They had Kayfabe.

I want to make one thing clear- my generation of fans didn’t think wrestling was “real”.  Well, some of us did, but those were typically the same people who thought Proctor and Gamble was owned by Satan.  No- we were smart enough to realize that the likelihood of a seven-foot hillbilly with 30 inch biceps suddenly leaping out of the audience and magically becoming part of the show were pretty slim.  We knew that Cowboy Bob Orton couldn’t POSSIBLY need a cast for half a decade.  We knew that Roddy Piper probably didn’t wear a kilt in real life.  And here’s the thing- we didn’t need anyone explaining these facts to us, either.

But then Vince McMahon came along.  Vince didn’t want to ‘insult our intelligence’ by pretending the matches were real.  There were several problems with this- the first being that Vince seemed awfully willing to insult our intelligence in every other conceivable way.  The second was that Vince was insulting our intelligence by implying that, prior to his ‘stunning announcement’, all of us had totally believed that wrestling was complete legit.

Killing Kayfabe opened a Pandora’s Box that probably hurt wrestling more than it helped.  With that one simple act, Vince opened the door for wrestling’s fanbase to be destroyed from within.  Let’s take a look at the fallout.

The first, most trivial result was that everybody on the planet who was looking for a reason to feel superior to someone else suddenly had ammunition to use against wrestling fans.  Smug little editorials were written, mocking fans of an admittedly “fake” sport.  People with nothing better to do with their time started infesting internet fan sites, snidely informing fans that their chosen interest was ‘pretend fighting’.  The irony being, of course, that the fans knew it was staged all along- it was wrestling’s self-appointed detractors who’d been unclear on the issue.

But it wasn’t wrestling’s critics who were the real problem.  It was the fans.  Suddenly, fans rushed to prove how “in on the joke” they’d always been.  They began larding their conversation with terms like “Showing Ass”, “Jobbing”, “Blading”, “Exposing the Business”, “Getting Over”, Having Heat”, and so forth.  They were so intent on being seen as knowledgeable, that they became, in a way, even more gullible, even bigger “Marks”, than anyone from the Kayfabe era had ever been.

In the days of Kayfabe, nobody questioned the actions of the wrestlers.  If Mr. Wonderful punked out Hulk Hogan during a tag match, we understood that Ordorff was just a jerk, and no matter HOW many times he fooled Hogan into trusting him, he’d always screw Hogan over in the end.  But not today.  Now fans are thrown into a tizzy whenever a wrestler diverges from their narrow perception “how their character should act”.  Fans are more concerned with whether Stephanie McMahon is “acting like a Face” or “acting like a Heel” than they are with what she’s actually doing or saying. 

In the end, this attitude has damaged Pro Wrestling, almost to the point of no return. In our mad rush to DEMAND that Heels and Faces be spelled out in broad, cartoonish terms, we’ve made it so that there really are no Heroes or Villains.  Let’s take the Rock for example.  While it would be hard to overstate the sheer talent he embodies, the fact remains that he’s basically a cartoon- and we as fans demand that he remains one.  Rock has been universally praised for his willingness to “put over” other talent, but I have to wonder- was Randy Savage ever concerned with “putting over” Ricky Steamboat?  No, he just crushed Ricky’s trachea with a ring bell, then beat the living crap out of him at every opportunity.

I hate to think of how the classic Savage/Steamboat matches would go over today.  We’d probably complain that Savage was “squashing” Ricky.  We’d complain about the workrate of George the Animal Steele as Ricky’s Corner Man.  

In short, we probably wouldn’t enjoy it.  I look at Triple H- one of the greatest all-time Heels our sport has produced.  Yet a whole mythology has grown up around him, as fans rush to condemn him for the unpardonable crime of being one of the last guys to portray a genuinely unlikable Heel character.  Apparently, we only like Heels if they’re letting the Hurricane make fun of them and making jokes during their promos.  It’s come to the point where the only defining feature of Heels is the fact that they insult the local sports team.  You can almost sense the audience waiting -- “Has he knocked our football team yet?  Is it okay to Boo him?”

Yet let a Heel punk out a clearly weaker opponent, or verbally abuse someone, or act in an egotistical manner, and the fans, who claim to know it’s all fake, instantly assume that the wrestler in question is actually an egotistical jerk.  We claim that the wrestling match was actually symbolic of some deeper issue- if Triple H has a match with Maven, we assume it’s because Hunter has an issue with the Tough Enough guys.  Nobody stops to question how having a match with the World Heavyweight Champion could possibly hurt Maven’s career.

I often wonder what good, if any, has come from the death of Kayfabe.  When I watch the Sopranos, I don’t feel the need to be constantly reminded that what I’m seeing “isn’t real”.  And I don’t feel the need to be show my ‘backstage knowledge’ by claiming that Tony has ‘backstage heat’ with Ralphy, and that’s why Tony Squashed Ralphy in the infamous “head in a bowling bag” match.  I’m pretty sure most of my enjoyment for the Sopranos would evaporate if I spent all my time worrying about Meadow’s workrate, or questioning why Furio was released after two seasons.

Yet that’s what wrestling fans do now days- instead of talking about feuds or the nefarious schemes of the bad guys, they worry about who’s getting pushed, and who’s being ‘underutilized’.  Back in MY day (and yes, I walked ten miles in the snow to school, uphill both ways) we didn’t complain that the Freebirds were languishing in the tag-team ranks.  We didn’t complain that King Kong Bundy couldn’t do an Asai Moonsault.  We liked guys like Bundy because he was a big, hulking freak of nature, and looked genuinely scary.  We had fun watching the Honky Tonk Man, Jake the Snake and Greg Valentine, not because they could bounce around like Rey Mysterio Junior, but because they had tons of personality, and it was fun sitting back and watching their little weekly dramas.

When Kayfabe ruled the Earth, it was enough to know that Hulk Hogan always won, and always WOULD win, because he was the living embodiment of Truth, Justice, and Eating your Vitamins.  Hell, he was Captain America !  He entertained us, and we cheered him.  When Kayfabe died, we couldn’t cheer the Hulkster any more.  We had to acknowledge that he was really an ego-centric drug abuser who was using his political influence to remain onstage far past his prime.  AND IT SUCKED.  Hell, what’s the point of acknowledging that your fictional heroes are only fictional?  How would you like it if you went to see the Matrix sequels and the people beside you kept commenting on what a bad actor Keanu Reeves is, and what a bastard he is in his private life?  The fact is that you’re there to escape reality, not wallow in it.

I miss Kayfabe.  I want to sit back and BELIEVE that Shane Helms is the Hurricane.  The same way that I BELIEVE James Gandolfini is Tony Soprano for the hour a week I watch him.  I really couldn’t care less who he is or what he does when I’m not watching.  I think a lot of wrestling fans feel the same way- note the way stadium crowds have embraced Hogan’s return.  They’re not cheering him for any other reason than because he’s the Hulkster- the guy who body slammed Andre!  The guy that ate his vitamins, said his prayers, and ran around in a goofy yellow and orange headband.   And if it bugs some people that I’m cheering for the guy that THEY see as a lumbering, ancient, steroid abusing ego-fiend- well, that’s their view.  I have my hero, they have their villain.  I think in the end, I’m happier with my view than they are with theirs.

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