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TWO OUT OF THREE FALLS
God Help the WWF and Us Fans
January 17, 2002

by Mark Coale
Odessa Steps Magazine/Dr. Alquimia Magazine/OnlineOnslaught.com

 

“Wild, dark times are rumbling toward us, and the prophet who wishes to write a new apocalypse will have to invent entirely new beasts, and beasts so terrible that the ancient symbols of Saint John will seem like cooing doves and cupids and comparisons.” -- Heinrich Hesse, Lutezia (1855)

It appears to be a forgone conclusion that not only Kevin Nash is returning to the WWF, but also he’ll now be joined by Hulk Hogan, Scott Hall and maybe Shawn Michaels. Well, wrestling business, it was nice knowing you.

It’s easy at this point, assuming everything the insiders are saying is true, to say the business is doomed. Is that just a knee-jerk reaction? Maybe, but I don’t know how even spinmeisters like James Carville or Mary Matalin could point out the positives?

Oh, there’ll be a short term bump from the casual fans. I know, I can’t believe it, but here’s the problem of traveling in small circles. Most of the people I personally talk to on a regular basis are smart fans and share a similar mentality toward the business and who they do and don’t like. But listen to an over-the-air wrestling radio show (as I usually do every week) and you constantly hear people asking about Hogan and Nash and Hall and Goldberg and the Undertaker. So, “the great unwashed” are out there and, I hate to say it, but they outnumber us (the smarts reading websites like this) by a great majority.

But, how long will take for even the masses to tire of their primadonna act? How will these fans react when these fans show up to their local house show to see the N.W.O. and they’d be lucky to see Sean Waltman and HHH? 

I wish I had positive things, and I mean anything, to write here. I just don’t know any. History tells me we are in for a meltdown and the nuclear winter will be long and cold.

At least there’s always Lucha and Puroresu. Time to brush up on my foreign language skills. You know, I bet there are dozens of people in the WWF thinking the exact same thing.

E-MAIL MARK 
BROWSE THE 2/3 FALLS ARCHIVE

Mark Coale has the same kind of acidic foreboding in his stomach about this that he used to get when taking comp exams in grad school. I hope the results turn out better this time.

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