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Kane Hears Dead People
To
hear Kane tell it, the vegetated corpse of his brother, The Undertaker,
finally stirred this past week. And Kane was right there (presumably in
the produce aisle of his local grocer, where all vegetables are stored)
to hear Taker utter precisely two words before he returned to his
dormant state. Those two words: "Rey Mysterio." If you believe Kane,
that means Taker just named the man responsible for his vegetative
state. And (for now, anyway) Kane believes Kane's story, so that
spelled bad news for poor Rey Rey on this night. He tried to have a
match against Jack Swagger, and instead, he ended up getting tossed
into the Gulf of Mexico when Kane decided to attack when the brawl
spilled outside the arena. Get the full report in PyroFalkon'sSmackDown Recap.
As of MLB All Star Break 2010
BEST
BRAND: Cincinnati Reds RAW: ???
-/- SD!: ??? ECW:
??? -/- TNA: ??? Out of
5.0 possible points.
BEST
PERFORMER(S): Joey Votto
BEST
MATCH:
Reds vs. St. Louis Cardinals (NL Central Grudge Match)
BEST
INTERVIEW/ANGLE:
Rookie Phenom Mike Leake skips the minors entirely, dominates MLB, all
while Media Darling Stephen Strasberg toils in Triple-A for the first 3
months; suck on that, Bonus Boy!
Want
to help determine this week's winners? Effective this Summer, the
Onslaught Honors are now dicussed and voted upon in the OO FORUMS. Join
now and cast your weekly ballots in this battle of the brands!
2009
WWE PPV RECAP GUIDE
Just in case the 2010
PPV Reference Guide available in the main middle column isn't
comprehensive enough for you, here's a simple round-up of all of LAST
year's PPV recaps for you edification:
This site was originally designed on a PC using
Microsoft products, but is now being updated using a Mac and strange
new software. It should still look nice (so long as you have a
relatively recent browser and a screen resultion of 800x600 or higher),
but I know we're starting to run into strange anomolies with font
size/attributes due to stupid MacWare. So if anything looks weird or
you have any trouble
browsing, please let me
know!
RAW SATIRE: RAW is Wormholes Time
and space were once again warped over in our Alternate RAWniverse. For
starters, Chris Jericho seemed to be under the impression that it was
2004 all over agayn and busted out some old school "Y2J" chops. But
then again, maybe it wasn't the past on Monday; maybe it was THE
FUTURE~! One week into the future, to be precise....
RAW RECAP: The Super Best Friends? John
Cena's assembled a team to face Nexus at SummerSlam, but before they
can perform any heroics, they need to simply get along. Jericho wants
to be Team Captain; Edge wants to kick Khali off the team; Truth and
Morrison now randomly hate each other. Oh dear dear, what is AquaMan
Cena to do? Check the recap to find out.
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Kane Pleads Guilty... No,
not guilty to vegetating his own brother (at least, not yet)... but
guilty to doing whatever it took to become a world champion. The fans
were willing to cheer his actions (he took advantage of a beaten Rey
Mysterio to win the title) at first, but became suspicious of Kane's
real agenda and mental stability by night's end. Get the details.
RAW SATIRE: Fella-ship of the Ring? Sheamus
may be Our WWE Champion, but nobody takes him seriously, yet. So he's
thinking of joining Nexus, just for the exposure/credibility. Problem
is: Nexus isn't interested. Over in our Alternate RAWniverse, Sheamus
must undertake a mythic quest to earn their respect. No, not to Mount
Doom; but it will involve World of Warcraft.
RAW
RECAP: Bret's Back... for Now... The
night started with a stellar 3-way #1 Contender Match featuring Edge
and Jericho, and won by Orton... and then it ended with a bit of a
surprise: John Cena assembled a 7 man team face Nexus at SummerSlam,
and it included the returning Bret "the Hitman" Hart. Read up.
PPV
RECAP: WWE Money in the Bank 2010 There's
a new world champ, and it's not John Cena. Or even Jack Swagger. It's
Kane, who won Money in the Bank and cashed it in a mere hour later
against a victorious but already wounded Rey Mysterio. That was the
night's biggest surprise, but two excellent ladder matches
were
the biggest reasons to get really excited on this night, as you'll see
if you check out Rick Scaia's full report.
SMACKDOWN
RECAP: Sacrificial Dad Jack
Swagger just wanted to prove he was innocent of vegetating the
ProduceTaker... so he had his dad show up with a slide show of an
alibi. Kane was having none of it, and tried to take out his
frustrations on the Swaggers; Jack bailed, however, and left his dad to
take the beating.
RAW
SATIRE: Down Goes Cena~! OMG,
Cena got pinned, cleanly, to lose the main event on RAW! Crazy; it
could only happen in our Alternate RAWniverse, right? Either way, don't
despair, True Believers, for as soon as Cena got done losing, he just
stood up and started fighting back as if nothing had happened. John
Cena? SELL?!? Don't be crazy...
RAW
RECAP: Bunches and Couples "Mrs.
Brady" Florence Henderson was the Guest Host of RAW this week, and
oversaw a special "Santino Bunch" vs. "Regal Bunch" tag match... but
the more notable sitcom homagery came when Sheamus decided to be pals
with John Cena, afterall, and the two formed an Odd Couple to fend off
The Nexus. Get the full report.
OOTRR:
WWE Vengeance 2004 Re-Revued Just
as some fans are latching onto the idea that Eugene would be a fun
choice as WWE's Anonymous GM, we take you back to 6 years ago, when
wrestling's "Idiot Savant" stole the show on PPV, as part of a
show-spanning storyline and then by getting involved in the HHH/Benoit
main event. Adam Gutschmidt takes you back in time...
SMACKDOWN
RECAP: It Ain't Easy Bein' Drew Drew
McIntyre is once again back in the good graces of US Immigration
authorities, but NOT in the good graces of SD GM Teddy Long. It was a
trying night on SD for Drew, but after initial humiliation, he redeemed
himself with a big win over Kofi Kingston. Get the full report...
RAW
SATIRE: Alien Visitations Only
in our Alternate RAWniverse could WWE's existing problems with regards
to Wade Barrett's immigration status be compounded by EVEN MORE ALIENS.
In this case, we're talking about Santino and Kozlov reviving the ALF
sitcom (presumably with Khali as the cat-eating freak?). Matt Hocking
will spin the yarn and make sense of it all.
RAW
RECAP: Red Herrings Everywhere! WAny
idiot in WWE's current target demo of 11-year-olds could latch onto the
significance of RAW's Anonymous GM using Steve Austin's catchphrases.
But what about the not so subtle hints of The Rock? Just an accident on
the part of the lazy Writer Monkeys? The People's Herring? Or something
more? Read up, and you decide!
SMACKDOWN
RECAP: Cody's Main Event Dash With
a dearth of warm bodies at WWE's disposal, Cody Rhodes has found
himself wrestling at the main event level on SD... and it only took one
week after a pretty floptastic "reinvention" as "Dashing" Cody Rhodes.
Oy. Find out how Cody got fast-tracked (and get the info on some very
interesting SES developments) in Pyro's latest recap.
2010
PPV
REFERENCE GUIDE PPV
RECAP: WWE Fatal Fourway 2010 Oh
sure, Sheamus beat John Cena (with help from NXT) and Rey pinned
Swagger, and both are new champs. But let's not kid ourselves: on a
fairly lackluster show, Chris Jericho and Evan Bourne were the two guys
who really stole the show. Rick Scaia has full results/analysis for you.
PPV
RECAP: WWE Over the Limit 2010 Other
than CM Punk getting shaved bald, this PPV didn't have a lot going for
it, wrestling-wise. But schadenfreude- wise, it was a grand slam, as
Randy Orton (our oft-beaten dead horse of a mantard) severely injured
his OWN shoulder while POSING, necessitating an early end to his match.
Get The Rick's full report.
PPV
RECAP: WWE Extreme Rules 2010 It
was a night of guys holding on to what they had. Some not so surprising
(like CM Punk keeping his hair, and John Cena keeping his WWE Title),
but at least one other that was kind of shocking: Jack Swagger cleanly
pinned Randy Orton to retain the World Title. Rick Scaia has details.
PPV
RECAP: WWE WrestleMania 26
It's
back. After over half-a-decade of feeling like any other PPV,
WrestleMania was WRESTLEMANIA again this year. From very entertaining
World/WWE title matches to very satisfying Bret/Vince closure to the
show-closing very emotional Taker/HBK Match of the Year candidate, it
was just one hell of a night. Let Rick Scaia fill you in.
PPV
RECAP: WWE Elimination Chamber 2010
With
two Chamber matches on the docket, WWE still gave us THREE title
changes. John Cena won the RAW Chamber, but was then screwed out of his
WWE Title when Vince ordered an impromptu match against Batista. And
Chris Jericho took the World Title from Undertaker in the SD Chamber,
but only with an assist from Shawn Michaels. Rick Scaia has all the
details you need in his write-up.
PPV: WWE
Royal Rumble PPV 2010
Edge
didn't just make his surprise return in this year's Royal Rumble Match;
he won it, and punched his ticket to the main event of WrestleMania 26.
The Rumble was one of the most entertaining in recent memory, and
capped off a mostly inoffensive undercard. Get the full report!
Do you have news, live show reports, or feedback about the
site? If so, we'd love to hear from you so that we can pass
it along to readers worldwide! Just send us an e-mail at rick@oowrestling.com.
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