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Author: Subject: Paddlefoot's and OOMike's thread of dorkdom and not getting laid
williamssl
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 03:00 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Paddlefoot's and OOMike's thread of dorkdom and not getting laid

Ravenloft

D&D

Whatever.





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Chris Is Good517
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 03:10 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
With your 20-sided die, you roll a 17! The buxom serving wench teases you with her cleavage and then tells you that no, in fact, she does not want to sleep with a nerdy, pimply, unbathed virgin. You leave the tavern to search for a goblin to slay.


Would you like to roll again?





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OOMike
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 03:18 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
My wife plays and we have kids.....





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Paddlefoot
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 03:28 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I went to a Star Trek convention once. It was a riot. More on that later.





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Chris Is Good517
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 03:58 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by OOMike
My wife plays and we have kids.....


Relax, Mike. I was teasing you. Just having fun with stereotypes.





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Thom
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 04:14 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Paddlefoot
I went to a Star Trek convention once. It was a riot. More on that later.



You were in Vancouver?





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mastermind
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 04:21 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Famous People That Play Dungeons And Dragons

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. Stephen Colbert (also went to Gen Con (a dnd/comic/roleplaying convention))
2. Vin Diesel (Wrote the introduction to a book about DnD)
3. Mike Myers
4. Dwayne Johnson AKA The Rock
5. Matt Groening
6. Dame Judy Dench (Introduced to the game by Vin Diesal)
7. Jenny McCarthy
8. -=Edited out cause I was wrong.=-
9. Edwin McCain (Not sure if he still does but did when he was a kid)
10. Wil Wheaton (played on the set of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Still plays to this day)
11. Daryl Hannah
12. Robin Williams (Plays both the Online DnD Game and the Tabletop one)
13. Lexa Doig AKA Rommie and the computer AI from Andromeda
14. Ben Aflac (Forced to play by Kevin Smith on a set once and fell in love. Prefers to play Wizards over fighters.)
15. Mat Damon (Forced to play by Kevin Smith on a set once and fell in love. Prefers to play Fighters over Wizards.)
16. Matthew Lillard (Said so on G4's attack of the show then stole all of thier D&D Minatures Models)
17. Jon Stewart (He also sneaks sutile D&D jokes into his show that only us D&D nerds get to laugh at.)
18. Jim Breuer
19. Brian Warner AKA Marilyn Manson
20. John Carmack and a good portion of the original id Software crew (Some of the characters and story elements in Quake were based off of D&D session iirc)
21. Sebastian Bengtsson
22. Joakim Bengtsson
23. Robert P. Olsson
24. Björn-Erik Karlsson
25. Daniel Antonsson
26. Tommy Karlsson
27. Kevin Smith (Can't I forgot him until now)
28. Eddie Izzard
29. Johnny Vaughn
30. Michael Greco
31. Dave Gorman
32. Charles Manson (He actually ran a game in prision! That is to say until California banned the running of Tabletop RPGs in prision.(This might actually be just a rumor but I don't mind))
33. Scott Edgar (Found the actual quotes! "I also play Dungeons and Dragons with my mates, which everyone reckons is tragic, but I reckon is heaps of fun.")
34. Jon Favreau (Another one with a quote! "I'm a very lazy person by nature. I have to be really engaged, and then I go straight from lazy to obsessive. I couldn't study chemistry, but I could memorize all the books for Dungeons and Dragons. It was ridiculous.")
35. Curt Schilling from, I think, the Red Sox or at least use to be.
36. Todd Pratt from, I think, the Braves or at least use to be.
37. Jimmy Wales (One of the starters of Wikipedia)
38. Jacques Villeneuve (Use to drive race cars. Ironicly he prefers to play Monks in D&D which move faster then all other characters)
39. Rivers Cuomo from Weezer and, it is rumored at least, the rest of the band.
40. Everyone in Marcy's Playground (They even wrote a song called "A Cloak of Elvenkind" Which is a Major Magical Item in Dungeons and Dragons)
41. Everyone in Flashlight Brown (They even wrote a song called "Ready to Roll" which references 20-Sided Dice and A LOT of other D&D related things)
42. Gary Gygax (He was famous enough to play a character on Futurama(himself) so I put him on the list)
43. Seth Greene (Even made a Robot Chicken episode that refenerced THAC0 which was part of the Advance DND (or 2nd Edition) rule set)
44. Trey Parker
45. Matt Stone
46. Patton Oswalt (even talked the Reno 911 guys into doing a DnD part on the show. It was very funny)
47. Stephen King (And certain things from dnd are referenced in The Dark Tower series)
48. Steve Rune Lundin AKA Steven Erikson
49. Joss Whedon (Director of Buffy The Vampire Slayer)
50. Jack Black (He also references DND in the song "Wonderboy")
The following people stole DnD stuff from the teen choice awards. I included pictures when I could find them:
51. Ryan Cabrera
52. Nick Cannon
53. Jon Heder
54. Jesse McCartney (http://i5.tinypic.com/477z19v.jpg)
55. David Boreanaz
56. Lauren Graham (http://i4.tinypic.com/2uhq1dk.jpg)
57. Hulk Hogan (http://i7.tinypic.com/2mzlevt.jpg)

58. Metallica (At least they played Call of Cthulhu and Dungeon and Dragons before Hetfield went into rehab)
59. Conan O'Brian (Use to play at least. He has mentioned it on his show)
60. Darby Conley (though he is C-List at best)
61. Andrew W.K.
62. The band Amon Amarth (Can I get a Wha wha from all my metalheads?)
63. My Chemical Romance (They played with Thrice during the Vans Warp Tour. My Chemical Romance's lead singer Gerard Way plays a Half-Elf Ranger)
64. Thrice (Played with My Chemical Romance during the Vans Warp Tour.)
65. Alice Cooper Played D&D (And even replayed the events of a game on an episode of That 70's Show)
66. Some/All of Barenaked Ladies
67. Raymond E Feist (He Actually uses a self created world in his books that was originally created for his Dungeons and Dragons game back home)
68. Kari Byron (Played DnD and has thought about getting Adam and Jaime to play with her.)
69. Brian Posehn
70. Jason Mewes (Though when asked about it he says "DND IS FOR FAGGOTS" then turns to Kevin Smith and starts laughing)
71. Robert Jordan (And his sons which he taught how to play)
72. Weird Al Yankovic
73. Mastodon's Drum Brann Dailor
74. Neil Fallon and MAYBE the other members of Clutch (They even wrote an unreleased song called 24 Earth Years which mentioned playing AD&D back in the day)
75. David X. Cohen (In David's piece in the 30 year D&D hardback book, he says he never had time to play during Futurama, but most the writers did, and they kept D&D books in the office as "referrence" material.(He did get to play while working on The Simpsons though))
76. Alexis Cruz (He also LARPs. HAHAHA Nerd)
77. David Cross (He also mentions a group of comedians he plays with but wouldnt name them.)
78. Billy Crystal (He also plays 40K With Robin Williams)
79. R.A. Salvatore (Though I guess he would have too)
80. Some of the members of Dragonforce (And DND themes have worked their way into Dragonforce songs over and over)
81. David Duchovney (actually mentioned it on Conan O'Brien not too long ago)
82. The band Dayglo Abortions (Even wrote a song about it called Dragons)
83. Donald Faison (He plays Monks)
84. Insane Clown Posse
85. Emilio Estévez
86. Glenn Danzig
87. The Dream Warriors (Anyone one from canada like these guys?)
88. The MadStepDad - renowned internet entity currently on an "UNBAN ME" crusade


The conclusion = ALL GAY! Books = gay!

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denverpunk
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 04:40 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
89. denverpunk -- whose brother (RIP) used to run a D&D campaign when we were kids. I miss those days.

Are we including the computer games in this? I haven't been in a ground campaign for over twenty years, but I've kept up with the PC games -- starting with the old Commodore Pool of Radiance series, up through Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights. All of those are great, btw, aside from Icewind Dale and the console Baldur's Gate beat-em-ups.

Going further along the nerd trajectory....how about the novels? The Forgotten Realms Drizz'zt books are well-documented, but I get a big-time guilty pleasure out of the Gary Gygax Greyhawk novels -- no matter how bad they were written.

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williamssl
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 05:00 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Man...at least I understand what people are talking about in Gooker's gay thread. This one? You people might as well be speaking in Latin.





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gobbledygooker
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 05:13 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I think we need to create a new category for the BOOrdies this year called "Threadstarter Of The Year" and Tex will be the only one in the running.

Goon and I bought a Marvel Comics role-playing game way back when. I don't know what we were expecting but we didn't know you had to, you know, actually use your MIND and IMAGINATION that much. I think we tried to play it once and that was it.

It came with that really fucking cool book though that had, like, every Marvel character ever invented and all of their strengths, weaknesses, and attributes.





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williamssl
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 05:21 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Oh yeah...OOWF.





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Chris Is Good517
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 05:30 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Oh, wait, there's something that Billy Crystal, Charles Manson, Hulk Hogan, the Insane Clown Posse, AND MadStepDad all did? WELL SIGN ME RIGHT THE FUCK UP FOR THAT PLZ





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Joeldacat
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 06:00 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Chris Is Good517
Oh, wait, there's something that Billy Crystal, Charles Manson, Hulk Hogan, the Insane Clown Posse, AND MadStepDad all did? WELL SIGN ME RIGHT THE FUCK UP FOR THAT PLZ








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OOMike
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 08:58 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
CiG - its all good...

I think you can add Lemmy to that list as well....

As for the books, did you read the original DragonLance series? That was basically the novelization of a long ass table top campaign.

Also if you like the Drizzt series, pick up Cleric Quintet and the Spearwielder trilogy, also by Salvatore.





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oomikes woman
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 09:01 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Gentlemen...there is absolutely nothing sexier than a man who wields a sword...and the fact that my man, oomike knows exactly how to use it...well, that makes me one happy lady...no dice required. He is a 20 everytime!!





OOMike is exhausted...it's my turn now!

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denverpunk
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 09:23 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by OOMike
As for the books, did you read the original DragonLance series? That was basically the novelization of a long ass table top campaign.

Also if you like the Drizzt series, pick up Cleric Quintet and the Spearwielder trilogy, also by Salvatore.


I never got into the Cleric Quintet, even though there's been some cross-novelization lately between that and Driz'zt. DragonLance...I should have read those, but never did. I hear they're classics.

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Chris Is Good517
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 09:30 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by oomikes woman
Gentlemen...there is absolutely nothing sexier than a man who wields a sword...and the fact that my man, oomike knows exactly how to use it...well, that makes me one happy lady...no dice required. He is a 20 everytime!!


Nice try, Mike





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mastermind
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 09:35 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I heard (from a friend of a friend) that the original Dragonlance series of novels are exquisite pieces of work. But the actual AD&D 2E boxed set was a little too rigid because it assumed you would play the main characters and adhere to the books almost exactly as they unfolded. Little room for improvisation, but the quality of the work is timeless. That being said, I also heard (from a friend of friend on a messageboard) that Hickman and Weis' greatest contribution to D&D was NOT the Dragonlance saga, it was instead a little niche model they developed in 1986 called "RAVENLOFT". Which is (from what I hear) still the highest selling module of all time.

I also heard RA Salvatore could match Steven King in pure cocaine-infused output, and that Wolfgar is one of the most endearing characters in that entire genre. I also seem to recall a conversation (from friend of a friend on a messageboard) that involved the old school "Marvel Superheros" RPG and it's absolutely fascinating to think during that mid-to late 80s explosion we had RPGs for everything from Ghostbusters to Top Secret to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I also hear that 3.5E (and later 4E) really made the game so much better and more accessible, but that D20 Modern rules mixed with the Ravenloft Masque of the Red Death setting is TOTALLY THE BOMB YO. But that's just what I heard.

books = gay!

Reinstate MSD!

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Paddlefoot
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posted on 6-17-2011 at 09:58 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Where's the love for drunken rounds of original BattleTech? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?





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posted on 6-17-2011 at 11:43 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Is Batteltech anything like Mechwarrior?

I played a tabletop miniture game of mechwarrior once. Did not have to great a time. Everyone was so focused on winning, they forgot to have fun. Me and a fellow player took it upon ourselves to have some fun with kamikaze mechs and other "unusual" tactics. The other guys (apparently they where some kind of serious tournament players) ended up asking us to play at a seperate table. I had alot more fun after that.





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posted on 6-18-2011 at 12:05 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
My brother and I have a shitload of Dragonlance books from back in the day. The original series - "Dragons of Autumn Twilight," "Dragons Of Winter Night," "Dragons Of Spring Dawning," "Time Of The Twins," "Test Of The Twins," and "War of the Twins" as well as quite a bit of the extraneous Dragonlance books. That was some damn fun reading. Not sure how it would hold up today but damned if I wouldn't mine re-reading the series someday.





"Hulk Hogan have the sex with some dumb bitch on the TV. The girl smart if she make the $$ from his bald ass but she also desperate to have sex with the howdy doody like Hulk Hogan. He worse than Mel Gibson and I think now %10000 he prove he have grasshopper dick and raisin balls." - The Iron Sheik

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oomikes woman
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posted on 6-18-2011 at 01:38 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Gook: I just finished reading the DragonLance Chronicles...very good reads although I don't think they would hold up well among today's society of Twitards...I think that the majority of society relies on their reading material to be dumbed down...thus the explaination for anything relating to DnD beyond second edition.

CiG: As for you trying to say I am Mike...I'm not.





OOMike is exhausted...it's my turn now!

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posted on 6-18-2011 at 01:45 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
CiG we had this discussion when she first signed up back when I was Mod3. That is my wife, there is even a pic of her somewhere on here...

Mechwarrior was the character driven part of battletech.

Ravenloft was the fucking bomb and hard as hell to succeed.





2017 where Nazis are defended and being against Fascism is a bad thing.

Prejudices are rarely overcome by argument; not being founded in reason they cannot be destroyed by logic – Tryon Edwards

Never let the facts interfere with a good rant.

The only OO columnist that has never written a column.

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Chris Is Good517
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posted on 6-18-2011 at 03:14 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I know, guys. I was kidding. I thought the smiley face gave that away.

LOOKS LIKE SOMEBODY FORGOT TO ROLL THE 32-SIDED DIE OF SARCASM DETECTION!





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williamssl
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posted on 6-18-2011 at 03:48 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
i regret this thread





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