Hiya all! Man, the 'rasslin scene just keeps getting better and better! I LOVE WRESTLING AGAIN! I just can't explain the joyous happiness that pervades me. And one big reason why: Chris Jericho. The man, the myth- the new Smarkiest Man Alive!

Y2J has done the impossible- he's replaced my personal hero Scott Keith as Lord God King of the Smarks. I got a tattoo of the Lion King right directly on my left buttcheek, THAT'S how wonderful Jericho is in my eyes! I even scrapped one of the best editions of the Smarkies ever just so I could devote an entire column to Mr. Undisputed Champion, Y2J! So with that in mind, let's launch in to a very special event- the only Pro Wrestler to EVER win a Smarky Award!

Actually Chris, I wanted a decent PPV. Think you can swing THAT for me next month?
"You want a war? Now you've got one."
-Chris Jericho, commenting on the general poor fan reaction to his KOTR curtain jerker.

You're furious? I paid money to watch you stink up the joint. How do you think *I* feel?
"After reading what all of you "Smarks" (and believe me, you are all still marks) had to say about my match and the show, I am furious. "
-Y2J, doing his best 'Mr. Furious' impersonation.

Was this at some other arena BEFORE the crapfest you foisted on us at KOTR?
"I had one of my best matches of the year tonight with RVD, that featured 20 minutes of tremendous action, innovative false finishes and an absolutely tremendous crowd. "
-Y2J again.

I'm not sure there's enough drugs in the WORLD to make any part of this statement true.
"It was everything I could've asked for in a match and it was in my opinion, an off the charts performance from RVD and myself, match of the year calibre "
-Y2Delusional yet again.

Oh, so THAT'S where it went.
"I can humbly state that we stole the show."
-Y2J

I think it's safe to say that we ALL felt burned, Chris.
"The crowd was so into it that they were burned out after we went on"
-Y2J

Many of us like blood sausage. Many of us are idiots.
"Many of you state that the match was very good or excellent."
-Y2J

I personally feel that Chris has much crappier matches still left in him.
"But many others are saying that the match was slow and predictable with one jackass even saying that it was one of the worst matches of my career!!! "
-Y2J

For you to take a bath and comb your hair occasionally?
"What the hell do you people want?"
-Y2J

During your match, my guess would be "the snackbar".
"What is it that you are looking for? "
-Y2J

Ted Bundy said the same thing about the last few girls he dated.
"If the Columbus fans were quiet, they sure as hell weren't during my match"
-Y2J

Maybe that's why you're not Main Eventing.
"Well if you didn't like my match tonight, then you are out of luck if you're a Jericho fan, cause it was the best you're gonna get, jerky. "
-Y2J

Looking at the ratings, I'd say a lot of people have already done just that.
"If you didn't like it, then stop watching me and stop watching the WWE and take up bowling, cause you will never like anything we give you."
-Y2J

Christian just called. He wants his temper tantrum gimmick back.
"I'm the first one to admit when my performance is not up to snuff, or when something was bad and I'm the most self critical person on the WWE roster, but tonight's performance was me at my finest. Didn't like it? Get the F out then and good riddance to you."
-Y2J

God, I hope so…
" For all of you that enjoyed my match I say thanks. For those that didn't like it, I don't care cause I'm through with you."
-Y2J

Substitute "wrestling" for "the internet" and you'll know exactly how I feel about Chris Jericho.
"I am now finished with the internet and I'm finished with this sight because I hate what you marks are doing. You've spoiled it for me."
-Y2J, who's so enraged that he can't even spell "site" correctly.

You're not dead YET, Chris. But we can always hope.
"No, but we are killing ourselves to try and entertain you and if you don't respect that then kiss my ass. "
-Y2J, taking his Mouse and going home.

Interesting way to keep the business "around forever"- having shitty matches and then telling the fans to fuck off.
"I want the business to be around forever and I am doing my part to keep it great and I did that tonight, no matter what any of you think."
-Y2J

You forgot "Whiney little bitch".
"One of the best wrestlers in the world and one of the performers in the best match of the night and match of year candidate from the KOR, Chris Jericho"
.-Y2J

You mean by doing silly little "I'm an Internet Heel!" angles?
"Alot (sic) of the boys pander to you on their websites"
-Y2J

That's it for now, folks! I'm trying to get back Weekly, so look for the column Jericho bumped to appear very soon! So until next time, here's hoping Jericho remembers to take his Prozac, and visit ITVR, where almost everyone but me actually LIKED Jericho's sleepwalk... uh, "match" at KTOR!