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Author: Subject: 2hot and Salmonjunkie's big 4000 bash!
salmonjunkie
Best There Is Was or Ever Will Be






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:23 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
2hot and Salmonjunkie's big 4000 bash!

I love you all.





Thanks, Zig!






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fsolomon75
American Dream






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:27 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
OUT-FUCKING-STANDING!

Much props to you both for getting to the big 4000!





Teh wisdom of MooseheadJack: "tpyos are not going to ruin my day today" and "the only thing carved in stone for the Mets is the look on willie's face"

The 2007 Post Of The Year

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borntorun
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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:27 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I love how Thai's skin is yellow.

I love how Scott wears a knit cap in Hell.

I love you. Congrats!





Fake McCoy Comics

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2HoT
The Immortal One






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:30 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I am in the mood for speechifying

Things I learned in 4000 posts at Online Onslaught

∑ Itís fun to make lists for people who hate lists

∑ The people in the OOWF are not freaks. We are GEEKS. There is a huge difference.

∑ In spite of having 4000 posts, I am really quite happy with how active and fulfilling my life is right now. I am sure Thai could probably say the same. I mean between a full time job, being in a band, and going to more concerts in a month than I have attended in my entire life, at least from the outside, it appears that he has it by the tail. Plus he is probably one of the kindest, most genuine, shirt off your back giving, kickass people I have ever met on the interweb.

∑ When the top five people with whom to have a beer subject came up, I thought about making a list, but then I thought, Iíve been here long enough that the folks for whom I would buy a beer, should already know who they are. And for the record, if any of you OOites ever decided to make the trek to the great beyond and drop in on me, the beer would definitely flow.

∑ Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade Slade After a while, it starts to lose all meaningÖ

∑ I am not going to apologize for or attempt to justify everything bad Iíve ever done here, other than to say that there are some of you who Iíve treated very badly. Most of the ones whoíve felt the worst of it, did not stay, or were forcibly removed. I have done a lot of growth in my personal life in the last year or so, and I have come to the realization that a lot of what I have done has come from a very dark place within myself and that it had little or nothing to do with anything anyone on a message board could have possibly done to me. Those who saw me in my early days may or may not have noticed that the volume has been turned down in recent weeks. I just donít think I have the stomach to be so brutal anymore. I really have taken a hard look at this recently because there have been new posters here in recent months who I would have ripped to shreds two years ago. Punkerhardcore, CanadianChris, and Jheaton come immediately to mind. And it would have had really nothing to do with them (although Jheaton does manage frequently to express contempt for the English language) in fact, all things considered, they are actually pretty good posters, that I would have never allowed a chance, simply because they unwittingly did one thing or another to set me off. I am not really sure what I am trying to say here, other than I think that I am at a transitional point in my life and that does not mean I am quitting this board, it just means that I have done some things in the past of which I am not proud, and I hope to cease making those mistakes in future.

∑ I cannot fathom how Bob Holly manages to keep his job. I just donít get it. I think one of the main reasons I remain an active member of the IWC is so that I can be there the day he finally gets his pink slip.

∑ I openly wept in front of coworkers when I found out Eddie Guerrero had passed away. I didnít comment on it here at the time, I just quietly changed my avatar. This is not the place for more of that discussion. Even though I didnít want to talk about it at the time; having a place to go to read the thoughts of others who understood what I was upset about made so much difference, and I thank you all for that.

∑ There are so many people I could acknowledge here that I am sure I am going to forget to single out some of you. But let me just say that it is not because I donít like you (unless it is because I donít like you).

∑ Operation Zigtard. I am not sure where or when all this malice between us developed, but I really donít hate you. Thank you for the flash.

∑ AngstBrad, It is a shame that logistics make chucking dice together impossible, because I know that we could have some rollicking adventures.

∑ Borntorun, I appreciate how you manage to make me laugh on a consistent basis with humour that remains all but free of spite or ill-will.

∑ Jeb, I know how much you dislike this sort of tripe so for you I will keep it short and sweet (if a little clichť). You have a gift. Stop being so goddamned selfish and write a book or something.

∑ Canadian Bulldog, I would be lying if I said I was a fan from the beginning. I really didnít get it the first time I read your column. However, I have since converted and I thank you for the smile you consistently bring to my face. Vive le Revolucion!

∑ BFG, I have no right to be treated as civilly by you as I am. I have treated you terribly over the years and Iím sorry. I feel badly about it because my mom always taught me to be respectful to women.

∑ Bones, my brother, I have no idea when, but one day there is going to be alcohol and/or a pool table between us, I promise you that.

∑ Slade, youíre really not as big a jerk as everyone says you are.

∑ MooseheadJack, all the OOWF writers, and the rest of the OOWF team, thank you for all the work you put in bringing to life something so ultimately pointless and wonderful. It is a pleasure to be among your ranks.

∑ This post is getting really long so I am going to wrap it up by saying thank you to everyone here. Whether we like each other or not, I feel that everyone has the potential to teach me something about myself. So many of you have and I know that many more of you will, so thank you all. I could not have done it without you.





Who wants soup?

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Chris Is Good517
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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:31 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Best ending ever.





Monday Night Flaw, a podcast about professional wrestling starring OO's own Figure Foreskin as Andy the Smarmy Host and Chris Is Good517 as Cousin Balki.

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mooseheadjack







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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:34 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
It's about damn time! you two sat on 3999 forever!

Seriously though congrats on 4K, that is pretty damn impressive! the OOWF wouldn't be the same without either of you (now go post something there dammit!)

And Tardy, that was a great video, that might get you a bOOardie nod.





My personal fuck-off list: 1. Tony Romo 2. Eli Manning 3. The New York Yankees 4. LeBron James 5. Kobe Bryant 6. SEC Fans 7. The SEC 8. the Political Right 9. religion 10. Almost everything the WWE does

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rk
Showstopper






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:52 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
HA! They were holding hands while trembling in fear of the devil! Cowardly gays.





Samoa Joe does Taz!
"I'm actually very popular with all the computer people. They love me"
- Shawn Michaels

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Operation Retard
Beats me, I'm gay!






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 08:54 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by 2HoT
∑ Operation Zigtard. I am not sure where or when all this malice between us developed, but I really donít hate you. Thank you for the flash.


dude! stop breaking kayfabe! you'll ruin our whole gimmick!

anyway, congrats to both scotty 2 potty and thai. you do manage to both post alot and still seem to have regular lives (or at least thai does. i really have no idea how potty spends his day). so good job and all that shit. here's to another 4k.


and everyone else stop "good job"-ing me on the toon. i appreciate it, but this is their party, not mine. that's my gift to them. (but if you guys wanna, ya know, start a whole new thread about how awesome i am, i have no problem with that! )






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SpaceMountainFatBoy
Showstopper






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 09:09 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
You guys r teh roxxorz!

Seriously, congratulations on your respective milestones. Both guys wearing knit caps in Hell, Junk being yellow, and 2Hot's awesome double-backhanded burn on BFG all made me laugh out loud.

Now I'm cursed to hear those voices in head every time I read one of their posts... dammit...





WHY WE FIGHT

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BoerboelLVR
Man of a Thousand Holds






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 09:30 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Congratulations to the both of you. You are an inspiration to us all and I want to have a Sweaty-Man-Love threesome with both of you.

Forget the porkchops boys. We're making a Boerboel sandwich tonight! Oh Yeah!!!


P.S. I heard that the flash was coming. Great work Oppy!





Don't touch me there!

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markout
Man of a Thousand Holds






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posted on 12-12-2005 at 10:19 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Congratulations...I think. At what point do we cease congratulating people for their excessively high post totals and instead start offering condolences?

In all seriousness...you're two of my favorite peeps and I think it's criminal that the talking heads on Fox News don't think you should be able to adopt children. Knowing that these boards have elder statesmen like the two of you speaks volumes for its character. God that was cheesy but it's true.





Do NOT fuck with my chi.

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Toffile
Man of a Thousand Holds






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 12:10 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Congrats both of you. I wonder what Optard has in stock for you when you hit the big 5 triple O.






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OOMatt
Crazy Go Nuts






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 01:53 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
CAMEO APPEARANCE~!~!






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Krydor
The Man






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 03:26 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Way to go, you two crazy kids.






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bigfatgoalie
American Dream






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 04:21 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Congrats on 4K guys....and I'm sure me and my vast collection of porn will soon be joining you guys in the newly opened 4K club.






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mooseheadjack







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posted on 12-13-2005 at 04:26 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
so, we all know hitting 1000 posts gets you in the lounge, 2K gets you into the private viewing room with FFC's 100ft plasma tv, 3K gets you into the super secret VIP lounge where Jeb serves drinks only he has heard of, what exactly does 4K get you? Is that like a special annex of the Thousandaires club or something?





My personal fuck-off list: 1. Tony Romo 2. Eli Manning 3. The New York Yankees 4. LeBron James 5. Kobe Bryant 6. SEC Fans 7. The SEC 8. the Political Right 9. religion 10. Almost everything the WWE does

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Krydor
The Man






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 05:20 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mooseheadjack
what exactly does 4K get you? Is that like a special annex of the Thousandaires club or something?


It gets you AIDS.






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GoVols
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posted on 12-13-2005 at 06:00 AM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Hey, congrats on 4000 guys.

I figured it out, if you spent an average of 5 minutes on each post...that's 20,000 minutes...334 hours...14 days.

So here's my question for the stud posters. Over the last two and half years, what would you have done with your two weeks had you not been posting? Seriously.

Oh, and I'm thinking about posting every five minutes for the next 14 days to catch up with you...screw presents, that's what I want for Christmas.

[Edited on 12-13-2005 by GoVols]






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WLD
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posted on 12-13-2005 at 12:48 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
Congratulations to you both. As a fellow OOWF-ite, I appreciate your work there, as well as your posts on the rest of the board.

Here's to the next thousand (or four).

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BoerboelLVR
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posted on 12-13-2005 at 01:02 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by mooseheadjack
what exactly does 4K get you?



I thought I made it abundantly clear what they get at 4K. Geez Moose, don't you pay attention.





Don't touch me there!

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mooseheadjack







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posted on 12-13-2005 at 01:14 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
well, I should have said what good things do you get with 4K posts.

A raging case of assorted STD's is not a good thing. It's a bad thing.





My personal fuck-off list: 1. Tony Romo 2. Eli Manning 3. The New York Yankees 4. LeBron James 5. Kobe Bryant 6. SEC Fans 7. The SEC 8. the Political Right 9. religion 10. Almost everything the WWE does

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BoerboelLVR
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posted on 12-13-2005 at 01:20 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
They won't get any STDs!!!

They are having sex with me, not your mother!!!





Don't touch me there!

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mooseheadjack







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posted on 12-13-2005 at 01:27 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
zing





My personal fuck-off list: 1. Tony Romo 2. Eli Manning 3. The New York Yankees 4. LeBron James 5. Kobe Bryant 6. SEC Fans 7. The SEC 8. the Political Right 9. religion 10. Almost everything the WWE does

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Slade
The Immortal One






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 04:17 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
quote:
Originally posted by 2HoT
∑ Slade, youíre really not as big a jerk as everyone says you are.


Thank you for believing in me. I can fly higher than an eagle, for you are the wind beneath my wings.









Oh, and congratulations, Salmondude.





The award for the most laughable cringe-worthy attempt at clever colour commentary goes to:

"When you're dating The Architect, you start to get some more plans." - Renee Young, Extreme Rules 2019

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bo_knows
And I am AWESOME






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posted on 12-13-2005 at 04:26 PM Edit Post Reply With Quote
I extend my congratulations to you both. Ever since the earliest days of my lurking, you two have been staples of this board. It wouldn't be the same place without you. Long live the watertower, the mohawk, and Virgil's Zags jersey.





"Between you being naked and Moose washing his ass, I'm in heaven." - fsol

Say what you want about America, thirteen bucks can still get you a hell of a lot of mice.

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