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DRUNK THREAD: Now 50% Catamite Free!
Paddlefoot - 12-6-2014 at 11:29 PM



What happened? Where'd everybody go?

[Edited on 6-20-2017 by Matte]

[Edited on 7/13/2017 by Paddlefoot]


Count Zero - 12-6-2014 at 11:53 PM

We're over here by the mabey...


punkerhardcore - 12-7-2014 at 12:04 AM

Maybe everyone is out shopping? I'm gonna head out in a bit myself, and brave the stores. It's still a bit early in December, and hopefully won't be too much of a shitfuck.


nOOb - 12-7-2014 at 01:00 AM

It's also not really the best time of the year for wrestling. This next Raw is the Raw before TLC, and then they have the post-TLC Raw before WWE usually phones it in for the remainder of the year. With no TNA, Sting already in WWE, CM Punk well and done with wrestling in general, and a product that is phoned in every year for the holidays, it's just a dead period for wrestling.

Unless people want to pretend WWE would let Kurt Angle announce on a Vince Russo podcast that he was going to finish his career with them, rather than keep it as a surprise.


Flash - 12-7-2014 at 01:07 AM

Del Rio has an interview kicking around talking about his being fired... Mind you that one slipped under the radar before this past week's Vince/Punk/everything else happened.

So there's still a bit going on... (crickets)


Paddlefoot - 12-7-2014 at 01:23 AM

I dunno. Except for Sunday PPV's this place seems to be getting far too quiet on weekends. Pun's House is suffering too, because most of the threads haven't seen much action for weeks or even months and their live chat section isn't very active either. Have the other guys assembled elsewhere like on Facebook or Twitter?


williamssl - 12-7-2014 at 02:16 AM

Watching football and hopefully FSU losing (sorry Lana forgive me)


SaiyaJinDX - 12-7-2014 at 02:23 AM

Everyone's busy playing the People's Champ on WWE Supercard. ;-)


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 06:05 AM

Gonna reactivate and use this one as the drunk thread from now on as not to wreck Rumours or any of the other threads. Gotta have it on the main board, by the grace of Teh Rick of course, because it would just get buried in Parts Unknown.

It's country music night tonight, damn you.



It kind of freaks me out because Tom T. Hall is actually the spitting image of my late dad.


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 06:59 AM

Everyone relax 'cause the guy no one wanted to hear from is here. Sorry, but if you don't like it, it's aboot time you took off. Sorry.


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 07:09 AM

I actually had that on cassette back in like 1980 or something when I was still in junior high.


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 07:13 AM

Dave Thomas and The Rick Moreanus are Canadian National Treasures. The heart of Saturday night beats still...


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 07:26 AM

Probably more Rick Moranis at this point in time since Dave Thomas unfortunately got arrested and revealed himself to be just another wife-beating drunk.

Weird thing here. Long John Baldry. Born in Britain, played in the early years with Elton John, English as fucking hell, but his best moments as a singles artist were when he was ripping up the blues clubs in Toronto in the seventies and eighties. He was pretty much an unofficial Canadian national treasure by the time he passed away.


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 07:41 AM

Yeah, well I'd like to know what she said first. I'm kidding.

I have never heard of him before. He's amazing. The fucking King of Rock and Roll. He should have been on the soundtrack to Fury Road. I love lilywhite bluesmen.

To the faithful departed and yer old man...




janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 07:49 AM

SHAZAAM!!!! Hot off the press and also a tip o' the hat to the bOOss for letting us fuck off on here. Behold....Present Day Trish the Dish! OHHHH, I FUC...no, no I didn't.

http://www.newsday.com/sports/pro-wrestling/wwe-divas-trish-stratus-and-lita-at-masters-of-ring-women-s-pro-wrestling-lasting-legacy-event-1.10466093


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 07:55 AM

Let's cheer up a bit please. Sad Canadian is like as unnatural as a sad dog. Does not compute, fucka yankee round eye.


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 08:01 AM

Settle, gentle syrup sucker. You can't hold my flow.


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 08:25 AM

janny erd said something about a glory hole deep in the park and I immediately thought about this


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 08:26 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Paddlefoot
janny erd said something about a glory hole deep in the park and I immediately thought about this




that'd be all of the OO universe together in the bar, in the greatest moment the entire human race ever had, with CIG on the piano


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 08:27 AM

pissed, quoted instead of edited fuck me


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 08:33 AM

With a voice like silk brushing against velvet, Mr. Vince Gill.



[Edited on 5/24/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 08:43 AM

I would attend that celebratiOOn in a heartbeat. And no, I said deep in the dark. As in The Stink. What what.




Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 08:54 AM

Fuck football.



The weird thing about country is that it could rip a hole in all the bullshit things in our POS ugly society. It's the only genre that could rip deep and make things stir from below. Need more songs with balls like this.

[Edited on 5/24/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 09:14 AM

Golly, that was intense.

Time to crash. We have reached the end of the broadcast day.



https://youtu.be/3gHYm112ByQ?list=LLWqOQ2ifnkmbKGTqVETx7Ew


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 09:34 AM

Endut! Hoch Hecht!


janerd75 - 5-24-2015 at 09:43 AM



That's a cute boy band you got there.


Paddlefoot - 5-24-2015 at 10:35 AM

fuck you


PB-13 - 5-24-2015 at 04:40 PM

My weekend:

Friday: Comedy show at the area comedy club(didn't perform, just watched the show). Good times, a STL-area guy headlined.
Saturday: Performed at a bar show in my area; did a fifteen-minute set and got paid. Woo.
Today: Rasslin show this afternoons, should be a good time.
Tomorrow: Nothing special for Memorial Day unless you count sleeping late.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 05:18 AM

So who wants ginger snaps? Or, more accurately, who's drinking tonight?


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 05:28 AM

Farewell and adieu to you fair Canuck ladies,
Farewell and adieu to you ladies of the fracking plains,
For I'm coming back from the non-kayfaybe UFC fights,
So give me a moment and we'll fuck things up agayn.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 05:47 AM

Well, that's no fun at all. Die from depression, Canadian style, bastard!


punkerhardcore - 5-31-2015 at 06:04 AM

I just had some Canadian vodka...


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 06:20 AM

I said give me a moment, you fool. Now I must hunt your misog...mysog...womyn hating ass down. Goshit. 90's shitrock it is then...


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 06:41 AM

Evanescence is like 2000's which is like millennial which equals fuckstick.
You only wish you were a weekend binge alcoholic that was born in the late 1960's, chugalug.

So what's tonight's theme? 1960's? 80's? Country again? Something to do with the Jews? Speak and be heard.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 06:42 AM

quote:
Originally posted by punkerhardcore
I just had some Canadian vodka...


'Babushka' brand from Maple Creek SK?


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 06:48 AM

Goddamnit I wish I was drunk right now.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 06:56 AM

quote:
Originally posted by CM Crunk
Goddamnit I wish I was drunk right now.


You have no one to blame but yourself if you're not.

We gotta seriously arrange a group piss-up for next Saturday. Get everyone involved that wants to participate. Even Teh Rick. Run a pint of whiskey through his broken pancreas just to see what happens. Either screaming or sobbing would be my best guess.


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 07:07 AM

90's, early 2000's...whatthefuckever. It's all the same nucock NickelStain'dCreedBizkit horseflop....

I would stand Teh Rick on his head and dump Beam into his crevasse were he to join this absurd digital adventure. And since I won his delicious radioactive Pancreas in an internet test of manhood contest a while back, I demand he shows himself...for reasons?



Crunk, don't you have a drive through booze store where you live? Living in Florida I can walk up to any child and trade school supplies for flakka, so I might be a bit spoiled. Regardless, at least start huffing paint and get with it holmes...

Right now, I need a lover that won't drive me crazy....


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 07:11 AM

I blame the fucking tooth that I'm taking antibiotics for.

I've recently developed a fondness for Tank 7 Farmhouse Ale (which is about as hipstery fancy as I'll get with my booze) after finding out that one of those is enough to get decently bit. TWO is a party. Now I'm just having night coffee and getting jittery watching Mr. Show skits on YouTube.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 07:11 AM

Cougar? Shoulda been in the American ranks with Springsteen and Segar.


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 07:21 AM

Any mention of Bob Seger is enough for me to randomly segue to this:


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 07:29 AM

Brother Crunk, you're in Cali for eff's sake. Go Green maaaaaaan! The tooth shall set you free.



Johnny C's too pissy and malcontented to hang with Bruce or Bob. Major case of Lead Singer Disease, like my main man David Lee Rothburgsteinwicz. Perhaps a kinder, gentler troubadour is in order...


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 07:32 AM

I worked as a DJ/Karaoke host for 5-6 years, and there was this big lesbian who would come into the bar that I worked at and get blackout drunk on white russians and sing Ain't Even Done With The Night. She looked like John Daly and sounded like Marlee Matlin.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 07:34 AM

Have you ever heard the German band? Incredible French breasts make an appearance here.


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 07:40 AM

At the risk of creating some sort of homoerotic singularity here's some Depeche Mode by way of Rammstein


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 07:54 AM



Mmmm, German is such an efficient, poetic and, soothing language. Behold, The Singularity...





Here in Amerikastan, however, us sloppy working class jamokes prefer something a bit more accessible.



[Edited on 5-31-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 07:54 AM

My preferred death would be at a Rammstein concert.


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 08:04 AM

Your Beautiful Death will come at the time and place of my choosing. You know this. You've always known. At least now I know what the soundtrack will be as we traverse the Rainbow Bridge together...

I am sensing SynthNight. So be it....



So, drinking lends itself to writing some legally non-actionable stuff on a wrestling website, huh?


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 08:12 AM

Too bad Germany didn't win the war.



(man, Nazi fetishism and deep depression + alcoholism can sure do a number on a guy, the gold hearted guy I used to be....)


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 08:18 AM

Gandalf! wOOt! win!



edit because some lawyer From The Tribe keeps kicking the old videos of jooTube, because they still have to make their shekels off of something from thirty years ago.

[Edited on 5/31/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 08:31 AM

You beautiful disaster. Hail Hydra, mein friend. Hail. Fucking. Hydra.




CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 08:59 AM

I can go for some synth.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 09:03 AM

I surrender. Too pissed. Accept the incoherence that follows. Random shit, etc. etc..


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 09:09 AM

more "authentic" synth, less "chick I want to bang" because let's be honest; If "has synth" and "chick I want to bang" are the only two bits of criteria I'm just gonna be posting CHVRCHES videos.






janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 09:11 AM

Crunk. Hermano. You know what I like.



Soupergroups!



And to all a good night...


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 09:15 AM

Psy fur covers FTW


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 09:16 AM




Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 09:18 AM

one of the few songs that actually mattered


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 09:21 AM

Ooh. I loves me some murky covers. Nice find, Pad. I'm caving to Lauren Mayberry and her pixie charms now.


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 09:23 AM


janerd75 - 5-31-2015 at 09:24 AM

I win. Go to bed, muhfuggers...


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 09:28 AM

Fuck the sex with Kristen Stewart songs. Bring back the Breaking Bad threads, damn ya. I want to die.


CM Crunk - 5-31-2015 at 09:32 AM


Paddlefoot - 5-31-2015 at 09:34 AM


Paddlefoot - 6-4-2015 at 06:30 PM

Might have to do it Friday night instead. Also, armbar, you little fuckers!





[Edited on 6/4/2015 by Paddlefoot]


Count Zero - 6-5-2015 at 07:00 PM

quote:
Originally posted by Paddlefoot
Might have to do it Friday night instead. Also, armbar, you little fuckers!





[Edited on 6/4/2015 by Paddlefoot]

Are you bringing the pepperoni sticks? And some of those jah-lap-eno chips?


Paddlefoot - 6-6-2015 at 01:41 AM

Get me two bags of chips, one Zesty Mordant and one Dressed-All-Over.

Probably gone save the event until tomorrow night. I was out eating garbage turkey and drinking garbage juice with Sgt. Meowenstein early today and now we both have the shits.


janerd75 - 6-6-2015 at 01:56 AM

You're a total slot, aren't you? That's okay, because you're my favorite slot. Mrs. Potato Dick FTW!!!



Kickspit comin' in your face soon!!!! Get your tickets now, ninjas!!!


Paddlefoot - 6-6-2015 at 02:07 AM

That guy at the slots is way too skinny to be me.

We need a theme for tomorrow night. Hits of the 70's, Reservoir Dogs style? A tribute to Karen Carpenter? Studio 54 redux? Give a brother a hand here.

Regardless, it'll be fun! Clowns! Laughs! Balloons for the kids! A petting zoo! A special appearance by Truckasaurus! Rampant anti-Semitism! And a serious panel discussion of the phrase 'once you go black we don't want you back'! Be there or be square!


janerd75 - 6-6-2015 at 02:32 AM



Not Safe For Womyn!!!

Happy Clowns!!!


Dark Friends!!!


And I believe the phrase is, "Once you go black, you can never go back...because no one else will have you.*" Also, my extremely gay neighbor taught me that one so plug those data points into the Offense-O-Tron before someone shits a kitten.

I'd be happy with 70's Hits of any genre. Getting depressed over fading, lost youth tends to cheer me up somehow.



I'll certainly give you a hand, Pad.



*Please direct all complaints to Pad L. Foot and his racist, brainwashing Nazi ways.


Matte - 6-7-2015 at 03:24 AM



favorite line from the preview - "Batista caught me, bought me a... omelette."

[Edited on 6-7-2015 by Matte]


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 04:34 AM

He seems nice.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 04:56 AM

If only Warrior, Voldemort, and Eddie veered in that direction instead of them recreating the ending of Scarface on their way out, what a wonderful HOF world it would be...

Also, just getting home. Shit, shower, put on tux, then it's time to make The Rick regret allowing this nonsense to go on...


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 05:09 AM

The most appalling thing about that vid was it confirming that Americans have a terrible tendency to get drunk off of light beer of all fucking things. Not Teddy, with what appeared to be toking on that pretty awesome gagger he had in his hand, just the others. As a Canadian all I can say is.......wassupwitdat?!?!?!?

Board lag = Teh Rick's revenge. Be nice if the lag at least took our new traditional bender night to not be so annoying.


punkerhardcore - 6-7-2015 at 05:32 AM

quote:
Originally posted by CM Crunk
I blame the fucking tooth that I'm taking antibiotics for.

I've recently developed a fondness for Tank 7 Farmhouse Ale (which is about as hipstery fancy as I'll get with my booze) after finding out that one of those is enough to get decently bit. TWO is a party. Now I'm just having night coffee and getting jittery watching Mr. Show skits on YouTube.



Dude, I've been drinking Tank 7 for over a year, that stuff is the tits. Do yourself a favor and pick up a big bottle of Quadrophenia if you see it, it's damn tasty (and local, to us).


My poison tonight is Lagunitas Little Sumpin' Sumpin'. One of my favs, just delicious.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 05:56 AM






Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 06:07 AM







[Edited on 6/7/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 06:10 AM

Judenrein? Nine! JudenROCKS!!!




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 06:14 AM

David Lee Rothschild? I'm just disappointed that the Triple Crown winning horse was named American Pharoah when American Fuhrer would have been, like, a lot more awesome.

Shia The Beef for the loss, jamokes.

Super-sounds of the 70's it is then.





[Edited on 6/7/2015 by Paddlefoot]


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 06:26 AM

Bad 70's variety show lip syncing for $300, Alex.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 06:30 AM

We're kinda transitioning from American Fuhrer to American Schwarzreich, but who's counting?



The Beef knows no inspirational bounds...


Shia LaBeouf motive Hitler... Do It !! Parodie by MisterBuzz


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 06:38 AM

Man, he's got bad heat, like a male Eva Marie or something.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 06:45 AM

Speaking of dodgy lip-synching and Schwarzkommandants...



I'm fully on board Eva Marie*. TWOODNAAVE FTW!!!



*As long as she limits her speaking, kvetching, and yenta-ing to words like 'yes', 'no', 'okay, that's a bit too tight', and 'no, seriously, were you in an accident or are you like a Chyna or something?"


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 06:46 AM

What? Oh sure, why not?


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 06:49 AM

I hate it when girls get a bad time. Bothers me big time, with lots of interior ripping up being felt and all that. Dumb-ass cavalier from the old days, one supposes. Late 90's/early 00's detour, because of the feels.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 07:08 AM

One 90's detour is allowed, then back to 70's righteousness. Fuck the Zubaz decade. And fuck 'The Ladies', for entirely different and well meaning reasons.




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 07:16 AM

Fug it. Multiple wrecky detours. 90's forever. Fuck you Vince, you and your Divas mean-girl mean.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 07:23 AM

Paddlefoot 3:16 says Vince can kiss his ass. No, seriously, look at the time you posted that. Startin' to smell a little sad in here. Gittin'er back on track with some Lady Lovin'. Fuck, the lead singer of this relatively unknown indie band is a pretty gal. 10/10 would bang. Heh heh, thanks butt I don't need any help or advice landing her. My high levels of situational awareness and confidence are all the aids I need to send her to Heaven.





Did someone say cock?


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 07:30 AM

'Bout time we got around to some Studio 54 keck-worship.



I envy them actually, santorum-eruptions aside. If I was part of the team I'd be having a lot more sex and probably be predisposed to enjoying shopping.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 07:39 AM

HBK's brother is my shit! FTW! What a faaabulous life I would have living here in SoFla if only I smoked the wily polefish in me dark n' tenders. But I do save a lot on AZT, so I guess it all evens out.




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 07:40 AM

That old disco bass seriously owned. Schwarzreich forever!


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 07:49 AM

The Bee All End All. Game, set, match. Crank the speed on the video to 1.25 to really relive the Studio 54 experience!



Mike Myers as Steve Rubell FT Emm Effin W!!!


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 07:57 AM

I like disco bass. I like it a lot. I like it almost as much as J-Roc's mom likes big huge monstrous loin-lashing cunt-crashing black d....whoa, hold on a second fellas, check out this nifty old lady!



Be nice to her and she'll probably pay your monthly AZT prescription for you.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 08:15 AM

Whoops, sorry for the delay. Had a three burner to rangle in the men's room.

I bet you do like it a lot, Lloyd.




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 08:17 AM

By the way, this is the extent of my knowledge of south Florida.



Kind of a land of the fallen MILF's, so to speak.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 08:22 AM

Accurate picture is accurate. For one of the many -ILF iterations down here, of course. Thank you for reminding me how wonderful South Florida is.

Oh, this should cheer us up! Oh. Ohhhhhhh.


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 08:23 AM

Worship at the altar (of a gay man in leather and studs, wearing aviators)!


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 08:28 AM

SHAZAAM!!!!!!




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 08:33 AM

Depression owns, because it's really just a deep realization that's there's really no where to hide.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 08:38 AM

Razor's. Edge.




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 08:42 AM

How dare you open the floodgates, little jabroni. How DARE you?!?!?


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 08:49 AM

It didn't have to come to this, you sombitch. The Nuclear Option. No one wins, damn you.




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 08:55 AM

Nuclear? Bwah-hah-hah-hah! How pathetic! Watch me drop this mini black hole right into the heart of your sun!


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 09:01 AM




Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 09:08 AM

Pissing? Anne Murray? Damn you!


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 09:15 AM





Last call!


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 09:18 AM

Awww.

Do it on a proper stereo and this is seriously some of the best bass lines I've ever heard.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 09:24 AM

Oh okay, a few more. Fuck my liver!


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 09:33 AM



Livers and kidneys heal quickly, even from stab wounds!



5-foot nothing but with a voice of an angel/giant



[Edited on 6/7/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 09:41 AM

Fucking sausage fest in here, man. Where are all the dames? Oh. Right.





Fuck me, now it's last call...


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 09:47 AM

No girls in OO anymore. Just some kind of a Wil Wheaton sausage fest. Ah, well. Germans!


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 09:54 AM






Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 10:08 AM

Oh, you! Tee-hee-hee!

Back to the depression we began with tonight. D-Day remembrance today, up here in Soviet Canuckistan anyway.


janerd75 - 6-7-2015 at 10:15 AM





To D-Day! L'chaim! Oy vey! Latkes!


Paddlefoot - 6-7-2015 at 10:25 AM

It's 6:25 Florida time. We beat the sunrise together. Go to bed now, brother.


Paddlefoot - 6-13-2015 at 03:21 AM

Gotta do it tonight. Got an appointment on Sunday. Hijinkery begins soon. Nyuck Nyuck Nyuck !
!


janerd75 - 6-13-2015 at 06:36 AM

Had a bit of a rough day today, patnah. Figure I'm gonna try to turn in early tonight. I will, however, leave you with these.




Paddlefoot - 6-13-2015 at 06:45 AM

Aw.

Oh well, next time we'll do girls night.




Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 04:21 AM


Top Three!



[Edited on 6/21/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 04:43 AM

Sup, T

Awwwwwwwwwwwww, Shucky Ducky quack quack, Greek style yogit in yo crack!

But first, a word from our sponsor...




Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 04:53 AM

Thet comer-see-al would hev been a lawt moah convincin' if Bobbeh Fley spoke with an appropreeate Foghorn Leghown akkcent. Heah's hopin' thet Areeanne beeutay thet was awn Laww Ann Ohadh: Theh SUV takes thet boayh foah awl he's woth.

[Edited on 6/21/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 04:55 AM

Git reddy, baybeh, 'cause janned cookin' up thum thauthidge ath we thpeak, daddeh!







I like how his hair looks like a Darth Vader helmet made out of ramen noodles. Nah Look...Look thun, nah lithin widthz ya faith. Look, you mah thun, boai an' I...HAM YO DADDEH, BAYBEH!!!


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 04:58 AM

An oldie and a smelly German goodie. Someone posted this here years ago. Much like the guy who tied some wires from an electric train set control box ot his cock, this one is something that deserves never to be forgotten.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 05:14 AM

Oh man, the night is still so young for it to turn into a shit show already.




Fo' Duthtaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay....



[Edited on 6-21-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 05:16 AM

Celebrity lip sync! ooh! ooh!


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 05:22 AM

Ya oughta be banned for that last one. Didn't you read the Wankipedia on shit posting before you joined up? You ruined my whole night, nutella-fan.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 05:32 AM



Speakina noo-telluh, daddeh...nuhthin go down, an ah mean nuhthin go dowwwwn Duthtay Rhoadzth thoat smootha then a Cherry Faggy. I hunn'ed foxtheth wit Duketh n' Lawdzth, I driven mahtheff ta Armory Hallzth in Edsell Fawdzth. But ain't no yogit, I thaid they ain't no yogit like dat Faggy Greek t'bring Kingth to dey neethz an givva commun man wat he pleaze.

Nah Ric Fleyuh, he like t'come ot heyuh, Tonuh Shavonnuh, he like ah come ot heyuh wit his Yo PLEY! Nah you anna hussmunnnn like t'pley, Ric Fleyuh. Y'LIKE T'PLEY!!! I doan pley Ric! I DOAN PLEY! I come heyuh fuh bidniss, boai! Thath whai me an mah tag team pottna, Bobba Fley, a good man, a hadd workkin' man, a travellin' man, a real ladiezth man, if you weeyul, ah challengin' YOU an' any an alla ya hussmun, Ric Fleyuh, to a yogit onna pole match, baybeh!

Nah Bobba Fley, he a mad man, he march himsef right inta hadd times an doan give no thawt, NO thawt udda conthequenthes, baybeh . Me an Bobba Fley gonna pump you anna hussmun fulla dat Faggy Greek, daddeh. Hodd times commin' at YOO, Tulliblanchid! Comin' at YOO Ahn Annathin! Comin' at YOO Olay Annathin! Comin' at YOO JeyJey Dillin! And especially comin' all ovah YOO Ric Fleyuh!

An y'all make thure ta thtop bah consethshins an git yoo thumma Duthtay's Cole Bluddit Thauthidge or poppa refreshin' an' thoothin' Cherry Faggy down yah thoat! Foah dolla moah git yoo somma dem thweet Joja peecanz tuh mix eyun yuh yogit an' buthta nuddy Faggy in ya mouf! Get allah yo keeyudzth ta thuck a creamy one down they thoat too! Lett'em git it all ovah they thweet liddle chin an cheekth an' tell'em Duthtay wanna thee them enjoi that Faggy all ovah they faith, daddeh! Thith been Duthtay Rhoadzth an' Tonuh Shavonnuh fuh Cole Bluddit Thauthidge an' Faggy Greek yogit.

Thith ith not tha greateth Duthtay promo inna world, nah, thith iyuth jutha tribute, baybeh.

Relevant part starts at aboot 7:40 in. How in the fuck did that fat man move so goddamn fast?



You drew first blood, not me! Up your butt with a flute, holmes!


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 05:59 AM





With that kind of a cool dry wit you should be writing scripts for Garth Ennis' Crossed.

Let's get back to girl's night. Fuck you Alexander!



[Edited on 6/21/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 06:09 AM

Ain't gonna lie, daddeh, I like that fucking song.






Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 06:36 AM

I'm out of ideas probably because I'm too drunk already or, possibly, from some kind of nutella-shits induced PTSD. Kick start me or something, dammit.

[Edited on 6/21/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 06:46 AM

Saturday Night thusfar: poop flute, Duthtay, Ladiezth Nite, an' Gaath Ennith, baybey!



Oh yes ithz ladiezth night!!!





Genre switch or stick with the dames?


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 06:50 AM

This night is just screaming out for an indulgence of random assholerly.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 07:05 AM

Did someone say assholery?






Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 07:10 AM

Now my butt hurts.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 07:25 AM

B-b-butt hurts? That's not how you're supposed to pull the lever on the VLTs, y'know. Besides, you wanted this, baybeh dall. Itzth no meanth yeth tiime, daddeh!

Mr. The Rick should have an OO After Dark option so things can get safely cornholed up in this sombitch. I need guidance because I don't know if I can be trusted to roam these Modless wastelands without posting something that will draw the attention of at least several law enforcement agencies.




Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 07:53 AM

Now I'm scared. And too pissed to attempt to be clever. I wish there'd been an Objectivist club back in high school when I was young, get as far away from Jesus as I possibly could. Lifeless eyes, like a doll's eyes....


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 08:09 AM

You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. 'Cept for gold. Ayn's lifejacket's the only one I wear now...





I dig that Lorde song, bee tee dubya. Whence 'Royals' got too overwhelming I wanted to see if she had anything else in the tank. She did.


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 08:32 AM

You know when I was most frightened? When the gypsy said my life would be long. This is why I watch as many dog videos as I can.


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 08:48 AM

Brilliant Canadian bastards have some good moments. Oh such sadness, such delightful sadness.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 08:56 AM

I will never forgive that gypsy fortune teller for leading me astray. I fucking hate the heat!



Somethin' 'bout a strong woman whut don't need no man, tho...





I don't follow this nonsense program other than scanning for the Smirking Whore of Highgarden's sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet tiddies on the web and the fact that they had a live action porn star amongst the cast, but...................y'know whut, I'll be honest...I had a thought going here but I'm a touched pissed right now and I can even begin to 'member whut it was. Uh, girl power I guess?

OMG, I would disappoint her so hard...



LOL, it's funny because that's my first name.



You know nothing Pad Foot.


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 09:09 AM

No. I know everything.



[Edited on 6/21/2015 by Paddlefoot]


Paddlefoot - 6-21-2015 at 09:26 AM



mark-out at 10:25, like the entire NWO hitting the ring.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 09:44 AM

Glorious. I see we're going for the soft landing. Quite.


janerd75 - 6-21-2015 at 10:10 AM

This is literally how classy south Florida was in the 80's. I'm not even fucking around, bro bro. Fo' realz.



Oh LAWD! GoodNIGHT!


Paddlefoot - 6-22-2015 at 07:36 PM

I'd ask why none of the other guys are joining in for this new OO treydisheeyon, if you weeeeel. Then again, after a day's hungover hindsight, it's probably no more complex than we scared away all the straights.


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 04:05 AM

Should we have Pseudo-Eroticism Night, in honour of dreck ranging from 50 Shades to True Blood. OOOOOOhhh, yeah, babay! This bear is ready to par-tay!


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 05:04 AM

What mean pseu-pseu-pseudio, Canada Man? Or hadn't you heard? The Colonies have given into wholesale buggery and legal debauchery so we're gonna party accordingly. I don't know what other than Hedwig clips and Queen/Elton/George Michael videos we're gonna be playing though.

I only wish Kareem and Michael Sam could make it for our special day.

Just aboot getting home from the fights, cleaning up, and putting on my face. Only the best for you, eh? Better be some more party bois showin' up 'cause I didn't buy all these hamsters and lube for nothin'.


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 05:21 AM

As Rodney Dangerfield said to Ted Knight in the infamous marina scene in Caddyshack, 'hey! it's my buddy!'.





(flying my Stone Cold Steve Austin Smoking Skull logo on a rainbow flag as we speak....)


Big Bank Hank - 6-28-2015 at 05:22 AM

HEY I"M DRUNK TOO!!!!

I'm a straight though... Am allowed?

Fro the record, I would fuck Justin Bieber int he ass, if, and ONLY IF, he is a butt secks virgin. Not because I'm into butt secks viringity (or butt secks for that matter), but just to say I'm the one who took Justin Biber's buttt secvks virginity.


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 05:49 AM

All are welcum, twink!


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 06:07 AM

Transjanerd is the Belle of this Ball...







Someone's getting prolapsed tonight...


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 06:20 AM

Probably the reason why Leo Kruger finally fired the Rosebuds.


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 06:24 AM

Is your tux pressed or what?


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 06:53 AM

leave me alone in the corner with molly!


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 07:06 AM

I wanna be normal again!


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 07:09 AM





S'matter with you. Dudes kissin' n' shit. Not all gheys are guys you sexist fuck. Show some love for the ladies, troglodyte.



Pad I am so sorry you know how I get when I'm sauced and baked and nothing means anything anymore and I'm writing this really small so only you can read this, but no one else can read this, right? What's that? No, I haven't had to many highs tonight and I resent the accusation. Look, are we getting not gay gay internet wrestling forum married or what because I can't hold these beads in much longer without Pollock-ing our new 1000 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets.


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 07:12 AM

Jackson Pollack is invited to our wedding? Thank you thank you thank you my brave brave beast.

I wish I was gay. Lots of sex and might even be able to appreciate the shopping mall. Twelve years old and you're already evil as fuck. Twelve years old? FUCK. YOU.

[Edited on 6/28/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 07:17 AM

Everything's on the table no matter how much it hurts...





In my experience, The Ghey down here amounts to Dick Handshakes As A Formal Way Of Greeting, and then happiness cums shortly thereafter. Dual income, no kids, interchangeable wardrobes, no pregnancy worries, fabulous get togethers, husband swapping, the works. Have Ghey neighbors, can confirm. All this plenty and yet I was inescapably blessed with Sarlacc adoration.

Hold on a sec...What's that, Miss? I couldn't hear you over the sound of your ass.



[Edited on 6-28-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 07:27 AM

no no no no no no no watermelon no



at this stage you should understand I'm pretty fucking pissed and no longer responsible for my behaviour the Koch brothers made their fortune from supplying the slave labour to Siberian jenkem mines save me axl save me


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 07:43 AM

What people don't know is the Koch's support for the Luos over the hated Kikuyu has been occluded by guess who? That's right, Ted Cruz, who is Barlacc Osama's Illuminati betrothed husband sent forth from Agents of Jessie Ventura Lizard Men to handle eminent domain disputes negotiated by Al Sharpton for the simple goal of controlling the flow of KFC production. What, you thought those new KFC commercials starring Darrel Hammond as Col. Sanders weren't a message to the shock troops?!?! You plebian. Wake up!!!



Fuck, I could really pile on with some jenkum right now. Had to be 'Patience', didn't it. Got like 87 and a half early-teen janerd memories attached to that one...

[Edited on 6-28-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 07:48 AM

all of life is hell death is a gift



janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 07:52 AM

That's the spirit!!!



We fought the law and the law won...


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 08:10 AM

hell hell hell


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 08:20 AM

You. Love. That. Dreary. Fucking. Song. GOSH!






Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 08:24 AM

I've always been the poor doomed fucking bastard keeping to himself in the corner.


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 08:38 AM

No one puts Paddlefoot in the corner...



Time for some refreshments!!!



On A Professional Note: Unfortunately, I think it's necessary to go caveman and gif trainwreck the living dick out of the legit threads again. This should be a fucking sausage slam right now and instead it's two depressed and/or deranged ts kvetching and yenta-ing over the details on how we're gonna plug ourselves. If yoo wheeel, daddeh! WOO!!!!!

Cheer up! Titties!!!!!!


Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 08:54 AM

gah fug id time to die


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 09:10 AM

Izth yew da cole bluddit thauthage maka', oha izth yew izthin't, baybeh!




Paddlefoot - 6-28-2015 at 09:44 AM

fug drunk canuckistani


janerd75 - 6-28-2015 at 09:54 AM

Time to peace the fuck out, Cana-holmes.



One last surprise.


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 04:16 AM




Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 04:24 AM

Too bad Ten Masked Men never did a cover of Lee Greenwood because that would be, like, fucking choice right now.

Happy 4th, American buhhhhhhddddies! Try not to lose too many eyeballs and fingers to hilarious, yet incredibly touching, fireworks injuries!


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 04:27 AM

Let's hear it for the best country in the world!!!!!!!




Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 04:38 AM

I love America, and Americans, in spite of your wacky and self-destructive way. Couldn't ask for better neighbours in the entire world. Of course, I'm from the sane part of Canada. Talk to some Frenchie McQueeb and you'd probably get a different answer altogether.



I figure your only real problem is that you're long overdue for doing a Robespierre on the 1%, and everybody knows those fuckers are more than deserving of it.

[Edited on 7/5/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 04:55 AM

Watch it with the mollycoddling compliments, bub. Do you want a sampling of Freedom up there? Some nice tar sands you got there. Be a shame if someone came to liberate it. No, serioulsly, we're gonna be your Mexicans soon. Brace yourselves, whiners are coming.





This Great Land™ summed up in one picture...


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 05:07 AM

quote:
Originally posted by janerd75
Watch it with the mollycoddling compliments, bub. Do you want a sampling of Freedom up there? Some nice tar sands you got there. Be a shame if someone came to liberate it. No, serioulsly, we're gonna be your Mexicans soon. Brace yourselves, whiners are coming.


You guys already own half the fucking place up there in Ft McMeth. And just because I like you doesn't mean that I like you looking at Johnny Canuck in the same way you look at Mexicans selling oranges by the side of the road. Nuke the Saudis soon for me please so I can get back to work. And pay the rent. And buy food.

quote:
This Great Land™ summed up in one picture...


I beg to differ.


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 05:17 AM

Back to the drinkin' myself blind aspect of things......


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 05:34 AM

Courtney Stodden. It doesn't get any more 'Murican than that. And we can't blow our dear allies the Saudi's just yet as we need them to hedge the Ayatollahs, because all the 9/11 brohams came from Saud(REDACTEDREDACTEDREDACTEDREDACTED)...Gooood Bless AH-MER-I-KAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!




Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 05:41 AM


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 05:47 AM

Lissin, Pallafut, lissin. Yew dont,,,yew dont no nuthin' bout Merka, see when George Bush W. Bush and Black Osama threw tarps on bailouts and ghey married each other...heh heh, Pallfut, s'funny name, Pallafut...




Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 05:51 AM

izza.....braaaaack!.......izzza bah mahfah....fuggggaffff ya .....fugggin fugggersss..




janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 06:08 AM

Drunk Uncle and Lil' Drunk uncle, just what the doctor orde...."The uploader has not made this video available in your cuntry". Mother. Fucker.


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 06:13 AM

You kidding me? Every SNL video is unavailable in Canada, but that one I posted is magically unavailable in the US? Jeebus H. Christ, when will NBC/GE quit being such assholes about trivial things like this?


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 06:24 AM

You nuke* NBC/GE and I promise you I will personally make you Saddam of Alberta and kinetically bombard the entirety of the middle least with so much tungsten from our "secret" X37B spaceship that it'll look like a million T-1000's shot their loads all over the desert. Soar like an' Eagle, muhfuggerz...







*Flaming moose dooks. We know you guys are too nice to throw down like that.


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 06:44 AM

A better part of America. USS Iowa coming home for the last time to San Francisco bay before being turned into a museum ship. They restored all that teak deck wood back in the early 1980's to it's original state. In World War Two it was painted a deep blue for camouflage purposed.



anyhoo, back to the entertaining cynicism/alcoholism


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 06:57 AM

Aye, she's a fine ship, Laddie, but at least you have this...



As per tradition down here, we usually make this out of either flakka or black tar heroin and roll it in beach sand for a tasty summer treat.

I live five minutes away from here...




Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 07:07 AM

Calgary's not too bad for that kind of Broward behaviour. Edmonton is rife with it at any given time though. Ft. McMeth*, aka Hell's Sno-Globe, is like the epicentre of it though. Go to Boomtown and the best thing I can think to do with my life is take the kind of drugs that make me want to eat someone's face off? Awwwww yeeaaahhhhhh!

*been there multiple times, don't like it, all the screaming at night in the distance interrupts my sleep too much

also fuck off



[Edited on 7/5/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 07:25 AM

S'funny, but TL;DR I am doing my damnedest to move to central Wisconsin because relatives, farms, wide open spaces, fishing, a better class of redneck/biker outlaw and son of a bitch whattya know...fucking heroin/meth is a major problem up there. Like, does anybody throw down with reefers any more or that's just not taboo enough a high to fit in with whatever faggoty* nihilistic circle people run in these days?

Wait, been where multiple times?

Time for a quick giggle!



Aww, time for sadness again.





*Relax, errbody. The Royal faggoty, not the ghey version. Jesus take the wheel...and expand my methane aperture because life is gonna ram itself up my obsolete ass anyway. Please enjoy this heartfelt "apology".



[Edited on 7-5-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 07:40 AM

Now how can I top that, ya fuck.


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 07:53 AM

By steering into the curve James Dean U.S.S. Iowa California style!!!



Srsly, am drrnk, is Ft. McMeth some unknown province up there or are you reefering to Ft. Laudy, the Land O' Janerd?

You fucking Moose...


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 08:03 AM

Ft. McMurray. Heart of the oilsands. Hell on earth literally, figuratively, and every other kind of -lly you can think of. Been there too many times myself and came out of there the worse for it. Was fucked up going in, came out all twisted and misanthropophic after. Just ugly, nasty, mean, stupid, and every other thing that makes this world a worse place to be in. Kind of like a Southern states GOP meeting when you think of it.



Good voice on the big guy. But Sheldon still managed to make me cry.


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 08:28 AM

Heavens. To. Betsy. Are...are you Wolverine? I just met Farooq and Andy Kaufman's foil and now I find out you're fucking Wolverine*.





Fucking A.I.D.S. God's "gift" to the inelasticity of the rectum.

*See, grammatically that can be taken one of two ways. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you aren't in possession of Adamantium condoms if such a thing is even possible. Butt maybe I'm wrong, I don't know. Just make sure he doesn't sneeze when he fingers you.


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 09:06 AM

Figured out the problem here is that I burn really bright but only in fits and starts, a moment of brilliance that dies out, flickers again later, just to die out again. Not stupid, at least not duh-duh-Trump's got my vote-der-duh-duh stupid, but just too old to keep it on all the time. Turned 48 today, oldest OOster on the roster now. But you light up constant, like the sun. Rises. Sets. Rinse. Repeat. I can't do that. too many flame outs during the day.

Oh, well, such as it is. You're a good kid, don't let them tell you otherwise. Saturday night shared alcoholism is one of the few things I look forward to anymore!





[Edited on 7/5/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 09:29 AM

The Molson's too strong or whut? N-Word, if I may, or Enward if you want to be all P.C. aboot it, I'm a month or so out from forty and merc* is 51. You are not damned.







*I am so, so, so fucking sorry merc. But you did this to yourself. Fuck the Pats. Because soggy balls and homicidal TE's. I love you. I'm sorry.


Paddlefoot - 7-5-2015 at 09:58 AM

the dogs on main street howl because they understand


janerd75 - 7-5-2015 at 10:14 AM

Let's be pleasantly paranoid together, shall we?






Paddlefoot - 7-11-2015 at 06:33 AM

Is it safe to mix muscle relaxers with beer because if it isn't I'll have to take this Saturday night off. Hurt the fuck out of my back somehow and am doing several rounds of trigger point injections to fix it. On top of it I'm dosing on Robaxacets too. If it's safe I'll be here like clockwork tomorrow night. If not it won't be until the following weekend because I don't want to start shitting/pissing blood, have my stomach lining start to bleed, or any other kind of shitting, pissing, bleeding, or stomach lining disintegration.

This is new traydisheeyon is about all I have to look forward to anymore.


janerd75 - 7-11-2015 at 07:34 AM



Pad, can you please take the dick off your face?




Paddlefoot - 7-11-2015 at 07:43 AM

I was a rent-a-cop for a few months in my first job out of high school. I don't remember it being that much fun. Sure caught up on my sleep though.


janerd75 - 7-11-2015 at 07:55 AM

I hope you got to baton goofy and unruly teenage fucks until they pissed blood. How did you hurt your back? What was his name?


Paddlefoot - 7-11-2015 at 08:13 AM

The worst we ever did on our two-man teams was steal any of the porn mags that were left in the cafeteria by the shift workers. Mind you, this was in the days of the wide-open 1980's before cameras were installed everywhere so it was easy to get away with all sorts of crazy after-hours shit in an empty office building or warehouse. In hindsight we should have gone all Goodfellas and fucking stolen everything that wasn't tied down. Rifled through a lot of desks, that's for sure. That and smoked a lot of dope on the roof of the one 40-story office tower we were assigned to. It was braindead work so we deliberately behaved as braindead as possible, as any 18 and 19-year olds will invariably do. The way I look at it now the company that hired us was just plain foolish to ever trust us.

Don't know what I did to the back. Just a growing pain until it became excruciating over the last few days. Canuckistan's vaunted health care system is terrible for things like this. Great for surgeries, OK for emergencies involving blood loss or puking all over the place, utterly terrible for any kind of soft-tissue injury. I could go spend 20 hours waiting in emerg to be seen by a doctor to receive a prescription and the usual "if you lost some weight it would go away on it's own" kind of helpful advice. Hence I immediately go to a massage therapist or a naturopath when this kind of thing happens (the real ones with certificates and degrees, not the charlatans with the trinkets, incense, beads, and juice-cleansers). Had the needle treatment a few years back when I tore up my hip (10 out of 10 on the agony scale, that episode was) so I know the same thing will work on my back after three or fours sessions of getting jabbed. Jabbed, that is, not jagged.


janerd75 - 7-11-2015 at 08:25 AM

If I had to do it all over again and still end up in the same place, I'd at least want to relive the 80's knowing what I know now about how easy it was to get away with shit. I would have fucked off and fucked up far more to my advantage. My god the fucking lack of cameras alone made it worth it. Jesus, the EMP soon. Please.

Are you going to be catatonic tomorrow night? I may or may not be due to UFC excitement. Most likely late arrival.



His name was Pepito, wasn't it. You perro, you.


Paddlefoot - 7-11-2015 at 08:42 AM

Depends on how the back feels. If I don't have to dose out on the muscle relaxers I'll probably do it. If it hurts too much and I need the pills I probably won't. I'm a tad too old to risk freaking out, or falling down and hurting myself worse than it already is, by mixing beer with medication.


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 05:26 AM

Ah, what the hell. Let's go for broke!


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 06:27 AM

Fookin' Foytin' Oyrish keepin' me from my betrothed...


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 06:33 AM

Hey! My buddy! Save me a parking space, I'm coming in (after I get head from Amelia Earhart)!


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 06:49 AM

Always with the hits, this Pad L. Foot guy. Why the fuck, if it didn't involve snow, was every dopey, funny, cult comedy shot with in ten miles of my house in the 80's?

'Nerds, muhfuggers. Ja-Nerds.


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 06:56 AM

Ja! nerds! Ja!





la
lalala
lalalalalalala


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 07:08 AM

Remembering "better" days is both fun AND painful! LOLOLO





Oh goodness, this is going to get really outta hand, real fast isn't it?


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 07:38 AM

Bobbeh Fley? Yew still theyare, tigah?


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 07:44 AM







How's the back? You upgrade to horse tranquilizers? Ask Pepito to shut 'er down at three quatter shaft?


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 07:50 AM

Saw a doc today and got some T-3's to carry me through the worst of it. Had two with dinner about six hours ago. Not going to have anymore until tomorrow. This bender has a nice little weird tinge attached to it though which is coming from about a weeks worth of various pills, if yew weeeeeeeeeel, swimming around in my system. Has that nice feel like that time back around 1990 when I conched back three hits of acid, drank a flat of beer, and went outside during a lighting storm. Aw yeah, bizzatch, awww yeaaaahhhhhh........


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 08:02 AM





oilpatch theme song 2015


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 08:16 AM

T-3's. You lucky Canuckistani. Best I can do here in SoFlo without insurance is some flakka, kush, or what whatever I can beg, borrow, or work for in this tarless sandpit. Figure when the time comes I ain't goin' oot like some nancy boy middle aged fuck and they can just roll me in a ditch somewhere. Apparently, it wasn't a wise play to pay no mind to the drawbacks of my superhero power of transforming from a twitchy 6 foot tall honkaloid into a 5 foot tall Messican whut crawls around running low voltage wires in attics in 120 degree heat all day.



Fun story: Driving home after the fights, when I turned onto the main drag that leads to my house, there was a kindly and sweet lil' brown child, no older than 4 or 5 mind you, riding his bike in the road whilst his overseers were playing cards around an old dilapidated table right next to said street. At 2 in the fucking morning. Dunno why that matters now but gat did that piss me off. I suppose I'm da bad guy, Chico, for even noticing it I guess.

Ft. Lauderdale and Vinci are sister cities.




Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 08:29 AM

quote:
I suppose I'm da bad guy, Chico, for even noticing it I guess.


No such things as bad guys anymore, dawg. I figured from your Batman/Superman thread that if those two assholes wanted to fight some real evil they'd just go around the world and kill every banker and commerce faculty graduate they could get thier hands on. Robespierre was right, nigga.



[Edited on 7/12/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 08:43 AM

Ultimately, I think that's what's going to finally bring R's, D's, I's, conservatives, liberals, etc. together is realizing how fucked we all are due to the machinations of nefarious gangster banksters and their sundry political puppets they control. Bildebergs, Rothchilds, Illuminati Lizard Men FTW!!!! Jesucristo I need to get laid. With a ladybox. Golly, I wonder what kind of list I'm on. Don't think the N.S.A. has a goon squad for broken down jerkasses whut post too many gifs on wrestling websites, so I guess I'm okay.



Yeshua, I can see the steel wool bush through the power trunks. Also, yay for Sailor Jerry! Also2, yay for sparking one!


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 09:03 AM

pRetty cool rant here. Saw a vid where they said an asteroid 500 km across would literally peel the skin off the Earth where it landed. I'm cheering for the asteroid. yay asteroid!



Fuck it.


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 09:24 AM

I understand Carlin more and more on a cellular level the older I get. The more fucks that ghost themselves from my body, the better. I do want to live. I just have no reason to. #LOLJNRD



This whole fucking thread deserves bOOrdies Honors.




Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 09:49 AM

quote:
This whole fucking thread deserves bOOrdies Honors.




Got that right.



I like dogs. I want dogs to survive the asteroid. Be a lot better world if it were run by dogs.

quote:
"I think human consciousness, is a tragic misstep in evolution. We became too self-aware, nature created an aspect of nature separate from itself, we are creatures that should not exist by natural law. We are things that labor under the illusion of having a self; an accretion of sensory, experience and feeling, programmed with total assurance that we are each somebody, when in fact everybody is nobody. Maybe the honorable thing for our species to do is deny our programming, stop reproducing, walk hand in hand into extinction, one last midnight - brothers and sisters opting out of a raw deal."

Rustin Cohle


[Edited on 7/12/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 09:52 AM

I'm more of a hyperinflation/EMP guy myself. EMP would immediately be more fun given the Walking Dead type implications. I would eat so, so, so, so many people.


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 10:00 AM

Read 'One Second After' By Bill Forstchen. He's a buddy of Newt Gingrich, and therefore an asshole, but at least the book was funny and accurate. Just to cheer you up after the Norks blew off an EMP off the eastern seaboard at least 90% of the population of southern Florida died. Mostly from the air conditioning ending and the rest from the diabetes mediation going bad from no more refridgeration being available.

Any gifs of Cigarette Man from the first X-Files movie yelling "burn it!" because that's all I'm sticking around for anymore. Burn it bitch!



[Edited on 7/12/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 10:09 AM

I don't get spooked out much, but I just finished reading that book literally yesterday, motherfucker. I pert near cried when Washington bit it when the Posse attacked. Those Posse a-holes were going all Terminus on people and it was way fucking scarier than anything Walking Dead ever did. Glad the Professor got to eventually poon Makala though. Yeah, I gotta get the fuck outta Florida.


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 10:23 AM

Bedtime for Bonzo.




Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 10:23 AM

They figured that 60 to 100 million died in World War Two. The sick part isn't all those deaths, the sick part is that all those bodies even way back when didn't even make a dent in the herd.



Hopefully the asteroid come soon. Don't want the primates escaping off this world to infect the rest of the galaxy with their sickness.


janerd75 - 7-12-2015 at 10:28 AM

Goodnight and good luck.


Paddlefoot - 7-12-2015 at 10:43 AM


Dyn-O-Mite - 7-19-2015 at 03:22 AM

Couldn't decide where this belonged, Saturday Night DRUNK THREAD seemed as good of place as any.

Pretty awesome discovery watching baseball right now -- Josh Reddick now comes to the plate to Seth Rollins' theme music...


janerd75 - 7-19-2015 at 05:47 AM






janerd75 - 7-19-2015 at 07:33 AM

Because drinking alone is a perfectly cromulent decision...




Paddlefoot - 7-19-2015 at 07:51 PM

It was in the plan until the back pain kicked in yesterday afternoon and shot up to a 10 out of 10 on the agony scale. Add in that the elevator in the apartment building broke on Friday, and hasn't been fixed yet, and using the stairs up and down from the 4th floor sent a jolt through my gluteus like being stabbed with an X-acto knife, not to mention referred pain down in the ankle that felt like a combination of being electrocuted and having the skin on my lower leg set on fire, with ever step I took. Needless to say, thanks to a mountain of horrid BS, I was robbed of one of the few things I have left during the week to look forward to and my entire weekend was ruined.

Next weekend fer shure. Sorry.


janerd75 - 7-19-2015 at 08:41 PM

So, if I'm to infer incorrectly by altering the context for my amusement, this is essentially what your weekend was like?





Well, I hope you find a way to extinguish your flaming back pain. Most likely with drugs. Probably hookers. Hopefully some of the truck stop variety who never no mind the rough stuff and contusions so long as the crank for the yank is pure cut and you give them a warm dry place to try to forget the children they gave up long long ago to some geeked up bikers in a guns for speed deal that went south down Moose Jaw way.

See you next Saturday. Until then, I'll be hangin' out at the mall doin' what I do.


Paddlefoot - 7-19-2015 at 09:14 PM

Oddly enough all of those are fairly accurate. Crawling up four flights of stairs with a near-paralyzed lower back while carrying a pack of beer in one hand and a pizza in the other would have been damn hilarious to try to do. Even moreso as I needed my hands to hold the bannister with one and to brace myself against the wall with the other. Shows how fucked the situation with the busted elevator is that by not getting drunk I ended up feeling worse because the weekly session with it's accompanying alcohol saturation was one of the few things that can help the damn muscles to loosen up at all. FACK!!!

(not sure though if the joke is supposed to go "I was at a truck stop and and ECW show broke out" or "I thought I was at an ECW show but it turned out to just be the parking lot at a truck stop". either way wherever I was all the women there looked like Francine and Elektra)

Also, nothing like the referred pain caused by false sciatica. It felt like ah wuz gettin' flayed by the skeelled knives of that good ol' boy Bobbeh Fley, behbeh.



[Edited on 7/19/2015 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 7-19-2015 at 09:33 PM

Is there any way I can get you to wear a GoPro around for a while?



You never know, it could work out.


Paddlefoot - 7-19-2015 at 09:49 PM

Maybe a drunk night combined with binge-watching parkour-gone-wrong on Ridiculousness would be appropriate to the times we live in.


Paddlefoot - 7-24-2015 at 05:41 AM

Get ready. You know it's coming........wOOOOOOOO!


janerd75 - 7-24-2015 at 06:22 AM

Takin' cayuh bidness...





For the younger children in the audience, Jezebeyal = Cunt, baybeh!



[Edited on 7-24-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 7-24-2015 at 01:21 PM

Bobbeh Fley - it's gonna be shaymefull!
Guy Fieri - it's gonna be shaymefull!
Gohdon Ramsaay - it's gonna be shamefull!
And Nijello Lawson, you jezzybelle, you bet you last silvah dollah it's gonna be shaymefull!

The best way to lose a job, if one actually has one, would be to have your brain stuck in Dusty mode and go all Foghorn Leghorn during a major department meeting. They'd think you were a nut but they'd be talking about you for years afterwards.


janerd75 - 7-26-2015 at 06:02 AM



IS EVERYONE READY FOR HOGAN APPRECIATION NIGHT AND BY EVERYONE I MEAN PAD L. FOOTS?!?!?!?!!?!? AREST THOU READY TO BE CAUGHT WITHIN THE WALLS OF JANICO?!?!?! WHY THE FUCK AM I YELLING?!?!?!? Ah yes, libations. Does it every time.




Paddlefoot - 7-26-2015 at 06:03 AM

No hijinkery tonight unfortunately. Beer with painkillers is kind of fun. Beer with harsh anti-inflammatories is kind of let's-lower-Owen-from-the-rafters-in-a-defective-harness levels of stupid.


janerd75 - 7-26-2015 at 06:09 AM

W-w-what's that smell?






Paddlefoot - 7-26-2015 at 06:14 AM

Hey, it ruined my night too. Had two beers, hadn't had an anti-inflamm since last night, and still managed to just about barf in the sink from a massive burst of nausea. I want drunk thread to be a happy place, not a nauseating where's-the-Gravol one. Son, I am disappoint.


janerd75 - 7-26-2015 at 06:19 AM

Absolutely no worries, Cap'n. Just get healthy, dry your liver out, enjoy your backiotomy, and sit back and watch me potentially flame out in epic fashion. Hogan will still be a shitbird tomorrow. Now, lemmie see, what shall I get up to? Ah yes...








Paddlefoot - 7-26-2015 at 06:28 AM

Just had to double-dose two high-strength Gravols to calm it down. Jeebus, didn't think this would happen. And I had a great playlist all lined up for tonight too. FACK!


janerd75 - 7-26-2015 at 06:38 AM

Shh, shh, shhhhhh. There there, there there. Worry you not, sugertits. There's always drinks to be had on the morrow. And the morrow after that. And the morrow after that and so on and so forth. Provided I don't go all Leaving Las Vegas, of course....





The fuck is a Gravol before I hafta look it up on Gooble? Can't you get no weed up there? Y'all ned some brothers up yonder, eh?


Paddlefoot - 7-26-2015 at 06:44 AM

Anti-nausea tablets. Generally work pretty good and cause drowsiness for quality sleep too. Behind the counter now because apparently *BEEP-BEEP* MORAL PANIC! MORAL PANIC! *BEEP-BEEP* some kids use it to get high and/or something in it can be used to make meth. I can't smoke anymore so the ganja remedy is out of the question. Damn, what a shitty night.


janerd75 - 7-26-2015 at 07:12 AM

No ganja workin' man blues, I'd guess. Behind the counter. In Canada. Jesus, I didn't think there was anything stonger than meth or Molson's up dere. I'm also assuming you can get either of those with a side of back bacon at any Tim Horton's you hitch your moose to. What a magical place. S'okay, down here in Latino U.S. they lock up the disposable razors and anti-histamines for, shit, I dunno, the discriminating meth addict that likes a clean scab shave before a dealer throat checks their teeth outta the way for a frantic gum job. I'd invite you down here, but we gotta thing right now with choosing up sides Gangs of New York style, so you're gonna hafta pick which flag you wanna go to battle under. Choose. Fucking. Wisely.


punkerhardcore - 7-26-2015 at 08:21 AM

I was just flipping around the TV, and stopped on 12 Monkeys... and then literally see janerd's avatar right at that exact moment on my television. Man.


janerd75 - 7-26-2015 at 08:30 AM

Janerd is Legion. We are everywhere. We are nowhere. We have also been drinking.


janerd75 - 8-2-2015 at 06:36 AM







[Edited on 8-2-2015 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 8-2-2015 at 12:18 PM

See PM. Lots of troubles last few days. Sorry.


janerd75 - 8-2-2015 at 05:53 PM

Pad's a strong independent Canadian who don't need no man. Just a sad back and knowledge that Gawd loves you. To death. And He's gonna make sure you get there as soon as possible. #Paddlestrong




Paddlefoot - 8-2-2015 at 06:34 PM

Lately I've been asking Him to kill me.


janerd75 - 8-2-2015 at 08:00 PM

I sure wish I had sum ahs craym tuh giv ya, Lootennant Pad.





If you're feeling low, and especially if you have a headache, I'd crank this one to 11 and mellow right the fuck out.


janerd75 - 8-9-2015 at 06:26 AM


punkerhardcore - 8-9-2015 at 06:34 AM

World Market is having a 20% off beer sale this weekend, so me and the lady stocked up. I'm currently enjoying a Stone* Delicious IPA.

*Curious if beers from these guys are available elsewhere. They're based in San Diego and are SUPER popular here in Cali.


janerd75 - 8-9-2015 at 08:50 AM

I didn't know...they're a...uhhhh, this might not be what you're talking about... http://www.worldmarket.com

Personally, instead of beer which tends to give me The Bloat, right now I'm a Leaving Las Vegas rotgut kinda guy.


punkerhardcore - 8-9-2015 at 05:38 PM

Yeah, that's the same World Market I was talking about. That place is cool... they have all kinds of wines and a good selection of craft beers. Plus, they have all sorts of neat food stuffs that I can't find anyplace else around here.


janerd75 - 8-9-2015 at 05:54 PM

Clearly I was so far in the Danger Zone last night that I thought I was being "clever" by posting their website link thinking they were a furniture store and upon further review, they actually sell a pretty cool selection of spirits n' such.

Who knew, amirite? Oh, that's right you did.


janerd75 - 8-23-2015 at 07:43 AM



Fuck you, Nic Pizzolatto. FUCK. YOU. Velcoro was a goddamned hero, you FUCK.

[Edited on 8-23-2015 by janerd75]


Chris Is Good517 - 8-30-2015 at 01:13 AM

Pumpkin beer: yay or nay?

Defend your answer.


Paddlefoot - 8-30-2015 at 02:01 AM

If it get's you pissed then I say yay. Of course that also qualifies things like huffing gas, vanilla extract, or straining some liquid shoe polish through a loaf of bread so I might not be the best person to talk to about things like this.


Cherokee Jack - 8-30-2015 at 03:03 AM

Would I personally choose it? Probably nay.

My abstract opinion on 'is it okay'? Yea. When it comes to beer, I'm fine with beers that are actually brewed to have a given flavor. I'm not in favor of additives to beer (that's for cocktails, not beer), but if it's actually brewed to have a pumpkin flavor? That's fine, and if you enjoy it, go for it. Not my personal taste, but diff'rent strokes and all that.


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 05:28 AM

Lookit all this activity. Ohmahgoonnes. Homebrew Punkin' mash FTW. There are so many What A World We Live In Cheap DIY Bathtub Crank n' Booze Amazon options that it don't madder whut fruit/veggie you choose. Sugar, yeast, a bit o' time and my inner white girl can't even. CJ, CIG, y Pad...whutchall need? Y'all want Punkin'? Shiiiiit, I gitcha Punkin'. Whut hole size? Oh, to drink. Sure, we can do that too.


Paddlefoot - 8-30-2015 at 05:44 AM

Be patient. There has been some improvement but not enough to risk it just yet. Soon, my pet, soon......


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 06:33 AM






CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 06:48 AM

GUESS WHO'S ALSO GETTING DRUNK TONIGHT? I'm not quite sure what I'm gonna be able to bring to the party as of yet, but you can bet your sweet asses I'll be fine with playing the Squeak to your guys' Coop and Remer.


CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 06:57 AM

I just scrolled up and holy shit, more people? Well well well. I suppose this'll be far different from Pad and Janerdy's weekly Xavier/Magneto chess match in the park?

Pumpkin beer? I'm with Jack, faux-flavor sucks. But I see nothing wrong with 'em being naturally flavored, if that's your thing. Buddy of mine a few years back was big into the homebrewing scene and would get all Martha Stewarty and grow pears and peaches directly from the branch into 750ml bottles for some pretty good batches. I dug those, but I'll take a bitter ass IPA or anything Guinness-like over "flavored" stuff any day.


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 07:11 AM



Oh my stars and garters...




punkerhardcore - 8-30-2015 at 07:45 AM

I'll say aye on the pumpkin beers.

I'm not even a huge pumpkin fan in general, but some pumpkin brews are pretty good. Went to BevMo last night, and they're already starting to pop up. I wish I could even remember some that I've tried out in previous years, but I usually try different stuff all the time, so it's hard to remember what I've had/what I liked.


CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 07:51 AM

When Doves Cry from Milhouse Van Houten on Vimeo.





So, besides pumpkin beers, who wants to talk about chicks and music? Because I've been listening to what might actually be a criminal amount of David Byrne lately, which ties into the chick thing because he made an exceptional album with St. Vincent (Annie Clark) and I think I am in love.





Or movies? I'm currently watching Call Me Lucky, the documentary on Barry Crimmins by Bobcat Goldthwait. It's fucking great so far. Real interesting story that I'm happy to finally see a doc about.



I've been on a bit of a Bobcat kick this month. I masochistically watched World's Greatest Dad again on what turned out to be the one year anniversary of Robin Williams death, finally watched God Bless America the other day. I just need to track down Hot To Trot and Shakes The Clown on VOD to complete the oeuvre.

Oh wait, I still need to see his bigfoot movie Willow Creek. Still gonna hold of on Let Sleeping Dogs Lie, as I'm still not ready to watch a woman simulate a blowjob on a dog.

Ahhh, the ARTS.


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 08:01 AM



Punker, I...I don't think you've dranken enough. I ain't never had no Punkin' Beer. W-w-will it hurt? I don't have a trust fund, a pair of Uggs, nor a vagoina, but I guess I can give it a go.



Stahp, Crunk. STAHP!





[Edited on 8-30-2015 by janerd75]


CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 08:02 AM

quote:
Originally posted by punkerhardcore
I'll say aye on the pumpkin beers.

I'm not even a huge pumpkin fan in general, but some pumpkin brews are pretty good. Went to BevMo last night, and they're already starting to pop up. I wish I could even remember some that I've tried out in previous years, but I usually try different stuff all the time, so it's hard to remember what I've had/what I liked.


I noticed that the other night while stopping in to load up for a script writing session with my co-writer. I guess my knee-jerk reaction is to be dismissive of them, since pumpkin spiced shit is EVERY these days at this time of year. I'm just not a huge fan of anything resembling sweetness when it comes to the flavor of my alcohol. Perhaps that might be on account of some residual brainwashing by a certain webmaster I've been following since my formative years, and his distaste for the fruiting of beers. I'm guessing "gourding" would fall into the same category. Long story even longer, I just don't think I could buy a six pack of pumpkin spiced beer unless I was wearing a pair of UGG boots like some basic ass bitch.

Although I will concede that one of my favorite beers, and one that I'm currently enjoying is Boulevard's Tank 7 which is grapefruit based. (cue the Vince McMahon gifs)

edited to add: Just thought I'd add that Jesus Christ this thread is hard to load with my board settings currently set to display 100 posts per page.

[Edited on 8/30/2015 by CM Crunk]


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 08:06 AM

I miss Vince. Ugg, I know right!


CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 08:15 AM



I kinda miss Vince too. Even when he was at his doo-rag wearing, ECW World Title having worst, I'd still rather have a McMahon that I actually enjoy hating on screen every week as opposed to the one that I just actually hate.

Also, that pic of Vince looks like he's doing his best GOB Bluth impression.


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 08:28 AM

I miss Crazy Vince. I miss the Merciless WWF Guatemalan Insanity Peppers of Quetzalacatenango.





I know, Vince. It's a brave new WWE. I get it. I don't like it, but I get it. But we'll always have ShKane...




CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 08:46 AM

Congratulations. You inspired me to change my avatar. Don't let it go to your head, and most importantly....


janerd75 - 8-30-2015 at 09:03 AM

I'm not sure if your avatar is saying "Whatchogonna do" or "Uno-yo-beso-wahCHOOOOOOoooo!!"



It's a videotape. IT'S. A. VIDEOTAPE, CORAL! I'm...so...old...



No, you don't quit your gay job you gay. Gay.


CM Crunk - 8-30-2015 at 10:02 AM



















(GIFS! Modern hieroglyphics. Fuck the haters. Also fuck the ones who pronounce "gif" with a soft "G".)

[Edited on 8/30/2015 by CM Crunk]


janerd75 - 9-13-2015 at 06:51 AM



Alternatively...



Ready to commit some macroaggressions, n-words. Macroaggressions. Did you see what I did there? Please someone see what I did there. Please. Please.


Paddlefoot - 9-13-2015 at 08:11 AM

Sorry. Hell isn't through with me yet. Back's better, stomach is still causing lots of problems. Maybe, someday, I hope.....


janerd75 - 9-13-2015 at 08:23 AM






Paddlefoot - 9-13-2015 at 09:04 AM


janerd75 - 9-13-2015 at 09:37 AM











Death. Rebirth. The Whole Fuckin' Show. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. Whatevs.


Paddlefoot - 9-13-2015 at 06:30 PM

Hopefully just death because I don't want to come back to this planet and have to do it all over again. Close eyes, followed by sweet, sweet oblivion........


janerd75 - 9-13-2015 at 06:49 PM

Just get it on tape and I'll do the same.


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 04:10 AM

It....it begins again (horrified & ominous brave AND stunning John Rhys-Davies voiceover)



[Edited on 1/1/2016 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 05:35 AM

AWWWWWWWWWWWWW SHIT! TIME TO HYPE THE NEW YEAR WITH SOME KICKASS, FUNKY FRESH UPLIFTING BEATS!!!! AIN'T NO PARTY LIKE A JANERD POSITIVITY PARTY, Y'ALLLLLLLS! LEMMIE HEAR YOU MAKE SOME NOIZE!!! 1-2-3 GET LOOSE NOW...



UHHHH, I, HUH, let's see now, that can't be right, YO, FOUND IT! HERE WE GO NOW, HERE WE GO NOW, 1-2-3 GET LOOSE NOW...



Waaaaait a sec...


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 05:52 AM

Here's the 90's version from a differently blessed (with the mass depression only the post-Reagan world was capable of creating) generation.



Cool, very cool, but nothing like the way Skeletor, err, Karen sang "sad guitar".


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 05:59 AM

Best NYE song ever.




janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 06:05 AM

Is it New Years at the Alberta truck stop yet? Shits been goin' down in 2016 like you wouldn't believe! Trump/Cruz did it! They did it! They opened the portal!!! Lucifer is finally FREE!!! Moar Carpenterz!!!!




Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 06:13 AM

Alberta? Oh, yeah, that fuckin' place. 2015 was just all the water racing away from the shoreline. 2016 is it all coming back in a 3000 foot high rushing wave Lucifer's Hammer style.



[Edited on 1/1/2016 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 06:32 AM

Well, the long answer, Merle, is yes. As is the short one. But fortunately for me, my response to most things these days is thus:



More like Facial Mountain Breakdown, 'nowhutI'msayin' Bocephus?



Time to laugh you gormless Canadienne tapette!!!


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 06:49 AM

^^^Setup^^^

Punchline:



New trailer. What's Maggie Screaming at? Looks like she's still stuck up on that platform, but Glenn's been filmed with De Jesus, and noboddy fucks wit De Jesus, man. So I don't think that's the moment, do you know what I am saying? I still think it's going to be a swerve-a-rooni that's reserved for Morgan. Know why? The number of letters in the name 'Morgan' is the exact same as the last name of the guy playing Negan. Even though it's spelled differently and one guy's not even American. But still, it's gonna be Morgan. He's the black guy with the big stick. I know, I know, total stereotype. We have so much further to go. #Thanks Osama. Discuss.


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 06:55 AM

Morgan? We can't have two Morgans, gawdammit! - Vincent Kennedy Alzheimer McMahon

Bocephus? That inbred sack of crap? Here's his best friend. Now if this guy were to run for POTUS, as opposed to a crooked NYC realtor or some ex-Calgarian who looks like someone stretched an anus to it's maximum extent over a baboon skull, I could get behind it.






[Edited on 1/1/2016 by Paddlefoot]


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 07:02 AM

Fuck it.


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 07:19 AM

Kid Rock seens ligke uh preddy cool dube. I hote Pamb Anbersomb diddin't gib himb the Hebbuhdyedits, See*.











*Do they give you a choice of rooms in hell?


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 07:27 AM

Hell stays open all life long.

Canada, eh? Well, you you you you!


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 07:39 AM

This was playing in the background when janerd and I broke up in the vestibule of some anonymous and dying florida shopping mall.....





central Canadian version ftw!



[Edited on 1/1/2016 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 07:55 AM

That was before my transition into Transjanerd! You loved me then as you love me now. Swoon!





SWOOOOOOOON, EH?



BUT WHERE ARE THE SAUSAGES, MON FRERE! YOU PROMISED ME YOUR SAUSAGE, JUSTIN!!!!!




Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 08:03 AM

Yeah but my country reeks of trees.


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 08:19 AM

Trees? TREES? Aww, fuck that noise.



Trees are for fags. No wonder Buddy Cole lives up there.



But I betcha I know what juden don't have...



And now's when everything goes south, Ladies and Gennimans. A visit from the men in the black suburbans in 3-2-1...


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 08:22 AM

OK, that last one made me laugh, A.Wyatt Mann-style. On the count of three everybody dindu.


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 08:36 AM

Drinks are starting to hit. Just stewing in hatecrime broth. Feelin' allll Reich, uh huh.





Doan wurry, nobody. Jewsrael's gonna sabe the planets by doin' this sweet manuber on the towlies soon...



Swear to Real God (the 'Murican one, duh) if the Hymens ever Rothstein 'The Last Starfighter' into a remake I will push L.A. out into the Specific by myself. Muhfuggers.

Hangon, hangon Pazzafut, lemmi se whutdother ethnig group imma make funnof nex. Uh oh, loogs like we gotta winnger....*




*The comments expressed here do not reflect the OOpinions of anyone here on this forum and are used soley for "comedic" purposes. However, if one were to assign blame, it would be prudent to focus exclusively on the posts of Pad L. Foot, Inc. and his shameful agenda of hate and bigotry and doing queer shit.


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 08:53 AM

Chiggers! Shazam! Great great gramps who rode with Bedford Forrest was telling the truth all along!



Here comes Israel!



The Germans knew. Goddamn right they knew.







[Edited on 1/1/2016 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 09:16 AM

This...this might get Teh Rick y Teh Authoritahs involved. Shucks!





Do ya kennit, Enwards?!?!



Why yes, this looks exactly like Idris Elba. Uncanny, really.



But last, the whores!!!!


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 09:46 AM

LAST CALLLLLL!!!!






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 10:03 AM

I am disappoint in myself tonight. The inebriation is there but the creativity isn't. Fuck me, fuck me like one of your French girls.

When in doubt retreat in to the past


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 10:23 AM

Nah, Behbeh Dahl, doan tawk lyke dat...







Though the sun be comin' up heyah...get in sum licks on tha sticks befo' Jannit finna gotah bed and touch his ...Bible.


janerd75 - 1-1-2016 at 10:46 AM






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2016 at 10:55 AM

florida erwache


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 04:35 AM

For one night only this very special episode of RAW is brought to you by.....the town drunk.




janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 04:44 AM

Beybeh dawwwwwwwwwwl. Woo.






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 04:52 AM

Official song for 2017, aka The Year We Stopped Pretending Otherwise.


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 04:55 AM







You're on the wrong street, m8!


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 05:03 AM

They're good songs, 'nerd.




janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 05:14 AM










Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 05:19 AM

Hmmm. Bang heads or weep hopelessly?




janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 05:33 AM

Just a warning from someone that can apparently time travel, 2017 is already a pretty fucked up place. Fuck it.








Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 05:37 AM

quote:
Originally posted by janerd75
Just a warning from someone that can apparently time travel, 2017 is already a pretty fucked up place. Fuck it.


Yeah, ISIS or whoever it was started it off with a real treat in Istanbul. And the rusty wire that holds the cork that keeps the anger in, gives way and suddenly it's day again.......


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 05:43 AM


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 05:49 AM

Aww shucks, I was talking aboot the bad shrimp I ate currently tearing it's way toot sweet oot my brown bowl baster. Did...did the Mussulmen get up to some shenanigans ackbar agayn? Lol, j/k, of course they did.






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 06:05 AM

Different bit of Canuckistan,


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 06:14 AM

Aww shit, K. emm effin' D!








Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 06:19 AM

Is love such an old-fashioned word?


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 06:34 AM

Pretty much the Saying Goodbye thread tonight. Sorry. It's been a hard couple of days.


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 06:40 AM

Probably the single finest song I've ever heard in my entire life. It's the long version, and curse forever the commercial radio idiots who shortened it for mass consumption.



[Edited on 1/1/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 07:12 AM

Say goodbye, you say?





Second finest, holmes.



And now, THE WHORES!!!






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 07:16 AM







[Edited on 1/1/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 07:34 AM

You Snow Mexicans are fuggin' alright, eh?










Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 07:36 AM

They're fine people even though they can't fight zombies worth a fuck. Back to Canada though for a moment........


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 07:50 AM

Oh man, total downer brah. I'm goin' down like the Edmund Fitzgerald.




Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 07:54 AM

So old and broken


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 08:11 AM

Neat, the ketamine is kicking in. Lol, j/k, it's just bleach. I can't afford Special K.

And now presenting...



Wait for it, waaaiiiit foooooorrrrrrr iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit...............................








Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 08:19 AM


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 08:39 AM



Sometimes you just gotta grab life by the pussy, guy.










janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 09:13 AM

JEZTHABEYULL!!!!



Golden Spoon. Lol, I get it.






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 09:20 AM

Different wavelengths tonight. Take two of these and call the emergency room in the morning.


Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 09:33 AM

When Janny comes down and I come up this will be the song that's playing when the stars are finally right.




janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 09:33 AM

These guys were on different wavelengths and look what happened.





John Prine lives in the little beach Burg where my parents just sold their condo. I met him in the grocery store once. He was very nice. That was an uplifting story.


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 09:46 AM

Uh oh. Transjanerd powers-------->ACTIVATE.





Much like Blazing Saddles, there's no fucking way a 'tard circus like this gets released in this day and age. Einhorn must be one a' them Replicants that come with the attachment package. I said, the attachment pack...ah, you get the idea.


janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 10:05 AM

Time to throttle back and mellow oot...






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 10:28 AM

Try being civilized for a change, American



janerd75 - 1-1-2017 at 10:51 AM



Time to put the ornaments away...






Paddlefoot - 1-1-2017 at 11:08 AM

Different wavelengths tonight. Too much spindrift. All that other shit. Oh well, try again later.



[Edited on 1/1/2017 by Paddlefoot]


Paddlefoot - 4-1-2017 at 07:39 AM

Bump. There's probably going to be a pre-Mania pisser here Saturday night. The usual suspects will be in attendance but all are welcome. Get 'faced and sing along to Bobby Roode's Glorious? Hey, why the hell not? We'd do it if we were there live. And if this year's Mania is going to be at least 75% uninspired suckage then why not face it with a hangover? As Duthtay sayd in one of Janny's videos above, it's going to be SHAYMEFULL!



[Edited on 4/1/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 4-1-2017 at 08:16 AM

Mah boddeh, asth thhey they daddeh, euthz redday!










Paddlefoot - 4-1-2017 at 08:34 AM

quote:
Originally posted by janerd75]




Always bothers me how much some of these Tool videos resemble most of my early family life at home before the finally got divorced.


Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 03:14 AM

Oh, yeah......



This dropped the other day to massive acclaim:



It took me a while to remember fully but that song they're using (which if you read the lyrics fit in perfectly with both the overall situation and in particular the three remaining rulers going into GOT S7) I had on a mixtape back in 91 or 92 that pretty much got listened to over and over again until it broke.



in love
in fear
in hate
in tears

Hi Janny!

[Edited on 4/2/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 04:10 AM

Speaking of James, you do seem fascinated by the criminal element...



Time for some compare and contrast! Which one is real and which one's the skit?






Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 04:28 AM

1) I know! Ask Paige, err, A Porn Star

2) I can't find it but there's a gif out there of a guy coming out of a hole cut in pond ice and he's fully dressed in hockey gear. Find it pls because that's how Canadians are born.

3) Also,


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 04:35 AM






Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 04:37 AM

Melkor bless thee.



[Edited on 4/2/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 04:54 AM






Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 05:09 AM

A Paige gif would work perfectly about now, just to keep Coe pissed off mind you.

I haven't visited those sites since election night. I imagind the visceral glee of those good ol' boys was like,



I went to the borders of Hell just to see what was in there and, y'know, had to walk in the other direction. I mean, I like the jokes and all but I ain't about any of that. Sorry.


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 05:19 AM

Never no mind any of that. My take is that I gazed into the abyss, it gazed back into me, noticed I began to cackle like a madman, and then promptly fucked back off into the nothing to leave me be. Go long eternal darkness!!!







Wait, which gif is that reaction for, Cap'n Jack? WHICH GIF?!?!


Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 05:32 AM

I mean, I get the frustration. We have it up here too in PerfectionLand, despite all our delightful self-satisfying propaganda that we feed ourselves. Both the grand-dads served in WW2 though. The one died way back when in like 1973 or something. I figured he was just a mean old man because he was pissed off all the time. Didn't find out until last year that when he was in the RAF as a ground crew chief that he had third-degree burns on his entire back from when a Luftwaffe strafing run on his base blew up a fuel truck right next to him and his guys back in 1941. Even if he was a mean old man to me there's still only one side to take. I understand but I can not and will not join that other side, no matter how pissed off I get.





[Edited on 4/2/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 05:44 AM

There are no sides anymore. Only one thing left to do...



Okay, two things...






Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 05:50 AM

Do the Enzo dance for me.










[Edited on 4/2/2017 by Paddlefoot]


Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 06:15 AM

Mike Curb Congregation before,



And after,




janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 06:35 AM

JONESY!!! MY MOST FAVORITE TOWN OF ALL NEXT TO #TOWN!!!1!!!1!1!!!
















janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 07:14 AM



They can feel it too!



Sumbuddy betta call yo mama! Speaking of calling people, BCS April 10TH! Get ready to re-bring the Fring! As they say in Canada, w00t!


Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 07:26 AM

Still here. Just out of insane fuel for the moment.




janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 07:36 AM

THEN IT'S TIME TO BRING IN SOME 2017 HA-HA NO-NO'S AND GET HYPE!!!









And the GOLLY! award for 90's brazenness goes to...



I...I guess everyone got paid though so it's okay?




janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 07:53 AM

GET HYPE, STAY HYPE!!!!






Heatherette M.A.C Cosmetics Directed By David LaChapelle from Daniel J Alexandre on Vimeo.




Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 07:55 AM

Good lord, that's some rebel fire. Golly!

Standard heroin girl, I'm gay, yada yada yada, good song though.


Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 08:11 AM

Just don't tell me there's a protein-centric Enzo vid out there. Can't take much more.


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 08:24 AM







GET HYPE, STAY HY


Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 08:31 AM

Shit like that is why I keep cheering for the asteroid. Bury me in plastic wrap to keep this incessant tornado of cum off of me.


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 08:43 AM






Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 09:06 AM


janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 09:14 AM








janerd75 - 4-2-2017 at 09:30 AM










Paddlefoot - 4-2-2017 at 09:33 AM

Help me! I don't know what to do!


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 06:00 AM


Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 06:00 AM

One cookie down.


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 06:07 AM






Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 06:13 AM

Suddenly the black lotus kicks in.



Changed the thread title to something proper, and most likely to piss off some tranny-loving FREAK!

[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 06:24 AM

With all this re-imaginary shit + Deadpool/Logan awesomeness, how in tć feck ain't they got a King Conan off the ground yet?!?! I DON'T WANT NO ASS KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL GODIT!!!

Also, PEE-FEETS!!!!!





We can rebuild you! Bigger, better, faster!!! Now, with 200% more Flakka!!!!!!!



Did someone say secret tranny?!?!?!?! THIS IS THE GREATEST THREAD EVAR!!!!!!


Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 06:30 AM

Beam Matte back in time to Studio 54 because it was really just a continuation of the non-stop tranny surprise going on with Warhol.

Heavy disco bass night! Fellating optional! wOOt!







[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 06:47 AM

Did someone say alterna-disco-bass-fellatio?!?!








Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 06:52 AM

Original Euro disco here. Get in the car Janny, we're visiting Belgium!




janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 07:16 AM








Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 07:26 AM

And then there's that episode of Kurt & Courtney we'll never forget! POTY candidate here!

quote:
Originally posted by Paddlefoot
I thought that movie used diversity to promote white genocide.


http://www.oowrestling.com/OOForums/viewthread.php?tid=31712&page=2

ROAR, Queen! YASS!



[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]

[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 07:41 AM



*ahem* Do grow up, won't you?



While I'm 72% sure that blisteringly white trash demigod Courtney Love had her old man whacked and/or peripherally knew of said whacking pre-aforechancedly, well, shit dude, that ain't right either.


Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 08:02 AM

I dunno. She's definitely mental and a terrible mom but she doesn't seem actively evil. She had a really bad childhood which turned her into a mega-bitch but she doesn't come across as murderous.

Back to the Sammy gif. You AND I are both going to hell. Together!



Hey, speaking of Matte



[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 08:13 AM

Will. You. Let. Me. Conspirisize. In. Peace?!?!



Lol, j/k mah Canadienne-word. You know that when you ride with me, you're sure to get toasted.









[Edited on 6-18-2017 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 08:27 AM

Well, that second cookie just kicked in.



Christ, I gotta talk them into selling them up at the high school. We'd make a fucking fortune.



And here's a thirty-year old Mitch McConnell with The Good News!



Oh, my, Janny hold my hand.





[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]

[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 08:39 AM





Fudge it! Fudge it all to heck!









[Edited on 6-18-2017 by janerd75]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 08:46 AM

What the everlasting shit, The Internet, don't not post my shit.


Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 08:47 AM

I'd mail you about eight of these if I didn't want to do 35 in a Supermax for trafficking drugs across the American border.

Waves waving, man!



Listen to that bass. FAAAAAAACCCCK!



[Edited on 6/18/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-18-2017 at 09:01 AM









[Edited on 6-18-2017 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 6-18-2017 at 09:09 AM

I din nat ged da bear! Because I'm CANADIAN, damn you!




janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 05:40 AM

Well, life's a bitch n' then you marry one. Alls you know now is you're goin' into the bar tonight to get just fuckin' interplanetary. Fuckin' Wayne, eh?

Time. To get. Fuckin' interplanetary.






Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 06:19 AM

One brownie down.





[Edited on 6/24/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 06:26 AM

Are one or both of those guys dead? Like I thought you just were?




Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 06:33 AM

Everybody's dead. They just don't know it yet. Kinda looking forward to it myself, after the last three years, as long as the process isn't too smelly, poopy, or barfy.


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 06:44 AM

Wouldn't be a Canadian music video withoot Don Cherry, eh?








Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 07:01 AM

Still here. In stasis mode momentarily. Please resume tugging your nut sacks, ya titfuckers.


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 07:08 AM




Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 07:25 AM

Back now. Heard noises outside. Went to take a look and the cops had some jabroni pushed up against a car a few houses down. Lot of yellin', and such. There was such a din I really didn't know what to du, if ya's get my meaning there, squirrely Dan. ......and their voices rang with that aryan twang...



[Edited on 6/24/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 07:40 AM

No lie, but a few nights ago my neighbors right next door got their car rummaged through. I say rummaged through and not broken into because the dumbasses left their car unlocked overnight, which is a no-no in my neighborhood especially now that school is out and break-ins noticeably increase. Got 'em comin' in and goin' out on both mine and my across the street neighbors cams. They didn't get much but they did du us all a scare. Good times.



Meh, I ain't scurred. Blazy o' glory would be a hoot at this point. I guess I...


Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 07:47 AM

Might as well get it over with, considering I brought it up in the Nu-trek bashing thread.



Whoa, that was a major wave flowing through. Better consult this guy for advice:



Thanks for the weapon, err, gif BTW.

[Edited on 6/24/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 08:03 AM




Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 08:10 AM

This is the goalie I'd like to pull to.




janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 08:24 AM





Dirty milkers oughta gentle y'down some.


Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 08:37 AM

Muppets. They creep me out, man.



Yes. It's German.


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 08:45 AM

Might be roundin' the horn towards dreamland soon.






Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 08:53 AM

5AM Florida time. My god, the night shift bath-salt zombies will be replaced by the day shift meth zombies in an hour. Speaking of old zombies, here's one that might be the real father of our prime minister.



[Edited on 6/24/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 6-24-2017 at 09:07 AM

It ends as it began...







Sleep peaceful, old wanderer.





[Edited on 6-24-2017 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 6-24-2017 at 09:12 AM

One was awesome enough. What could possibly go wrong with two?




Paddlefoot - 9-16-2017 at 10:10 PM

Bump-a-doo humperdoo! Probably having a session tonight if anyone's interested. wOOt!


janerd75 - 9-16-2017 at 11:43 PM

Humperdoo checkin' in. I hope. Internet and cable's been dodgy since The Weather Unpleasantness. Hope for the best and pray for the worst I suppose. Wait...no yeah yeah no I'm pretty sure that's how the quote goes.


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 12:30 AM

If he pisses on you it means he likes you.


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 04:48 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Paddlefoot
If he pisses on you it means he likes you.




Man, she really likes those drapes. I wonder if they match the carpet. Well, I guess they do now.

Also: Dear Comcast,


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 05:01 AM

Hey, it's Janny!



I imagine the travel dialogue during the Escape FROM Florida! goes a little bit like this.



Of course I imagine every day in Florida (and most of the US in general) is pretty much like this, everywhere and all the time.

[Edited on 9/17/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 05:27 AM



^This image yonder is an actual representation of what it was like down here for 5 days without air conditioning. Fuck the internet, tv, refrigeration, being able to see Walkers in the dark. That shit was an absolute cakewalk compared to sitting in 90+ degree heat and humidity with two old people that are particularly susceptible to heat related trauma. And I was certainly at the limits of my pain tolerance due to my Heat Madness.

Like Bruce Willis' only weakness in 'Unbreakable' being water, mine is most certainly heat. In the cold I can generally walk around like one of those dickheads that wears a coat with shorts in 20 degree weather. But somewhere along the way around ten years ago (The Constuction and Attic Work Years) I lost my fucking tolerance for hot goddamn weather. SO ANGRY!!!!

Reverse Spoiler Alert! Don't be tellin' me nothin' no more aboot Preacher. Not one goddamned hour ago I had aboot 20 minutes to go on the season finale before the Roku finally gave up the ghost for smooth streaming. Makes me wanna go all Saint-y on Comcast. Because we just had a major storm. And things are mostly back to normal. But I can't watch my teevee show. Because I'm a spoiled first-world bitch.



I'm assuming The Word didn't work because the Saint's back in hell with part of Jessie's soul? And, uh, thanks Hitler, I guess? Just. Twenty. Moar. Minutes.


Matte - 9-17-2017 at 05:27 AM

Two things:


1)

quote:
Originally posted by janerd75


Why am I turned on by this?

2) Would it be terribly inconvenient for you two (and anyone else who frequents this thread) if the Drunk Thread was moved to Parts Unknown? I wanted to run it by you guys before moving it so you don't think it was just deleted or something. You could add a link to your signature if you'd like.


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 05:46 AM

Meh. Go for it.


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 05:47 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Matte
Two things:


1)
quote:
Originally posted by janerd75


Why am I turned on by this?

2) Would it be terribly inconvenient for you two (and anyone else who frequents this thread) if the Drunk Thread was moved to Parts Unknown? I wanted to run it by you guys before moving it so you don't think it was just deleted or something. You could add a link to your signature if you'd like.












[Edited on 9-17-2017 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 06:13 AM

Golly, those cookies sure have a punch.


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 06:22 AM


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 06:29 AM

Hey, Roy, don't be a drag be a queen. Put your paws up, furry!



[Edited on 9/17/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 06:44 AM


Heatherette M.A.C Cosmetics Directed By David LaChapelle from Daniel J Alexandre on Vimeo.









So, it's gonna be one of those kinda nights.


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 06:48 AM

Pissibility impissibility mother


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 07:10 AM

PISS PARTY!!!!!











[Edited on 9-17-2017 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 07:31 AM







[Edited on 9/17/2017 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 07:57 AM

PISS. EVERYWHERE.







The Stylin', profilin', limousine riding, jet flying, kiss-stealing, wheelin' n' dealin' son of a gun loves his girl every day of the month. Woo.

I wonder if Ric's crank still works? That'd be the most tragic aspect of all this if the thing he treasures most in this life gave out on him now. Hopefully whatever they're pumping him full of to keep him going has a side effect of giving him at least a semi-chub so he can slither his Lil' Crypt Keeper up in whichever addled, siliconized dimwit decided it would be a good idea to be wife number whatever the fuck it's up to now. WOO.

[Edited on 9-17-2017 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 08:14 AM

Sorry. Many waves are occurring now. Gosh!




janerd75 - 9-17-2017 at 08:22 AM











https://imgur.com/account/favorites/dAsy7

Peace amongst all y'all niggas. I'm out!


Paddlefoot - 9-17-2017 at 08:26 AM

Sorry. It was easier when drunk instead of with other, y'know, substances.


Paddlefoot - 1-4-2019 at 03:50 AM

Removing the dust-covered tarp now, just to see if it's fit to go for a drive tomorrow night. Shiny! So smooth and shiny!




BTW probably getting drunk and stoned tomorrow night. Join in one and all! wOOt!


janerd75 - 1-5-2019 at 05:02 AM

These are My People™.

Action starts aboat 6:40 in dere, Bud.

https://fox6now.com/2019/01/04/wwes-braun-strowman-takes-polar-plunge-raises-money-for-boys-and-girls-club/


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 05:07 AM

And so it begins, Janny……….






Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 05:59 AM

Janny?




[Edited on 1/6/2019 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 06:59 AM

what





[Edited on 1-6-2019 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 07:28 AM

Hey! It's my buddy!


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 07:31 AM

We're wrestling fans, damn you!




janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 07:33 AM





Fuggin' old people, man I tell you hwat.


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 07:42 AM

Janny. I'm old and isane.


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 07:49 AM

You gotta spin it to win it, eh!




Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 07:57 AM

Janny. You're being silly, Janny.


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 08:09 AM

I don't think so dere, Guy. I'm always serious. Seriously icOOnic lolololol...



WHIRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLSTAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 08:21 AM

Is that the one with the infection draining? Gah!

Quit being silly , Janny


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 08:38 AM

You mean when his DONGer got stuffed up with kidney stones? Geez o' Pete I can't wait for the Deadwood movie!


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 08:43 AM



Pretty pissed right now, Janny


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 08:51 AM

Pissed, eh?! I've got just the guys for that kinda nonsense!




Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 09:07 AM



You're stily being silly, Janny.


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 09:13 AM

Just clobbered the secong huge brownie, Janny. Fifteen pak and two great huge clubberin' brownies, Janny. This is Canada.


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 09:15 AM



Peace from the East!





[Edited on 1-6-2019 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 09:22 AM

Re; last gif - yeah! pretty much!




[Edited on 1/6/2019 by Paddlefoot]


janerd75 - 1-6-2019 at 09:30 AM

Smoke grass and eat ass.



Sleep peaceful, Old Wanderer!



[Edited on 1-6-2019 by janerd75]


Paddlefoot - 1-6-2019 at 09:42 AM

I need help, Janny….


Big G - 1-29-2019 at 08:37 AM

There was a time when Janny had the best av's on here by a country mile.

Now, lucky to be top 5.

Makes me long for 2017. When my stash of Oxycodone was marge largesse.


Big G - 1-29-2019 at 12:01 PM

What, no one gets rat arsed falling down drunk on a Tuesday here anymore? MediOOcre.

You've changed OO


Big G - 1-29-2019 at 12:27 PM













[Edited on 1-29-2019 by Big G]


Paddlefoot - 1-29-2019 at 06:01 PM

Day drinking? Now that I can respect.


Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 07:23 AM

CANADIENNE!


Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 07:31 AM

Fuckin' boomers! Suck my fuckin' dick!


janerd75 - 3-16-2019 at 07:32 AM

HAPPY STEVE'S DAY!




Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 07:46 AM

why'd they get rid of Twinkies, Janny? Crime against America, against humanity!


Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 07:52 AM

Bring back those catamites and as many FLA twinks you can find, Janny! Tonight we're going techno! CANADIENNE!


Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 08:00 AM

Whoever kept this one off of Appetite For Destruction back in the day should be flayed alive.


janerd75 - 3-16-2019 at 08:08 AM

Uhhhhh....



Also, Win Butler 'minds me of Edge "Adam" Copeland. Régine 'minds me of the fact I need to move closer to Cah-nah-DAH, eh?



Also2 I legit have no idea how GnR, at least the principles involved like Axl n' Slash, are alive and functioning to this very day. Leaves me hope that a full-fledged Van Hagar line-up with Mike and Sammy with Eddie and Alex are still possible. Maybe there's a way I can figger out to make it happen...


janerd75 - 3-16-2019 at 08:15 AM

Lol, Twinkies...




Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 08:48 AM

sorry, passed out there for a bit. oi! powerful stuff!


janerd75 - 3-16-2019 at 08:49 AM




Paddlefoot - 3-16-2019 at 08:55 AM

…drunk as fuck
drunk as fuck
drunk as fuck....



Well, stoned as fuck anyway. Only had four tallboys with the other portion. Short duration buzz but powerful as hell. Kind of like Hornswoggle cosplaying as a Strong Black Woman...


janerd75 - 3-16-2019 at 09:10 AM

Steady your interwebhand Feet of Paddles! For the Hour of Inappropriateness is uponst us!!!








Paddlefoot - 3-18-2019 at 10:28 PM

It was good for me. Was it good for you, Janny?

Next time I'm cosplaying as a strong tall blonde robot woman!


janerd75 - 3-18-2019 at 10:44 PM

A good time had by all and nary an n-bomb was dropped! Might need to McMurray it up a tad more for some added Canadienne spice next time though. How in the FUDGE can you sweet and polite Snow Mexicans get away with shit Always Sunny and South Park can't or won't even do?


Paddlefoot - 3-18-2019 at 10:49 PM

Simple. We don't ever listen to anyone who has a Bible anywhere near them when they start babbling about what's allowable. And if they do speak out too loudly we usually just go "that's very cute, dear, but that's quite enough of that for now". It's quite liberating to keep them in their proper place, far away from the sharp knives and BBQ lighters.


janerd75 - 3-18-2019 at 10:55 PM

ACCURATE.


Count Zero - 3-19-2019 at 12:56 AM

Bubbles is my personal lord and savior.

That time he saw the Samsquantch was epic.


Paddlefoot - 3-19-2019 at 01:08 AM

Ahh, the infamous samsquantch episode!

pic.twitter.com/fyqvu4TYBY

— Trailer Park Boys Screencaps (@TPBoysScreen) March 15, 2019


Big G - 3-29-2019 at 08:25 AM



Posted for the '70's hotties in the crowd.

Gra'mas now prolly - the ones that survived the '70's anyway. Rock on ladies!

[Edited on 3-29-2019 by Big G]