The Online Onslaught Forums


By contributing to Online Onslaught, you'll help make sure we're around for years to come. Toss us as little as a few bucks, or as much as your generosity allows. Thanks!

Last active: Never Not logged in [Login ]

Printable Version |
Subscribe | Add to Favorites
New Topic New Poll New Reply
Author: Subject: Zombie Attack In Miami!!!
desjr001
Showstopper






Posts 511
Registered 9-18-2004
Location Tampa Rasslin City USA
Member Is Offline

Mood: kiss my assable

posted on 5-27-2012 at 01:36 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Zombie Attack In Miami!!!

World War Z begins...in Florida!!!

http://usnews.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/05/26/11899538-report-miami-police-shoot-naked-man-chewing-on-victims-face?lite


A Miami police officer fatally shot a naked man chewing the face of another man Saturday afternoon on a downtown causeway off-ramp, officials said.


The Miami Herald reported that the naked man chewed off half the face of his victim, who is struggling for his life.

The violence started at 2 p.m. on the MacArthur Causeway off-ramp, just south of the Herald’s offices, the newspaper said.

Witnesses said that a woman saw two men fighting and flagged down a police officer, who came upon the naked man mauling the other man, the Herald reported.
Advertise | AdChoices

The officer, who was not identified, ordered the naked man to back away, but when the man continued the assault, the officer shot him, the Herald said. Witnesses told the Herald the wounded attacker continued to eat his victim, so the officer continued firing.

Witnesses said they heard at least a half-dozen shots, the Herald said.

The naked man was later seen lying face down on the pedestrian walkway just below the newspaper’s two-story parking garage, the Herald said.

The naked man’s victim was transported to Jackson Memorial Hospital Ryder Trauma Center and had critical injuries, police told the Herald.

Neither man was identified.


“Based on the information provided, our Miami police officer is a hero and saved a life,’’ Javier Ortiz, spokesman for Miami police’s Fraternal Order of Police, told the Herald.

A police department news release about the shooting did not include many details provided by witnesses to the newspaper.

Police requested surveillance video that had been obtained by the newspaper, the Herald reported.

The shooting and investigation tied up causeway traffic as crowds were arriving at South Beach for an annual Urban Beach Week hip-hop festival.





There is no exception,
that everyone thinks they are the exception.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
Biff_Manly
Man of a Thousand Holds






Posts 1143
Registered 6-16-2006
Member Is Offline

Mood: Ridiculous

posted on 5-27-2012 at 10:49 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
As a person lacking guns and kind of injured right now, and with people who I love who aren't exactly special service soldiers I find the whole zombie thing annoying. Yeah, it sounds fun in the video game or movie but even by those standards most people don't make it. The ones who do usually do by blind luck.

Do you really want your little daughter turning into a mindless beast that you have to put a bullet into. What if you act to slow and instead you watch as she tears into your wife as she hand her the milk?

A true rising of the undead would be horrible. I'd only hope the government would not fuck up as badly as they do in movies. But if they didn't. Are you really ready to spend the rest of your short life on edge for the the walkers? Do you have a safe place to go with food? Water? Ready for years?

If this is a real undead rising, games over man; the games just begun.

Unless this is the rising of the undead and the rapture has happened or is about to happen in which case I love you god and Jesus and please take this sinner home amen!





"Walter: I can solve everything by making this gramophone have sex with time."
--SCSA's Fringe on Ice Holiday Spectacular.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
nOOb
The Man






Posts 5859
Registered 5-24-2004
Member Is Offline

Mood: Hot Dog!

posted on 5-27-2012 at 10:57 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
It's only when the government starts getting involved with their camps for both the healthy and injured that things start getting messy






View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
desjr001
Showstopper






Posts 511
Registered 9-18-2004
Location Tampa Rasslin City USA
Member Is Offline

Mood: kiss my assable

posted on 5-28-2012 at 01:08 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Further links...

http://www.latimes.com/news/nation/nationnow/la-na-nn-florida-face-attack-20120527,0,6360405.story

http://blogs.miaminewtimes.com/riptide/2012/05/naked_man_shot_by_miami_police.php

http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/26/2818832/naked-man-shot-killed-on-macarthur.html

I mean, no shit, this is how it begins right? Next thing you know everything south of Tampa will be sealed off by the military. Shit, what am I saying? Might as well cut off all of Florida like a frostbit toe.





There is no exception,
that everyone thinks they are the exception.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
salmonjunkie
Best There Is Was or Ever Will Be






Posts 10588
Registered 6-25-2002
Location Sunny Seattle, WA
Member Is Offline

Mood: charged

posted on 5-28-2012 at 07:01 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by desjr001

I mean, no shit, this is how it begins right? Next thing you know everything south of Tampa will be sealed off by the military. Shit, what am I saying? Might as well cut off all of Florida like a frostbit toe.


I'd be ok with this, regardless of zombies.

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member   salmonjunkie 's Aim   salmonjunkie 's Yahoo
Matte
"Family Man"






Posts 7812
Registered 12-16-2008
Member Is Offline

Mood: YES!

posted on 5-28-2012 at 07:18 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Sounds like PCP turned this guy into a zombie to me.





"I'm a professional. I know exactly what I'm doing." - Jeff Hardy

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
BBMN
HAVES A CROOKED DICK!! !






Posts 1794
Registered 6-27-2007
Location 1984
Member Is Offline

Mood: Prayer Fight

posted on 5-29-2012 at 08:27 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
First thought, no bullshit - "I bet it's in Florida."

Second thought - "Why is Ohio trailing in the insanity these days?!"


I would rip someone's throat out with my hands if they tried to bite my face. For reals.

And awesome link to the CDC site. So ridiculously awesome.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
Chris Is Good517
Best There Is Was or Ever Will Be






Posts 12368
Registered 1-10-2002
Location Little Rock, AR
Member Is Offline

Mood:

posted on 5-29-2012 at 05:24 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Matte
Sounds like PCP turned this guy into a zombie to me.


Yeah, call me a skeptic or a buzzkill or whatever, but my first thought was "PCP is a hell of a drug, man"





Monday Night Flaw, a podcast about professional wrestling starring OO's own Figure Foreskin as Andy the Smarmy Host and Chris Is Good517 as Cousin Balki.

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member
mastermind
Man of a Thousand Holds






Posts 1077
Registered 3-7-2002
Location Brockton MA
Member Is Offline

Mood: No Mood.

posted on 5-29-2012 at 10:08 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Google "Big Lurch".
View User's Profile E-Mail User Visit User's Homepage View All Posts By User U2U Member
Paddlefoot
Rocco Rock of Jabroni






Posts 3305
Registered 1-19-2008
Location basement
Member Is Offline

Mood: Hurr durr derp

posted on 5-29-2012 at 10:14 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Big lunch.

D&D+PCP=FTW





You are a bastard. A daughter-fucking wildling bastard.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
Chris Is Good517
Best There Is Was or Ever Will Be






Posts 12368
Registered 1-10-2002
Location Little Rock, AR
Member Is Offline

Mood:

posted on 5-30-2012 at 01:02 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
There's now speculation that instead of cocaine psychosis (or PCP, as Matte and I assumed) the cause could be bath salts. So yeah, good call getting high on that shit, bored middle American teenagers.

Gawker also posted a link to the after pictures of the poor bastard who had his face eaten off, and I'm not posting that here because holy shit, it is fucking horrific and I HATE myself for even looking at them.

But I will show this cheerful little list of other incidents that will be sure to help those of us who think The Walking Dead is our inevitable future to lose a lot of sleep for a few months.





Monday Night Flaw, a podcast about professional wrestling starring OO's own Figure Foreskin as Andy the Smarmy Host and Chris Is Good517 as Cousin Balki.

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member
salmonjunkie
Best There Is Was or Ever Will Be






Posts 10588
Registered 6-25-2002
Location Sunny Seattle, WA
Member Is Offline

Mood: charged

posted on 5-30-2012 at 07:14 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I also checked out the pics of the victim because I'm a morbid bastard.


DAAAAAAAYYYYUUUUUUMMMMM!!!!!!!





unOOfficial guide to the WWE titles.

WWE Championship - Champion of the WWE Universe.
World Championship - Champion of the Planet Earth in the WWE Universe.
Intercontinental Championship - Champion of the 7 continents (even the 2 or 3 that don't matter) on the planet Earth in the WWE Universe.
US Championship - Champion of the United States of America, the best and awesomest place on the planet Earth in the WWE Universe.

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member   salmonjunkie 's Aim   salmonjunkie 's Yahoo
Thom
The Immortal One






Posts 4395
Registered 1-14-2003
Location In my bunk
Member Is Offline

Mood: datazz

posted on 5-30-2012 at 02:44 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
REAVERS!!!





"Bring it, motherfucker." - Mae Young to Bob Holly

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member
Biff_Manly
Man of a Thousand Holds






Posts 1143
Registered 6-16-2006
Member Is Offline

Mood: Ridiculous

posted on 5-31-2012 at 05:03 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Thom
REAVERS!!!


Zoe: If they take the ship, they'll rape us to death, eat our flesh and sew our skins into their clothing. And if we're very very lucky, they'll do it in that order.





"Walter: I can solve everything by making this gramophone have sex with time."
--SCSA's Fringe on Ice Holiday Spectacular.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
Chris Is Good517
Best There Is Was or Ever Will Be






Posts 12368
Registered 1-10-2002
Location Little Rock, AR
Member Is Offline

Mood:

posted on 5-31-2012 at 10:36 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
More fun with cannibals!

An incident in Baltimore and one in Sweden, although thankfully they don't seem to have anything in common with the Miami thing, which I think we can write off as some dude fucked out of his mind on drugs.





Monday Night Flaw, a podcast about professional wrestling starring OO's own Figure Foreskin as Andy the Smarmy Host and Chris Is Good517 as Cousin Balki.

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member
williamssl
Steers and Queers






Posts 6132
Registered 1-11-2004
Location Hippieville
Member Is Offline

Mood: Fuck USC

posted on 6-1-2012 at 04:39 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote






Don't Mess With Texas

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
Matte
"Family Man"






Posts 7812
Registered 12-16-2008
Member Is Offline

Mood: YES!

posted on 6-2-2012 at 12:06 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Not only are people eating other people because of these bath salts, their flesh is decaying and limbs are being hacked off, as well. Sounds scarily similar to krokodil.

The response? More bans. The public reaction? More chemicals. The circle of life.





"I'm a professional. I know exactly what I'm doing." - Jeff Hardy

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
desjr001
Showstopper






Posts 511
Registered 9-18-2004
Location Tampa Rasslin City USA
Member Is Offline

Mood: kiss my assable

posted on 6-22-2012 at 03:27 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
The Zom-Poc is working it's way up the state!!!


http://www2.tbo.com/news/news/2012/jun/21/3/zombie-like-attacker-bites-meat-out-of-palmetto-ma-ar-418784/


(BTW, Zom-Poc is MY word. You heard it here 1st...
unless of course, examples can be given to the contrary dated before today)





There is no exception,
that everyone thinks they are the exception.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
desjr001
Showstopper






Posts 511
Registered 9-18-2004
Location Tampa Rasslin City USA
Member Is Offline

Mood: kiss my assable

posted on 6-23-2012 at 07:00 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
And here is the reason...

27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" id="ep">





There is no exception,
that everyone thinks they are the exception.

View User's Profile View All Posts By User U2U Member
Thom
The Immortal One






Posts 4395
Registered 1-14-2003
Location In my bunk
Member Is Offline

Mood: datazz

posted on 6-28-2012 at 02:49 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
And the toxicology report is in!!!

quote:
The Miami-Dade Medical Examiner found only marijuana in the body of the man who was fatally shot while chewing a homeless man's face over Memorial Day weekend.

The medical examiner's office said on Wednesday that 31-year-old Rudy Eugene's toxicology was complete.


"The department's toxicology laboratory has identified the active components of marijuana," the medical examiner said in a statement. "The laboratory has tested for but not detected any other street drugs, alcohol or prescription drugs, or any adulterants found in street drugs."

The department also ruled out common drugs found in the street drugs called bath salts, which authorities had initially speculated were the cause of the brutal attack on Ronald Poppo."



Seriously? Only weed? I figure either Eugene was mentally disturbed, as well as high; or they missed something.


edit: stupid formatting; stupid me for not previewing.

[Edited on 6/28/12 by Thom]





"Bring it, motherfucker." - Mae Young to Bob Holly

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member
chretienbabacool
The Great One






Posts 3402
Registered 3-5-2003
Location Columbia, MO
Member Is Offline

Mood: Go Cubs!

posted on 6-28-2012 at 04:30 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Pot causes face chewing! Which makes perfect sense as when he got the munchies and ran out of chips he resorted to eating face.
View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member
mastermind
Man of a Thousand Holds






Posts 1077
Registered 3-7-2002
Location Brockton MA
Member Is Offline

Mood: No Mood.

posted on 6-28-2012 at 05:18 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
"Pot Zombies" is one of my all-time favorite flicks.


View User's Profile E-Mail User Visit User's Homepage View All Posts By User U2U Member
thestoryofmikeb
Fella






Posts 373
Registered 11-28-2007
Location Albany, NY
Member Is Offline

Mood: hopeful

posted on 6-28-2012 at 11:28 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Thom
I figure either Eugene was mentally disturbed, as well as high; or they missed something.



C'mon Thom... there's no need to pick on the poor man. His uncle was mean enough to him, and now you're adding more to the pile?







"Is it too much to ask that the wrestling on my screen is fast paced, entertaining, interesting, and at least a little bit LOGICAL???"

View User's Profile E-Mail User View All Posts By User U2U Member   thestoryofmikeb 's Yahoo

New Topic New Poll New Reply


go to top


Powered by XMB 1.8 Partagium Final SP1
Developed By Aventure Media & The XMB Group
Processed in 0.2722559 seconds, 21 queries