submit, so there's actually some tension, all of a sudden. But Ryback doesn't want to deal with tension. He flattens Rusev with the Meathook. And he sets up for the Shellshock...
  
  But then the rest of Team Authority swarms for the save, and a Pier Nine Brawl breaks out. The ref is distracted, and Rollins catches Ryback with a Curb Stomp. Rusev follows up with his stiff-ass thrust kick. 4-to-4, all even.
  
  Show steps back in to face off with his old foe, Rusev. Back and forth for a bit, then when Show starts to dominate, Rusev tags in Harper.
  
  Harper turns the tide, and then tags in Rollins. Rollins keeps the pedal down, and we begin a sequence of rapid tags and standard tag tactics.
  
  With Show as Face in Peril, the crowd realizes that one guy has not yet been tagged in... they start chanting "We Want Ziggler."
  
  As soon as Show has a chance, he gives them what they want.
  
  Ziggler is en feugo for a bit, until Harper catches him with a Sidewalk Slam. Straight back to the heel beatdown, with frequent tags. And Ziggler is eminently qualified at faceinperilry.
  
  He bumps all over the place, generating sympathy and making his opponents look like a million bucks. "Let's Go, Ziggler" chants abound.
  
  The Passion of the Dolph continues for a good 5 minutes of brutality before he finally manages to hit a big implant DDT on Rusev. Another big brawl breaks out when Harper comes in to break up Ziggler's potential tag.
  
  The upshot of all that is Rusev powerbombing Ziggler onto a pile that had taken shape out on the floor. Neat.
  
  Then, Rusev starts setting up for an announce table spot. He clears the Spanish Announce Table, and then fetches Dolph. Rusev lays Dolph out on the Spanish Announce Table, and then gets a running start on the English Announce Table... and he goes for a Big Splash.
  
  Ziggler moves. Rusev eats table.
  
  Because of the previous powerbomb, the entire pile of other 6 guys is down and out. Ziggler manages to beat the ref's count, but by the time HHH and the Stooges realize they need to help Rusev back into the ring, it's too late. Count out. 4-to-3, advantage, Team Cena.
  
  Ziggler's still vulnerable as Kane comes into the ring to restart the action, but Dolph's able to make a quick tag to Cena. He hits a flash F-U to Kane, but then Rollins sneaks in from behind and hits a Curb Stomp on Cena. So both legal men are down.
  
  Ref applies a count, but both men roll to their corners and make tags. Harper is in. Rowan is in. The two former quasi-brothers finally lock up.
  
  Rowan gets the better of it to start, getting a near fall off a spin kick. But then Kane creates a distration, and Rollins hits a drive-by flying knee. Harper hits his wicked lariat, and makes the pin. 3-to-3, even up, again.
  
  Show's the last man standing for his team, and seems to  be stepping up (Cena's still woozy from the Curb Stomp, and Ziggler had his ass handed to him for 10 damn minutes)... but then Show looks around and sees what the score is. It might as well be 3-on-1.
  
  So Show turns around and hits the KO Punch on Cena. Oh oh. Kane makes a cover, and Cena is eliminated. 3-to-2, Advantage to Team Authority.
  
  Show goes over and offers his hand to HHH. HHH accepts. It seems Show wasn't willing to get fired, once the chips were down. Show walks out, and though the ref never counts, Cole tells us that he's "eliminated." So, uhhhh, if we take Cole's word for it, it's 3-to-1.
  
  And that 1 is Dolph Ziggler, who -- as you might recall -- had his ass handed to him for 10 solid minutes. And now, for a few minutes more.
  
  Team Authority start toying with him, mocking and taunting as much as they are delivering an ass-kicking. The crowd fires up a "RAN DEE ORE TON" chant, because word got out that WWE flew their hometown boy in from New Mexico (where he's filming his movie) to be at the show. [Or, given the weekend's other big rumor, maybe it was "WE WANT BOR DEN." He said, slyly.]
  
  But first, Dolph wants to fight the good fight, so he avoids Kane's flying clothesline, and hits a flash Zig Zag. He gets the pin. 2-to-1, Team Authority.
  
  But Harper pounces, and hits a big boot on Dolph. He gets a couple of near falls, but can't put Ziggler away, either. Harper freaks out after Ziggler kicks otu of a powerbomb, and wastes time arguing with the ref, rather than following up.
  
  As a result, as soon as Harper turns back to Ziggler, he gets caught with a small package roll-up. It's down to Ziggler vs. Rollins.
  
  HHH is livid, and Steph is nervous... but Rollins puts the boots to Ziggler, and reasserts his advantage.
  
  Mid-beatdown, Ziggler hits another schoolboy, but Rollins kicks out. Dolph follows up with a huge DDT. But Rollins kicks out.
  
  After a quick exchange, Rollins hits his turnbucklebomb, for a near fall of his own. But Ziggler's not staying down for anything, at this point.
  
  Rollins goes up top. Ziggler catches him. But Rollins shoves him off, and goes for a top rope curb stomp.
  
  Ziggler dodges, and comes back with a Fameasser. Rollins kicks out at two. The crowd finally realizes "This is awesome."
  
  Ziggler goes for a Zig Zag, but Rollins holds onto the ropes. But after some double reversey, Ziggler hits it. Zig Zag! Makes the cover!
  
  And HHH reaches in and pulls the ref out of the ring.
  
  The Stooges strike. They can't keep Ziggler down, though, and he eventually superkicks both of them into next week. In the process, one of them crashes out onto Steph, taking her out of the picture, too.
  
  Rollins tries to take advantage of the distraction by attacking from behind, but Ziggler catches him with another Zig Zag.
  
  A second ref runs out, and starts counting... and HHH comes in and breaks it up, stomping Ziggler, and chucking the ref out of the ring.
  
  A beatdown on Ziggler ends with a Pedigree, and HHH calls for another ref... out comes Scott Armstrong, known as being a pawn of HHH.
  
  But before he can count, thunder strikes, and the lights go out. And a crow calls out.
  
  And then some unfamiliar music starts, but the imagery on the TitanTron erases all uncertainty...
  
  It's Sting.
  
  In his full latter-day black and white get-up (but missing a baseball bat), he comes out on the stage and heads towards the ring.
  
  Sting knocks out Armstrong with a single punch, and then stares down HHH. At first, HHH is in awe. But then, he nuts up, emoting a sense of "You? Really? You? Who do you think you are?"
  
  He talks himself into throwing a punch at Sting.
  
  This does not end well. Sting ducks, and after a flurry of punches, hits a Scorpion Death Drop on HHH.
  
  Then, he goes over and drags Dolph Ziggler onto Seth Rollins' carcass. The original ref picks that moment to come around, and he counts to three.
  
  After a 30-minute match and then 12 more minutes of end game angle, Team Ziggler wins, and the Authority is vanquished after Sting makes his WWE debut.
  
  Ziggler gets to enjoy the moment for a bit, then Cena joins him for the last part. Finally, after they're gone, both Steph and HHH come to at about the same time, and start looking around, confused. Then they realize they're done.
  
  The audience helps with the "Na na na nah" song. Then, once HHH and Steph register that they understand, the crowd just mocks them with a big "YES! YES! YES!" chant. Because we remember you and miss you, Daniel Bryan.
  
  Steph puts her hands over her ears and trolls the crowd by pretending she totally can't hear, them, but she totally can, and who doesn't take joy in Stephanie's misery?
  
  When it switches over to a "You Got Fired" chant, Steph can't pretend anymore, and throws a full-on tantrum. Triple H is trying to calm her down in front of a very happy crowd, as we fade to black....
  

And so ends the show... and it REALLY ends, too. WWE had been hyping a special post-show interview with Vince, but the PPV wound up running long, so apparently they scrapped that, and went straight to the replay.

And as ending's go, I'll be the markiest mark on the internet and admit that I found it satisfying.

Yes, there are a billion logic holes to point out, any and most of which could have been fixed with even a modicum of thought/creativity. I mean, just having Sting come down from the rafters after a black-out fixes a lot of them; him showing up, entering from backstage with full music and light show really is stupid beyond all belief.

But in the end, who's gonna remember that part?

In the end, WWE told its story clumsily, but we all still understood it with clarity. And it's pretty fun.

However it happened, Dolph Ziggler was just the Sole Survivor of one of the most important Survivor Series matches in history, and now we get to look forward to (hopefully) a fresh direction in terms of the on-screen product.

I mean, the Authority is just a gimmick and this is no more the start of a genuine "new era" than any other GM change in history... but man alive, did you realize HHH/Steph have been in charge for 16 months? That's a long time, and I could go for a change.

Granted, ever since I mentioned it on the Forums several days ago, I probably won't be satisfied unless the new boss is Shane McMahon, but that's my own damned fault for setting my expectations too high. It should still be pretty cool, however this thing breaks, as long as Vince DOES hand it off to someone else and doesn't insist on lingering.

So yeah, the main event delivered everything I thought it needed to, as a match and as a Sports Entertainment Segment... you had a few guys in there who definitely made sure the ringwork was top notch, and you had a few jump-off-the-couch moments, too. I mean, even without Sting, the flash elimination of Henry and the turn of the Big Show were really well conceived and well executed moments.

Show's status will be interesting. On one hand, he clearly jumped off a sinking ship, and turned heel. But on the other, he still wound up on the losing side, and if our heroes are such good people, shouldn't they forgive Big Show? I mean, I hope so, but only because it's already too retarded on the heel side with Rusev and Henry getting along; Big Show getting along with either is just hella stupid.
 
Technically, Show really wasn't ever eliminated (no matter what Cole said, there was never a count-out), so you might even have some fun with him pretending like he a co-conquerer with Dolph, playing it for laughs, with Show as kind of a loner in his own little narrative, rather than doing the full-on logic-defying heel turn.
 
If I may digress even more... Cena glomming onto Ziggler's win could get fun. Cena didn't do anything, and Dolph beat three guys in a row... so there's a lot of ways to go in terms of friendly-fire. 

Sting explaining himself is something that I bet waits at least a month, if not till the Rumble. I'd heard the rumors about him showing up, but from the business end of things, the ENTIRE motivation was to use him as a final drawing tool for "Free November" on the Network... and WWE wanted to put him on the PPV, and purposely hold him off TV this week (despite the need for follow-up), to drive stragglers to sign up for the Network and watch the Survivor Series Replay.

In so far as that goes, it's a very valid promotional strategy, so I do fully expect Sting to be absent from TV and WWE to use still shots of him as their last ditch effort to drive Network sign-ups.

Then, by the time he finally DOES have to explain himself, hopefully we'll all have forgotten how stupid it was that he was just backstage like a normal wrestler and had full music/tron-video... and we'll just accept it when he says he -- as a crusader for good -- couldn't stand what HHH was doing. And then, when Sting vs. HHH happens at WM31, we'll all enjoy the hell out of it.

A lot more than we'd have enjoyed a Sting vs. Brokentaker match, anyway. Taker's OK when his opponent is still spry. Sting is not spry. But HHH is spry enough, and will have a killer match against Sting, if that's where we're going.

Tag title match was really good, and as an unabashed Sandow Fanboy, I loved the outcome. So those bookends were really the story of the show. Everything in the middle kind of just happened... even Ambrose/Wyatt was kind of an afterthought; for as intense as it was while it lasted, it was ultimately just an advertisment for next month's Rematch With Props.

But nothing in the middle offended the senses, so honestly, what is there to complain about?

Oh yeah, there's the shitty stream to complain about. By the end of the show, I checked, and all those 5 second stutters had added up to me being somewhere between 4 and 5 minutes behind real time. You do the math... that was a genuinely disruptive expereince. And again, I did all the legwork/diagnostics to rule out any problem at my end (and internet speed tests say Time Warner was innocent tonight, too, no matter how much I hate them). So this is all on WWE failing to plan adequately for all the freeloaders who showed up.

I think that's pretty inexcusable, but at the same time, it's also the first time this has happened to me during a PPV (and any other issues I had, I blamed on a 4-year-old router, which was replaced months ago). So I'm not gonna be a huge prick about it.

That said, if others want to be huge pricks, go right ahead (a cursory survey of the internets reveals this was a widespread issue). If your willingness to be difficult somehow gets me a one-month credit to my WWE Network account, I'll gladly take it.

In the meantime, I'll play nice, and limit my assessment to the creative/on-screen aspect of Survivor Series. And in that regard, I think I'll go ahead and hand out a grade of B-plus.


This was a night capped off by a special, singular, memorable moment, and while it was not without a few holes, it was also backed up by a lot of solid in-ring action. If only they'd thrown at least one borderline Match of the Year candidate out there, we could have gone even higher. But B+, it is.

See you in 24 for the RAW recap, kids.