Tyson Tomko & Snitsky (585 pounds) vs Chris Chaos and Brandon T (Sheffield, England, 450 pounds, already in the ring) - Coach brings the Inside Info: they've got licensed masseuses at every show, so Tyson really didn't have to have Snitsky massaging him. Meanwhile, Tyson and Snitsky are shoving and slapping each other to fire themselves up for this match. Your ref is Choida. Tomko and - well, one of the other guys to start. Tomko decides to talk trash to the other one. The one in the room tries to attack Tomko, and gets bull rushed into a corner. Tag to Snitsky, who gets a better bearhug and rushes the guy in blue tights into the opposite corner, pausing to level his partner while he's there. Big right. Tag to Tomko. Hold for a shot to the gut. Choke. Todd lays the ground work for these two vs Show and Kane. Snitsky's the one now beating on the guy who still doesn't have a name. Slam. Todd has absolutely no idea who is who, because he keeps saying "Brandon T...and Chris Chaos blah blah blah" to cover his bets. Let's decide this guy is Brandon T, to make it easier for me. Snitsky drops an elbow on him. One two Chaos (I guess) breaks it up with a double stomp on the cover and runs cross ring to hit Tomko. Announcers want to call the action but still don't know. Snitsky grabs Chaos in a double choke and throws him hard into the card, then other way way, straight into a killer Tomko big boot. Snitsky grabs Brandon in a side slam, and Tomko adds a bad elbow driver. They need to work on that. One two three. (2:16) More shoving, more slapping. Let's move on.

Shelton/Angle/Daivari/Cena recap. (1:34)

Lance Cade (Nashville, TN, 265 pounds) vs Viscera (Harlem, NY, 488 pounds) - huh, Lillian tells Lance not to take a step near her. That's odd. Coach says he'll hang out with Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch but not Viscera. Viscera is dancing and the crowd is cheering. All of this is wrong. Lance relates his opinion about Viscera to Viscera, and then slaps him in the face. Viscera slaps back, and down goes Lance. Hip swivel to the face. Stalling. Good idea. Your ref is Jack. Inside, Lance with a headlock, shot off, back with a shoulderblock, down he goes. Viscera gets in a headbutt. Cade taking his time. Lockup, Kick, slam, uh uh. Lance backs up and rethinks this. Off the ropes, ducks a Vis clothesline, crossbody caught by Viscera. Viscera holds him and circles, before slamming him. Punches and forearms in the corner. Corner whip, revving up, and Lance slides out before he can get sandwiched. Viscera grabs him, and gets his neck snapped over the top rope. Lance all the way up, top rope shoulderblock one two NO. Forearms to the back, but Vis is still getting up. Knee, off the ropes, sunset flip, are you a moron? He's smart enough to move in time, and then hit a diving clothesline to topple Viscera over. One two no. Chinlock. Holding it in. Battling up. Forearm. Forearm. Off the ropes, kick is caught, and Viscera short clotheslines him. Lance runs into a back elbow. Headbutt. Whip, side slam. Time to end it? Oh no, worse. Visagra. Vis picks him up, whip, head down too soon, and Lance kicks it. off the ropes again, into the Embalmer. One two three. (4:46) Viscera gets the crowd to raise the roof? Huh.

That's it.